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Mom's depressed...


dawn79

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...and I have no idea what to do about it. This is an absolute nightmare. I went over to their house today to help mom shower, but she was too sick to shower (she's diabetic and has a kidney disease on top of LC) so I just sat there with her. She was in a bad mood because one of her sisters told her that she needs "to get off the couch and take some anti-depressants." I told her that maybe it would be a good idea, but she's on so many meds already (14, I believe) that she doesn't want to take any more drugs. I can't say I blame her...but at the same time, when she looks at you and says, "I just want to die," what am I supposed to say to her? I'm frustrated, I'm mad, I'm at the end of my pitiful rope and I don't know what to do. I fear for her, I fear for my 80-year old dad who's waiting on her hand and foot, and I am just stuck. I help as much as I can, but it's not enough. What do I do???

I HATE LUNG CANCER!!!!

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I think I wrote this same post a year and a half ago. One of our more intelligent members told me that, "Of course she's depressed! She has LC!"

Of course she is depressed, and of course you are overwhelmed. If anti-depressants can work for her, then what is one more pill, if her doctor says it is OK for her? Mom tried them, but because of her other med problems (see below), she couldn't take them--they made her horribly sick. Others have had WONDERFUL results on them.

Take care of yourself while you are taking care of your mom. Keep us updated. I hope things get easier.

:) Kelly

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Dawn, I am so sorry for what you are dealing with right now. Personally, if it were me, I'd make an appointment with your Mom's dr to talk about whether some anti-depressive would work into her current regiment. Does she have a storage compartment to separate all of her pills into the times she's supposed to take them? As long as she can keep them all straight and it doesn't conflict with any other meds, there isn't much difference in taking 15 as opposed to 14.

I think when a person gets so down that they can't advocate for themselves, it helps if a loved one can step in and do it for them. To get her to take them, tell her to try them and if she doesn't feel better in a little while then she can quit them. Sometimes I think they need an "out" and don't want to commit to anything long term. Of if you think she may resist because of an issue of pride or stigma, just tell her it's just to get her through the rough spot she's in right now.

Take care of yourself too!

Shauna

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It would be abnormal if she were not depressed!

If you can maybe talk to her doctor about anti-depressants. My parents were always very anti anti-depressants. It was a battle to get them started when my mom got diagnosed, but I have to say, to this day, my mom says "g-d bless Paxil" :) Maybe you can tell your mom it will make her more comfortable.

My mom is also on a lot of medication, she is also diabetic, she had a triple bypass, etc, but the Paxil really helped.

Keep us posted

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Hoping things are turning around for the better. Give it time. This is a tough diagnosis to face and the treatments take such a toll on the body and mind.

Keep posting. It really helps.

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