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Tough 13 days but Mom is now home


lc46

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Grace

Hi-thanks for the kinds words.

Yes I know there will many "moments" I have 2 small kids that are demanding enough. It is all beginning to take it's toll.....physically and mentally and then of course the guilt if I start to feel overwhelmed-everyone thinks I am a superwoman. I make it all look so easy so they think I don't get stressed out ever.

I am her only caregiver. My 2 brothers think stopping in every 10-15 days to sit with her for one hour is doing their share. Oh well......

How is your husband doing?

Talk to you soon.

Dar

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Wow, two weeks or so into this and so many changes. Weeks after a diagnosis is a whirlwind and having kids to care for on top of this must be overwhelming.

When my Dad was diagnosed, I called in sick a day or two the following months because my eyes were so swollen from crying. I'm usually not one to call in sick but my emotions had gone amok. I finally relented two months ago when my Dad had a recurrence, went and saw a doctor and got the same prescriptions my Dad has been using to cope with all this: Lexapro and Xanax. They have really helped.

It's great you can have your Mom in your home. Give yourself time, you've received a huge blow to your family. When the going gets tough the tough gets going, right? Small Cell does respond to chemo and females have a great chance of surviving. Don't give up yet, you still have hope :) .

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Dar,

I am glad to hear your mom is out of the hospital.

that alone helps her emtionally. Sounds like you have

a fighter in your mom.

Oh the crying spells, how we have all been there.

When my husband was first dignosed I didn't cry at

all and I never understood why. I think I was in shock for a few days. Then the dam broke

and I could not shut it off. As time goes on you will adjust to your "new normal".

I still cry today. Alan is doing so very well and yet

there are days when life just grabs hold of my heart

and squeezes until the tears just come. Now I let it

happen, have a good cleansing cry and feel better.

If you need to, ask for help. If friends offer to come watch your little ones so you can get

out and shop ect, let them!!! The time away from the house will probably do you some good.

prayers to you and your family

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HI Dar,

I am so glad she is home now...It was such a scary whirlwind there for a while...things are still uncertain, but at least she is home, with you, where she is happy and you all can be together.

I read your post and re-lived my cancer journey thru your words. I was the "super woman". My brothers (all older) popped in every few weeks or once a month. They thought by making a call to check in every now and then was enough- of course it wasn't. I did everything and I was completely overwhelmed too. But I don't once regret it for a split second.

Crying in the bathroom is your way of releasing everything you held in for so long. You need to let it out however you can. It is ok to cry.

I remember being at the dentist and having to wait a really long time in that chair for my appointment to begin. I cried like a baby sitting in that room all by myself....(I mean ugly sniffly crying) :wink: by the time the dentist came in to start my appointment, and he saw my face, he knocked $250 off my dental work. He he...

You've got to let it out. And take small breaks if you can. Just to recharge..even if it's just a walk or an hour or if you can get in a whole day away....it will do you some good to not be "on" all the time.

It's natural for your mind to jump ahead to the waht ifs and the negative thoughts. Everyone does...but try to remind yourself to live in the moment...take it a simple moment at a time and enjoy being with your mom for however long that is. Your time may be limited, BUT remember that there ARE extensive stage SCLC survivors out there...who were once in treatment and weak and battling their disease, just like your mom, who made it thru treatment and are CANCER FREE today. Yes, it does happen.

I'm praying for just that for your mom. Hang onto hope. Hang onto each other...your "talks" and "moments" will happen in whatever way your mom wants them too. Just by bringing her to your mom, you have shown her how much you love her.

What a great daughter you are.

I'm sending loads of positive thoughts and prayers for your mom and your family that things continue to improve everyday.

Hugs,

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Hi everyone-Thank you for all the kinds words.

My Mom is pretty upset today. She's talking about dying, and that she doesn't want to suffer. I told her not to even think about that now. We need to stay positive and take everything one day @ a time and enjoy each day we have together. It's so hard. I think when she was in the hospital she felt much safer and had nurses in and out all day. Now reality has hit that we are back home and she can look out the window and see the leaves changing color. When we were in the hospital all she could see was another building across the way.

Thanks everyone for responding. I don't really know who I would be talking to if not you guy's since no one knows how your life is changed by this unless you are going through it or already have.

Take care

Dar

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Just let her know you won't let her suffer, tell her you can get her to the hospital quickly or do whatever is needed to make sure she is ok. It might help to get her some anti-anxiety meds too if she doesn't have them yet. She may feel better is she does advanced directives as to what she wants etc. Hang in there.

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Dar,

I am so glad you have your Mom with you. I know how difficult it is, but treasure the moments. Through all the difficulties, there will be moments of special things. When I was taking care of my Dad, I was so overwhelmed, it is such a difficult journey. The one thing I focused on was reassuring my Dad I would see him thru whatever the days would bring. I do believe it brought him comfort

Sending prayers to you and your Mom

NancyT

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Cindy

Hi no she is doing much better today. We had a long talk about staying positive. She is starting her 2nd round of chemo in 5 more days. She feels pretty good today. They released her from the hospital because

they said the pneumonia looked much better and her blood count was up overnight to over 1000 from 0.

Dar

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