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beat it

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Well I'm here for awhile folks.

NSCLC, Stage 3 Invasive, Multiple spots, both lungs, Lymphs on airway and about 6 inches on spine. sizes like 1.8 x 1.6 x 1.9 and 1.8 x 1.8 with pulera thicking. No radition per the pulmanary doc today, to extensive. Appt on Monday with Oncologist. Worried about the stamina in my mother in law. maybe its early yet......maybe she'll get to fighting soon.........

So you've all been there. Suggestions? Lay persons definition of Invasive stage 3?

I would fight like a starving lion who's cub had just been attacked.....but I'm not the one with the cancer.

Thoughts?

Beat it!!

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Suggestions. It's tough, which is what stinks about this disease. Every one is different. As is every case.

I can only tell you my experience and what the Dr. said I did right.

When mom was diagnosed, (stage 4 to brain and other places. THe brain was the immediate problem) they wanted to radiate immediately. Mom said no, took her time, found out everything that was wrong with her. Really took the time she needed. And from day one, I told her I would go to every appt., listen WITH her, and whatever she decided, I would fully support.

Honor your m-i-l's wishes. Offer support and understanding.

Don't beat yourself up over trying to "cure" this. That is up to the doctors. Second opinions are always good, but when it comes down to it, you can't "fix this" your self.

Just support.

My wife supported my mother by going to the beach and getting their nails done...because she listened to what mom wanted. And moms 30 days were good because of that listening.

God bless you and I just said a prayer for you.

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Beat it,

Well I was hoping to read some much better news about the diagnosis. I am so sorry the cancer fears have come true. GRRRRRRRRR

Nick has offered some good suggestions already and I am sure the others will be along soon with even more. The best I can say to you right now is to stay positive and be as supportive and reassuring as you can. This is an overwhelming time but once the treatment schedule is figured out and in place it will become routine.

Keep posting and let us know how things go and what we can do.

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers,

Chris

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Here is what Deb and I did. everyone is different first of all. When we walked out of the surgeons office we threew out our cigarettes. Had been trying to quit for several years. We spent the next 3 days crying and hugging and getting the "Weakness" out or the Grief of this diagnosis. The Day that we walked into the Oncologists office we had a notebook for questions and were determined tpo beat this disease. She did beat it and has beat it. She can sing and yell and breathe deep without pain from thr heavens. We enjoyed 2 years, 11 months,3 weeks and a couple of days roughly together fighting this thing. Ever here the Phrase "Refuse to Lose" That was what we did. Lots of bumps but we got over them together.

There is a lot of fear here in dealing with this disease. It is not curable BUT treatments are improving rapidly to treat it as a Chronic disease, not a terminal disease. Ther is of Course, No Eveidence of Disease, or NED as we call him here that si the goal right now for everyone fighting this disease. Some here are presently at that point of being NED. We want your mother in law to get to that point now. CAn you show her the good news stories or the survivors stories? Sometimes hearing some one elses story inspires someone. WEE did that last nite in CHat between a new members Mom and a member who has been fighting for 6 years and continues the fight. Sending prayers. Let us know what we can do to help you aand family with.

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Well, it sounds like you are already doing what you can, as in tying to learn everything you can about the disease and reaching out for support. Because of this website and all of the knowledgeable people here, every time I would go into the oncology office with mom, we joked that the Dr. would go into a room, pull his hair out and plan on a long visit. :lol:

Most of the time, we would be the ones suggestting different things to try. I would print survivor stories for my mom and she loved me reading them to her-it gave her a ton of hope.

Please let us know what you need to help your MIL.

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I knew you guys would be there !!

Yep, we'll be OK. Uphill from here I guess but thats ok.

Thanks for all the advice and concern. WOW instant family!! Cool!!

Week and a half ago I bought a 3 ring binder and have been putting survivor stories in it almost daily, along with easy to read facts on cancer stages and terms I have cut and pasted to be Lay person friendly for the family. I know all have used it at some point. I push, positve thoughts and while been realistic with them - demand nothing but the best possible attitudes for recovery. Reminding them I could be killed in an accident too before cancer took her. I too have already been in 2 appts with notebooks for answers and recording the info as it comes for refreshing us later. It's tough to be leaned on for support by many but apparently it is my calling for this time and I will. Having a place to come like this is super. It helps to regenerate the drive to get back at it.

I'll be around now so I hope to meet many of you and appreciate all the compasion I have received this far!

Blessings to all!

Beat it!!

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Hi beat it. I'm sorry about the dx., but you're right, this is the best place to be. Keeping a binder is a great thing. Just FYI in case you are interested (and I gave these out for about a year) but the Lance Armstrong Foundation gives out free survivorship notebooks. In them are areas for test results, papers, medical records, notes, etc...there are also inserts of survivor stories and other cancer survivor tips in them as well.

This is a ringed binder and it's quite big, but it's awesome and it's free (you have to pay shipping) If you are interested you can still get them at www.laf.org

Keep us updated, we will be here for you.

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Beat it,

Sorry to hear the pathology came back positive for cancer. Never heard of Invasive Stage 3. You mention something on the spine? My understanding is that if the cancer has spread to areas outside the lungs, it is Stage 4. I would double check with your MIL's MD to clarify stage. The others have all given you good suggestions to get started. Let us know how you make out. I will keep you and your MIL in my prayers.

God Bless,

Sharon

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I questioned the stage too Quote " Stage 3 Invasive" I had read about 3a or 3b but not invasive. The nurse said they dont use a or b anymore???Also during our pathology appt the nurse contridicted herself more than once. Re-reading my notes I can see that. Ultimatly we need the Professianal to talk to, I dont have hard feelings towards her at all. We just arent clear yet. She couldnt tell me what type cell either which I thought was interesting, just that it was Non Small cell????

Beat it!!

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Beat it,

Sounds like you are already on top of things -- good for you! I agree with the statement that Mamasbabygirl said about visiting the Oncologist. I let mine know right from the get-go that I'd be the perennial question asker and he was good with that. When I drop off articles about different treatments, he does ask me if I think he doesn't read anything!

As far as fighting goes, Tony asked me right after he got to his room out of surgery what the verdict was. I told him it wasn't good, and he said "now we fight." He's fought all along and has never considered otherwise.

Stage IIIb - IV is how he was diagnosed. Depends on how you read the differing views, but they told us at the beginning that it was kind of a moot point. Once you've reached those stages, there is no cure, BUT there is the ability to treat it as a chronic disease. Tony has never met Mr. NED during all of his treatment. He just keep chasing it back as best as he can. That's his view of the whole thing. Your MIL may come around to this attitude. Give her time, it's such a wallop to the head to get this diagnosis.

Also, there is a lot of apples and oranges in the lung cancer world. Everyone presents differently. Tony's lungs looked like a coal miner with the cancer, but his never metastasized outside of the lung area. Who knows why someone who has so much cancer didn't have it run amok somewhere else? You MIL's oncologist may have some tricks up his/her sleeve to reduce some of the cancer with chemo to make her a candidate for some radiation. Wait until a game plan is in place. Having a game plan makes a lot of difference emotionally for everyone involved.

Hope for the best!

Regards,

Welthy

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