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Late night ramblings...


MomsGirl

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Hey all-

Went to look for a sympathy card tonight for a friend, and realized that I look at these cards through new eyes now. All the ones I used to buy and I thought were so profound and comforting that said "May your memories comfort you and bring you peace" and "How blessed you were to have this person", etc...I realize now that when you lose someone you love deeply, initially the memories bring you great pain. And you are pissed off that they are gone, you're not really thinking about the blessing of having had them. Yes, of course these sentiments in the card will hopefully come to fruition for the person...like WAY down the road...but when grief is raw, you aren't thinking that way. Instead I picked out a card that simply let him know we were thinking of him and sharing in his sorrow...much like the sentiments expressed on this board when someone posts about a loss. I love that people are so honest and really understand how it feels here - it's so comforting sometimes.

Just some thoughts.

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I realize now that when you lose someone you love deeply, initially the memories bring you great pain. And you are pissed off that they are gone, you're not really thinking about the blessing of having had them.

amen.

you are thinking about the rest of your life NOT having them....and how absolutely crappy that is.

In different circumstances and in different ways, we DO understand "loss" here...it's the honesty and sincerity we support each other with that gets us thru a moment at a time.

Thanks for letting me late night ramble with you...

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Me too.

In fact, I've seriously contemplated designing my own cards that say things like, "Grief sucks."

and "When you're tired of eating those billion casseroles and need a shoulder to cry on, I'll take you to Applebees."

ot just, "I'm here."

But the other thing I learned from losing Mom is that something.... even the most terrible sympathy cards... was better than nothing.

((((hugs)))) to you.

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I too have had to buy a few of these cards since mom passed. I don't know that I even did before (wife must have taken care of that stuff).

But I will echo the sentiment, the fact that anyone sent something was what mattered...

But I think a new line of cards may be quite an idea.

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I agree. The week after my mom passed away I had to buy a card for my husbands friend whose 22 year old handicapped son died and I cried my way thru the card aisle. I ended up with one that simply said we were thinking of him and were there for him. Cards should say what we really mean like "this sucks" or "I hate funerals"

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Val, I can't believe you actually made me laugh on this board...the Applebee's sentiment was priceless. I think we're on to something, everyone...

I agree that the outpouring of love and support is so important at those times...I guess I just look at it all so differently now...

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