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Hospice Says One Week Left


justme2007

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My poor mom. She's on a 50 mcg fentanyl patch now, plus occasional liquid morphine and vicodin for breakthrough pain. She can't walk so has a catheter in. This has really gone so fast.

The hospice nurse said this morning her guess would be another week to live. I got here last night and am taking off work and staying her with her and my dad to the end. I am doing all I can for her, helping her drink and feeding her grapes and popsicles, sleeping in her room on a hide-a-bed. There's nowhere else I can think of being right now.

My poor mom. She is so very thin. Her friends are all coming to visit and crying as they leave. It's hard to watch but beautiful at the same time. We are calling the priest tomorrow for Last Rites (can't remember the current phraseology).

When she has the breakthrough pain, she says she wishes "this would all be over." I told her we can talk to the nurse tomorrow about increasing the fentanyl. I also told her it's okay for her to let go when she wants, that we will all be okay. I told her that God will take her when He's ready and she's ready. I really don't want my mom to die, but I just have to live in the moment, not a week from now, or it's too hard. I'm so glad I'm here with her.

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Please know my prayers are going out to you and your mom and dad tonite, try to stay strong, I know it may sound like a difficult thing to do, but you are, you have been, I know what you are going thru, I went thru the same with my dad. I know he tried to hang on, but we all told him it was alright to go.

Please know we are here for you.

Grace

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I'm so sorry... It is so hard when it happens faster than you expect. Your post makes me remember my last week with my Mama.... As hard and terrible and hurtful as they all may be... let part of you treasure the moments you spend with your Mom. It is both terrible and beautiful....

Just... hurting with you and praying for your Mom's peace and yours.

Val

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Thank you all. :) Last night was bizarre. She was very agitated and had a feeding frenzy with peanuts, even though she could hardly pick them up and kept missing her mouth. She kept on asking me non-sensical questions until 2 a.m. Her very dry sense of humor has returned with all that pain medication I think, so I've been jokingly calling her Chatty Kathy.

At one point, she had pulled her nightgown over her head and was breathing heavily because she had pulled her breathing tube out of her nose (she keeps doing that), and I didn't know about it. So I'm sleeping in her bed now so I have a better chance of being aware of these things as they happen.

She's looking forward to her granddaughter coming again today, and a good friend of hers.

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Prayers for peace during this time. I know how emotionally draining this time is for you -- it's also a time of reward just to be there; I'm glad you got to be there with your mom.

My mom kept pulling out the oxygen tube from her nose too...she never remembered doing it, never acknowledged that she had it on when she'd get up and move around and come to the end of the tubing length -- I never could figure that one out. Our hospice nurse said, "well, maybe she doesn't need it." I never could figure that statement out either.

Gentle hugs,

Linda

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I'm so glad that you are there right now. My prayers continue for all of you and I hope that there are some womderful quality moments between you and your mom. You're doing the right thing...live in the moment- just one moment and one day at a time.

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You will never regret doing everything you are doing right now. It is such an honor to be with your mom as she prepares to go on an amazing journey. Know that God will take her when he is ready...and that there will be such peace. You are doing God's work right now which is simply beautiful.

So much love for you over the next few days,

holly

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