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Nearest family member livng near you___________


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I went to the foot doctor and I was filling out paperwork. You know that line that says nearest relative living near you. I had nothing to put down. I put my step dad but I would never want him called in an emergency. I know this is just a stupid thing, that I can put a friend there or whatever but it was another reminder of how alone I am. I am grateful for my husband and children, don't get me wrong but I miss my mom so desperately. I long to call her or stop by.

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I know what you mean. My mom has been gone almost 15 yrs. and I still miss her terribly. I used to have dreams after she passed that she was calling me on the telephone from heaven.

Life will never be the same for you without your dear mom, but in time you will adjust to life without her. Hold tight to your husband and your children, they will help to keep you strong.

God Bless,


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Boy oh boy do I know what you mean. I am currently renovating my house and it was only because of my Mom that I was doing it. I can't tell you how many times I have picked up the phone and almost dialed her cell phone number to get some advice on things or to see what color something should be. Then it hits me like a ton of bricks that she is not there and there are no cellphones in heaven......... :cry::(

I don't know what to do most of the time but sit there and cry. I feel so alone and just plain empty.

Prayers and a big hug for you, PM me if you like, I really don't mind.


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I just had the same thing happen to me when I went to the eye doctor recently (hadn't been there in 4 years) -- they needed my background info. updated and when it came to who to contact in an emergency question, I had no one to put down!!! Empty sort of feeling that sends a chill right through you too.

Then consider that I have to go back shortly -- the doc. figures I'm a candidate for glaucoma and I need more tests and "we should start treatment"....there's none of that in my family history either, so here I go again, only it's advocating and researching for me (alone) this time!

Missing family is a biggie -- family was always supposed to be who you could rely on for support, advice, and comfort from that big 'ol world out there.... :cry:

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I SO understand!!! (((KIM)))

DH and I have had conversations along these same lines since my Dad's death. Dad was always (or for many years of my life) a single parent prior to marrying my SM....so in many ways I too am now parentless. My mother has bounced in and out (more out than in) of our lives since she and Dad divorced when I was 4 and I have not seen or heard from her for almost 10 yrs now. SM and I have never had a parent/child type of relationship as I had already married and moved from home when she and Dad married, so our relationship has been one of mutual respect rather than parent/child. I would never think of putting either of them on a medical form as nearest relative... not meaning that in a bad way just wouldn't feel comfortable doing so as neither one fits a parental role in my life.

DH says I do still have parents - as his parents are also my "parents". I have tried to explain that in some odd way -- it just isn't the same thing. I know without any doubt that they would do anything for me... but it just doesn't feel the same and I am not sure it ever will. So while I do definately have other support systems ... they just can not and will not ever take the place of Dad :cry:.

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parents and children can simply not be replaced. I have this discussion with my stepfather who is dating now (wasn't that quick)and is taking his new girlfreind to the camping place he and my mother enjoyed just months ago. What is wrong with this picture??

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Hey, I know how you feel. I lost my husband to LC in June 2005. I lost my mom this past January to colon cancer. all I have is my 77 year old Dad, and alot of stuff makes him very uncomfortable. I had a D&C last week and I had to have someone drive me and take me home. The hospital even said I had to have someone stay with me at least overnight. an adult that is - not my five year old. Well, Dad was going to take me but I could tell he wanted to be nowwhere near the hospital women's pavilion, so I had one friend (a guy) take me, another friend (a gay guy) pick me up. Dad picked up Faith from daycare and brought her home - 45 min. after I got home from the hospital. I wasn't even supposed to drive the entire next day because I had anesthesia so late in the day, but I HAVE to drive Faith to kindergarten in the mornings, so I couldn't think of anyone to inconvenience at 7:30 am, so I drove her myself, fortified with alot of coffee. (my dad lives on another side of town from me)

I have to put TWO emergency contacts for Faith's kindergarten and daycare, OTHER than me. I could think of no one other than my Dad. I finally asked my dead husband's boss's wife (who is a stay at home mom to three) if I could put her down. They are very generous minded folks and she didn't mind a bit.

So far I've only had to put one emergency contact for myself and I use my Dad, but he's always out playing golf or going on date or working his part time job, so who knows if anyone would ever actually track him down. he has a pay as you go cell phone which he doesn't turn on because it's "just for emergencies."

so talk about feeling alone - I know what you mean.

You just sort of learn to deal with it, and ask friends for help, even though you know they're busy. Keep asking and SOMEONE will do it, that's what I find.

Hang in there,


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hey, I'm with you on wanting to call your Mom. I REALLY REALLY miss my mom. My husband Dave died in June and at the time Mom was recovering from a major liver surgery (colon mets to the liver). She cried on the phone when I called from the hospital to tell my parents Dave died - she cried because she couldn't come down to be with me. But she was always there for me to talk to between that time and when she lost her battle in January. I could always call her and TALK to her and she would be my mom. I really miss talking to her. sometimes I think it was harder to lose my mom than Dave but I think what it was, after he was gone I had HER, now I have no one. if she had died first, I would have had Dave to talk to and it would have been harder to lose him last. does that make sense?

maybe. Mom never suffered. she just got weaker and weaker. Dave was in so much pain the last few months of his life and because of the pain, I started losing him. in a way that prepared me for his death I think.

anyway, yeah, you just want to call your mom.

I think I'm ramblig again.

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"mamasbabygirl"] Take care of yourself Lori, be as loyal to your company as they have been to you, go back to school, take care of my baby boys.

If I close my eyes and shut out the world..I too can hear my Dad saying words along those same lines Lori. Of course in my case they would be proceeded with the "I'm not telling you how to live your life, but..." line that Dad was so famous for starting most of our serious conversations with. :lol:

"mamasbabygirl"]It just sucks to not hear it one more time..

AMEN!!!Brings me to tears EVERY time I allow myself to "really" think about it. Breaks my heart into a million pieces every single time - as I suspect it does your and other on this board as well. It truly does SUCK!!!

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