JCAWORK family update and about Jen

[jcawork sister]

Well where do I begin. Jen was a wonderful person and she also told it like it was and never sugar coated anything. I think all of our family is the same way. Jen and my brothers were all born in Philly but I was born in good old DC. She use to love to upset me about that. Now I think its funny the walk is in DC.

Well her two boys Bobby the oldest is not doing great but now I think he is getting back on track. He took time off from work but just started back.

Jesse her youngest is doing well lets say he thinks he is ok and is working but I know the pain in there heart is more then they can stand.

Before Jenny passsed away she took care of everything to the where she would rest. It's kind of funny because I really was the only one she spent time with in the end well at lease knew how she really felt. So when she ask me to take her to the cemetery to pick a place and the guy was like well there this really nice place on top of the hill way far away( I HATE TO WALK) I told her she better be near the curb if she wanted to see me alot. It was a joke really. So we went home and I asked her where she picked she said on top of the hill just so I could walk there well then I said I will see you on your bday and mothers day,xmas that made her laugh so hard I think her back hurt. Well she passed away about 2 months later and I was given the key to a box not to open till she passed away. It had all her information in it and a note to tell me she was CURB side. And she is I can just drive up and sit in my car if I wanted. She was the best sister ever.

The best mother as well she never keeped things from the kids except that she was terminal because she wanted to see them happy till she died. But as a mom she showed them never let anyone push you around fight for what is yours. Be kind to women. Love your family no matter how crazy they are. We are a CRAZY IRISH family but she was are rock now we will need to come together to make us whole again. She told me that the best gift she can leave me is her boys because when I need to see her look at them and she will be right there.She was right. That was the thing with Jen she really was right about everything she knew more things they anyone I know.

She said to me Debbie I have taught you everything you know but not everything I know. I said to her what does that mean she said in time I would figure that out. I am now starting to do that.

I vist her aot and so do alot of people and when I see her grave I always see wine bottles her favorite the people at the grave site must think she was a drunk. Then I think what would Jen say. She would say fu__ them for all the money I spent here they should drop off wine to me. Sorry this note is so long but I miss her and I really can't talk to many people.

Jen had eyes that were like the ocean and a sailor mouth when she had to. She would lay her life down for her family so I say she was a great women that lived a full life in a short time. Myself I have not done half of what she ever did and I guess she would say jump in and live the good life you only get one.

I loved to hear from you guys and would love to keep in touch. If anyone wants to talk please feel free to send me a note. Jen knew alot about Lung Cancer and she did live longer then most with SCLC her docs said she was a true fighter and a pain in the *ss well she was going to run the show she always told me. The docs are here for me but I will decide how I am going to fight this diease and she did a great job fighting!!!!!!!!!!! Jen I love you and miss so more then I can ever say. My heart is broken now but I hope in time it will heal but you my love will never be forgotten and you wull always be my big sister who I looked up to everyday.

[Don Wood]

thanks so much for sharing with us about Jen. My heartfelt sympathies to you and her family. Don

[Nancy B]

Hi Jen's sister, I have sclc also and Jen and I talked on the phone acouple of times. I wish I could have gotten to know her better and meet her in person. I am not Irish, but it sounds like we are alot alike. I miss her and you and all of Jen's family are in my prayers.

Hugs,

Nancy B

[shelliemacs]

Your post made me cry too.

missing them is awful. grieveing them is unbearable. Remembering the good times is priceless.

Shelly

[shineladysue]

Thank you for sharing these thoughts about your sister with us. God Bless you and your family.

Sue

[luvmydog2]

Jen was a wonderful person from what I could gather from her posts. She is missed. Best wishes to you and the family. Come post as often as you like. We would love to hear from you.

[gail p-m]

What a lovely post about your very special sister. Sounds like you're pretty priceless yourself. What a beautiful relationship the two of you had. I'm sorry for your pain though but glad for your wonderful memories.

gail p-m

[teresag]

Seems those pain in the *ss people are always very much loved. Our dear Fay came to mind when I read your description of Jen's spirit. Peace to you and all Jen's family.

[cathy]

What a sweet story and beautiful tribute to a very special sister..

[Ann]

Jen was so loved by members of this board. She is deeply missed and thought of often. I am so very glad you shared a bit of insight about Jen's personality and love of life with us. Please keep in touch, as we all loved Jen so much. My heart goes out to you and her beautiful family.

[sharyn]

What a lovely note you wrote about your sis Jen... coming from an Irish family myself... I truly appreciate your description of her personality and her great sense of humor! The note about being "curbside" was truly priceless. I am sure it made you laugh during a time of incredible sorrow, which is exactly what Jen wanted that note to do!! You keep being a wonderful Aunt to those boys... that will be your greatest gift to your sister! I am sure she is smiling down on you and every time you "pull up" curbside, she is right there with you.

Much Love, Sharon

[Guest GoldenLove]

Hi Debbie -

My sister, Sharkats, died January 16, 2006 from SCLC. She fought the disease for 2 years and she fought it hard and never gave up. Even when the doctors stopped all treatments, she still did not want to give up. I was the one who drove to her home to tell her that her oncologist wanted to stop the treatment. I will never forget the look on her face and the profound sadness I felt. It took my breath away.....

I loved my sister very much and miss her every day. She loved animals and was in animal rescue most of her adult life. She began rescuing dobermans back in the 70's in Miami and ended up rescuing cats in Houston. She had such a profound love for animals and I am grateful that we shared this love. She was always the first one I called when one of my animals was sick......I can't tell you how many times I have thought I will call Shar and ask her what she thinks.

I followed your sister's posts on this website and found her to be incredibly strong as she fought her disease. I have continued to visit this website and have found some comfort in knowing my sister and I shared this website.

I understand when you say it is not always possible to talk to others about how we feel about the loss of our sisters. The grieving process is individualized and is not something one recovers from quickly. I think well meaning people are unsure of what to say to those of us who have lost someone.

Thanks for posting your feelings and for allowing me to express mine. I have always found everyone on this list to be very understanding and I know my sister connected with several people on this list.

Linda

[Maryanne]

Thank you so much for sharing all that. She was a beautiful lady and she faught right up to the end. For everything she was going through it is so hard to believe how she kept things to herself, not to upset her children.

Your post broke my heart and also made me cry. I feel so devestated for all of her family as they lost one of the most couregeous, beautiful, brave woman by this moster of a disease.

I pray the walk goes well, I know her whole family will be there with her walking right beside them.

You sister will live on in all those wonderful memories she made. I wish I knew her personally as she was always here to give everyone encouragment.

Peace be with you,

Maryanne

[Cindy RN]

I am so glad to see you post.

Jen and I talked on the phone several times about how this disease effected our families. She was a fighter!

The best legacy she can have is how she effected the people left behind-

Love Cindy RN