Having a bad day....again

[mrmust]

Wednesday was a bad day for me. No significant reason or event. I cried myself to sleep tues. night and didn't get up until thurs. afternoon. Called in sick to work. Didn't shower. Didn't eat. Just wanted to lay there. I also felt physically sick to my stomach.

I think I seriously need to see someone because I am feeling kinda crazy!

I hope I don't have anymore days like that......can't afford to lose my job!

Thanks for letting me vent!

Jill

[RandyW]

My first thought is a sitdown with a clergyman. You need to get it out. I understand your pain having lost my wife short of 10 years together and 3 of fighting LC. A couple of sites that some use and are good are;

1) http://beyondindigo.com/

2) http://www.ywbb.org/forums/ubbthreads.php?Cat=0

I recommend these sites as an aid for your grief. I would defineitely reccomend talking about it. You amy also want to check into a Local support group. We have members who have done this also.

I used to be the same way for a while. I am very busy here, I go to her grave with flowers every Sunday Morning. I cry to sleep some nites and am getting sad writing this but; with the help and support of people here, I avoided falling into a Bottle or more dealing with this whole battle.

The sun comes up in the morning and sets every nite. The pain gets duller daily, but will never go away. we have many that have gone through this grief and are now.We are here to help with anything we can. Sending prayers for you and a better day today.

[Nick C]

Oh Jill, I am so sorry.

If you think you need to see someone, you should.

I started seeing someone this week. I'm working I'm functional. I'm not enjoying life to the fullest and I cry a lot (a lot for me anyway), but I still see the benefit in talking to someone.

A friend (girl I dated many years ago) lost her dad when she was 13. She is now doing group therapy with other women who have lost parents.

Give any of it a shot if you think it'll help. If it doesn't, you certainly didn't do any harm.

[Ann]

So very sorry you're having such a rought time right now. We all understand what you are going through. I found that it helps a lot to have someone to talk to about your feelings. That person can be a professional but a good friend can also be beneficial. Talking to someone that's a really good listner somehow helps to get it all out. I also found that writing helped me a lot. I would actually write long letters to Dennis and keep them in a journal. The writing was just another way of setting me inner feelings free. Please let us know if there is anything we can do to help.

[michelepal]

JILL,

I'm so sorry for your pain!!

(((HUGS)))

Love, Michele

[mrmust]

Thank you all so much for your replies! It is nice to know that other people have had the same experiences...........makes me feel less crazy??? I work at the hospital where Joe died (7pm-7am) and some nights I have nothing to do but sit and think...think WAY TOO MUCH and not always constructively. At least I know I can come to this site and find people who really care and understand.

I am calling my companys' Employee Assistance Program as soon as I finish here. Like Nick said..if it doesn't help at least it didn't do any harm.

Thank you all so much!!! What a wonderful group of people!!

Jill

[Mskim]

I am glad you are able to get help... it is funny you posted that becasue Halloween snet me into a tail spin and Wednesday morning I woke up crying and pretty much didn't stop until Thursday morning when my friend who belongs to my church and is in the youth group committee, called to tell me I had to be at Thursdays meeting. They were wondering why I was late. I told her I had nothing to give, that I was having a hard time and I just wanted to be left alone. She pushed and pushed until I finally threw my hair in a pony and washed my face and went. It was about fellowship and caring and I am glad my wallowing didn't keep me home becasue I would probably still be in bed.

Maybe a Church fellowship is not your avenue, but if some type of counselor can help you pick yourself up it would be wonderful. Now I am certainly not getting on my high horse, I am not fixed and I don't think there is a way to fix this but just learning day to day how to get up and get through is an accomplishment.

HUGS