Part 3

[pewjumper]

Mom had her third cycle of chemo today. Only one more to go. I am expecting the symptoms to intensify for the next several weeks, but I must say that it has not been bad at all.

She had a nurse practitioner who she saw today and we were both very unimpressed. This woman seemed so matter of fact and offered no support whatsoever. Mom's regular oncologist, on the other hand, was just on our local news last night doing a piece about how he shares his faith with patients. He is very positive, reassuring, and caring. It wasn't a pleasant experience today when we received the exact opposite from this lady.

Mom is scared that after chemo is over, she won't be doing anything to fight the cancer anymore and that it will leave the door open for it to come back. I know I've heard many of you describe this fear. Some insight would be wonderful. She doesn't join this forum, I think it's because she feels like it's a place to support me (though I told her there's plenty to go around). But I do share almost every post with her.

Ok, I'm done blabbing. It's been a wild day on a wild ride, and I'm just not going to question it anymore - I choose to believe she'll be just fine.

Mitchell

[RandyW]

What ot do when treratment is over. Go out, celebrate, Take a Class, Go for walks, DO WHATEVER YOU FEEL LIKE DOING. If something happens and you do not feel well call the onc. Have fun and live life like a great day. That is what we did when Deb felt up to it. She painted, worked in the garden, Cleaned the house, had her own car and even tool some painting classes for a while.

Glad you posted. Was wondering about you during prayer time last nite. I say mine at nite under the stars so God hears me with no roof over my head. ANd I Talk to Deb couse I think she listens to me at nite and I sleep better. Glad all is going ok.

I think maybe your Nurse may just be a little too much , By the books, kind of galMay be having a bad day and just not feel good. Just a thought though.

Sending prayers, Glad all is ok

[Geri]

Sometimes it can be as scary when tx is finished as it was before it began. Before it starts there's a fear of the unkown, after it's the fear of nothing being done "in case".......something is in there growing I just know it!

Your Mom's fears are very rational to a cancer patient, we've all had them and they do lesson over time. As for the nurse, put that down to a bad experience and think about more pleasant things. You like the dr and presumably the rest of the nursing staff so concentrate on those feelings and write of the miserable one.

My very best to your Mom, she has a wonderful support sytem in place - YOU.

Geri

[trish2418]

Mitchell, your mom will be scheduled for scans frequently after treatment ends. If anything is growing, it will be caught early. After chemo is finished, many of us begin taking Tarceva, a once-a-day pill, with great success. Your mom might want to talk to her doctor about that at her next visit.

Take care and I hope your mom's remaining treatment goes smoothly for her.

Trish

[Tom K]

I know the fear she faces that she won’t be fighting "it" any longer. I responded to that fear by doing a lot of research and putting together a regime of supplements and vitamins I take. Others on this site helped me refine that regime, so don't be afraid to ask if your mom is interested in supplements. I told my doctor what I was taking and he was non-committal as to whether or not any of it would actually help. But he felt none of it would hurt. At the very least, each morning and evening when I am taking my supps, it makes me feel I am doing something to keep “it” from coming back.

[Snowflake]

Well, she's right, it MAY come back - but it may not. ANY time spent worrying about it coming back is time wasted, there are better things to worry about, like what to do to reconcile with life. Plant a garden, take a walk, dance in the rain... I have found that the very feel of a warm rain on my face is rejuvenating and I don't carry an umbrella in the spring. Of course, my curly hair is the "wash and wear" variety, too...

Don't think about that other shoe dropping, it may never fall and you are torturing yourself. Whether you live one more minute, one more day, one more week, or one more decade, that lifetime needs to be filled with LIFE. Get out there and LIVE IT.

[mary colleen]

Mitchell, I understand - we are just a few weeks ahead of you and your Mom in finishing chemo. It is kind of disorienting and unnerving to suddenly be doing nothing in this fight, no matter how tough the fight itself has been during surgery and treatment.

I decided that we again have to find another "new normal" - a way to move forward in a normal way, partly disregarding the illness and partly remaining vigilant.

Tell your Mom we are proud of her and behind her. I think of her often.

[blaze100]

Hi Mitchell, This is a scary time for your Mom. There are antidepressants to help. There is no cure I know of for the fear, except it will eventually decrease over time.

Sounds like your Mom has a good doctor there. Plus she had clean margins and is doing the chemo to clear up anything left behind. No doubt her doctor will be ordering up scans to follow up on a regular basis so even if it comes back, they can catch it early when it is small.

Prayers for you and your Mom,

Barb

[barbara5452]

Mitchell, we all understand your mom's fears, I believe once cancer has been spoken to you it and its fears never leave, we may not talk about them but in the back of our minds its always there. As for the uncaring nurse, I always give the benefit of doubt, we never know what is going on in someone elses life and may be she was having an off day. Prayers your way, your mom is lucky to have a son like you....