PUTTING THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE

[RAY A]

No one wants to die and everyone would like to live forever. But for me I have to put things in perspective. this last weekend our next door neighbors son died from a fire when he was at college. He was attending West Virgina and he was only 20 years old. It was one of the most heart breaking things I ever had to go to. One of the nicest kids you ever want to meet. The preast said it right when he said you dont measure life by the number of years you spend here but what impact you made while you were here. There must of been 500 people that came to the viewing in three days. This 20 year old impacted alot of lives. Im 44, Have I lived long enough? NO!!! but life is very tempory and if I had A choice of god takeing me or one of my boys....I think you know what the answer to that is. SOme times I feel lucky to be in my position im in.. I will get a chance to say good bye. Not that im going anywere soon (I hope) I remember when My boys were young and the would get sick I would always say I wish it was me vs them. Well I got my wish. I have a frend that has colin cancer and he said you want to get a reality check go to a childrens hospital and you will stop feeling sorry for yourself real quick.

DOnt mean yo bum anyone out just needed to vent a little.

Thanks FOr listening.

J.L. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN OUR HEARTS

[Don Wood]

Thanks, Ray, for sharing that. No one knows like a cancer survivor knows how precious time is. Let's not squander a moment, unless it is having fun, and that's not squandering. Don

[Carleen]

Ray very beautifully and elloquantly put. I know that I feel that Keith is way too young to be facing the possibility of his own mortality, but the other day he told me he felt like he was lucky because he was thinking about all the small children he sees in the oncology ward, and he felt they were never given the chance to live life and know what it was like to be a carefree child. Many of them face the same prognosis and the possibility of death, and he felt lucky that he was able to live a good life with a loving family good friends and a fantastic wife and therefore was lucky.

[Remembering Dave]

Ray, vent away!!!!!! Your neighbors sons death is truely a tragedy. I am so sorry to hear about it. I can relate to what you are saying about your sons not only because of my daughter but the other day I was talking to my Mother and we got on the subject of diabetes and cancer which runs on different sides of our famuily and I said told her that I was glad I got cancer instead of my sisters. I know that my cancer has nothing to do with my sisters odds of not getting it but I guess it makes me feel better in a way. Hang in there buddy and never give up the fight. By the way how is that twitch??

David C

[Connie B]

Hey little Brother,

First you need a hug ((((((((Brother Ray))))))))

When I read your story about your friends son I just froze up. We just had the same thing happen here in the Twin Cities (MN) to three College kids last week, then last week we had a little five year old get shot in the face by three teen's, then over the weekend we had 4 teens get killed in a car/train crash all this within 10 days. My heart breaks every time I hear of young people or kids being killed or dx.d with ANY kind of cancer or diseases. NOT to mention I know what it's like to be a parent having lost a child, I lost my beautiful, wonderful, precious son at the YOUNG age of 25. That is ONE thing I would NEVER wish on any parent in this world to have to experience the loss of a child. IT's even worse then having cancer, if you can believe that??

I am so grateful to have been here for 51 years, and if I get another year after this, then HOW GRATEFUL AND WONDERFUL IS THAT??? I only ask for months at a time, because my husband always says, "it's for the needed not the greedy" I would trade my life in a second to let a young person live. I have made an impact in my life for others, and I am grateful I was able to do that. I had two beautiful kids, my daughter has given me two beautiful grandkids, I have made COUNTLESS WONDERFUL FRIENDS just from being a lung cancer survivor, and I do feel I have impact others and helped others that have been tossed into this hell hole called cancer, along with countless things I have done in my life. Some good and some not so good!!!

I sure don't want to die just yet, but I honestly am not afraid of dying. I feel I am in a win win situation. On this side I have my family, and friends, and on the other side I have family and friends. All my family and friends on THIS side will go on with there lives, just like we ALL do after we lose a loved one, and some day we will ALL be together again and how great is that????? But for now I am just going to be grateful to get up (this morning) and hear the birds and see the rain, and sun and clouds, talk to my family and friends, etc.... while I am given this gift of life here on earth TODAY!! Life is a GIFT TODAY, because tomorrow never comes.

Oh my brother, you go right ahead and vent. You know this is the place to do that!!! How have you been doing on your chemo?? How are things going for you?? I am SOOOO sorry your friend lost his son, and I am sorry you lost a friend. It breaks my heart Ray!!! Love and Hugs to You!!

[bobmc]

THANKS Ray!!!

OUTSTANDING post, and so, so very true, The most important thing I can do today is be grateful for the gifts God has given me.Thanks for reminding me. Seems your feet are on real solid spiritual ground today, Ray, , keep it up it suits ya.

AND Connie, a ((((( BIG HUG ))))) to ya girl, so glad to hear from you,; You got me smiling, with a teardrop in my eye. Much being said from the heart today! I think cancer survivors do that the best. It's good, it's life. Keep on keeping on! Good to be a SURVIVOR TODAY!

God bless and stay well

Bobmc- NSCLC- stageIIB- left pneumonectomy- 5/2/01

" absolutely insist on enjoying life today"