brsarah Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 It has only been six days since my mom has passed. Everywhere there is a memory, thought of her. I cannot believe she is gone. I still have her cell phone and I have called it several times in the last few days just to hear her voice. I have never felt grief before and boy is it scary. I go from feeling just numb to sorrow and then depressed. I never realized how often I've done things just for my mom in my life. She was my audience. She told me when my clothes looked great, when I got a good hair cut, how much I changed. Now, I feel like my number one supporter is not watching anymore. I just wish she would give me a sign or something. I have not returned back to work yet but will probally feel better once I'm busy. It is also very hard after the ceremony ends, family and friends go home and you are left with your thoughts. Sorry to be such a downer, but I'm not sure where else to vent. Thanks for all the support. Prayers and Hope for all those on this path. Sarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 She is still watching down on you, Sarah. Believe me, you are going through all the normal emotions -- I am 4 months out and still nowhere and everywhere. Hang in there. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick C Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 I remember the early days Sarah. I remember how surprised I was about what grief felt like. I am still surprised some days. I have a couple of voice mails from her I have not listened to since...can't do it. Too painful. We are here for you. We know what you are going through. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sis Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Sarah, It's been over a month since I lost my sister and I still reach for the phone to call her and tell her something "important"! They say time heals all wounds. We'll have to see. Ellie (Sis) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharyn Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Sarah, I don't have any magic words to make you feel better. Your Mom was so much a part of you and I guess your right, you don't realize how much, until she is not there. Please take some comfort in knowing that she is at peace and keep watching for that sign.... I truly believe you will get one. Love, Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 (((((Sarah))))) Keep coming here and talking anytime you need. None of us have been in your shoes... but still somehow we get it. We care and we're here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomsGirl Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 What you said, "she was my audience"...that touched me beyond words and hit home. Yes, yes, yes...our moms tell us all that stuff that no one else does (at least convincingly)...the last time I saw my mom before she got very bad, she asked if I'd done something different with my hair (I had)and complimented me on how flattering my shirt was (I was six months pregnant!) Oh, Sarah, I'm so sorry you are going through this. I know it is like losing your conscience and your touchstone. Married, unmarried, kids or no kids...no matter how many people you have close to you and around you, no one knows you like your mom. You are her daughter, and you always will be. I hope that you remember that in the upcoming days. She made you what you are, and she does live inside of you. Having said that, I know the pain you are feeling so well, and yes, it just sucks and hurts and it's totally unfair. And it's unreal. Know that I am thinking of you and sharing in your grief... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Martha02 Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Sarah, I still have my mom's phone number on my cell phone after a year. I am so sorry you are going through this. It's not an easy road. You will get your sign at the right time. I did. take care Martha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Sarah...I am so very sorry for the pain you are feeling. When I lost my mother, I felt the same way. I felt as if the only person that had ever truly loved me, with unconditional love, was gone from my life and I was all alone. But, in time, I began to feel as if my mother was a real part of me, as she will live forever in my heart. Just remember that your mom is right there with you, in everything you say and do. You can still feel her presence, talk to her and know that she's right there in your heart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamasbabygirl Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Oh yeah, I am feeling this too right now Sarah. My mom was my main support all of my life and I am so unsure without her. I understand these feelings. They suck. Hang in there... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melindasue37 Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Sarah, I can relate to the feelings you are having. I, too, lost my Mom 4 months ago. It hurts to lose that one person who loves us unconditionally. Sure, everyone has friends and family but there is nothing comparable to a mothers love. Grief is SO consuming right now for you I'm sure. Just take things one day at a time. You're doing all the right things, one foot in front of the other and continue to reach out when you need a little support. Warm Hugs, Melinda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michelepal Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Sarah, I'm sorry for your pain! Time does help!My Dad has been gone almost 14mts and I still think of him all all the time. Take care of yourself that's what your Mom would want.. (((HUGS))) Love, Michele Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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