cthomas Posted April 20, 2007 Share Posted April 20, 2007 hello, I just foun out that my father has stage four lung cancer . he lives by him self in a rural area in texas about 70 miles from austin. and I live in san francisco ca. he hasn't started any treatment yet . does anyone have advice for dealing with this process from another state? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karenlaureti Posted April 20, 2007 Share Posted April 20, 2007 Hi, I am so sorry you have deal with this. Is there nobody out there with him? I can't imagine not having someone there while you are going through that. Could he come near you? My parents are far from me, and my Dad has SCLC, but I have a sister out with them also. Make sure that he has a Big University hospital he is dealing with so that you get the best care! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted April 20, 2007 Share Posted April 20, 2007 Does your dad have any friends or faith community he can call on to help him through this? He will need a lot of physical and emotional support. It is important for someone to go with him to doctor's visits, tests, treatments, etc. This is not a time for him to be alone. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don M Posted April 20, 2007 Share Posted April 20, 2007 Hi: You are in a tough situation. I guess there is no avoiding the fact that sooner or later your dad will need to have someone drive him in for treatment. I managed to drive myself back and forth for all my chemo and I did well at gathering information and learning about my treatment, but I absolutely HAD to have a driver for my bronchoscopys. I was lucky in that I tolerated my chemo well and could drive with no problem. But, I did not have to drive 70 miles. I drove 25 miles. There may be occasions where your dad will HAVE to have someone drive him in for chemo. If there is someone in your dad's community who can help in driving and be a contact that your dad feels comfortable with, that will make things go a lot smoother. You could also ask your dad to sign a document to make you able to gather and view all his medical records so that you can track his treatments and scans and such. Whenever he has an appointment or a scan, he could ask the provider to send you a copy. If your dad has a computer and is comfortable using it, that will go a long way to providing support. He could go to a site such as this and you and he could contact each other on an everyday basis if you want and discuss treatment. I have a computer with fax capability. Whenever I have a scan or a treatment, I have a copy of the report faxed to me. I get the reports the same time as the provider. If you can make a trip to see your dad and help get him setup, now would be the best time. It is especially stressful and overwhelming for many when you get the initial diagnosis. Once a treatment routine is setup, it becomes more manageable and less overwhelming. Good luck to you and your dad. Don M Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillise Posted April 20, 2007 Share Posted April 20, 2007 I'm gald you have found us. Everyone here has been very helpful. My mother also has stage IV NSCLC. She is is NC and I'm in Alabama. She is not alone as my father is with her, but I feel like much of the understanding and knowledge of this disease has fallen on me. The first thing is to make sure that someone goes with him when he sees the Dr. If he is a member of a church see if they have a Parrish Nurse program or even a retired nurse or Dr. Who will accompany him. I know that when I have gone with my mom to the oncologist we've heard very different things. Second--if at all possible, try to be with him as he starts his treatment. It has helped a lot that I was with Mom when she first saw the oncologist. We swapped business cards and he has told me to feel free to call if I need to. I have and it has helped. For the trip where they discussed her chemo I couldn't be there, but I sent a list of questions for her to give to the Dr. He was very good about answering them. Other than that, I just spend alot of time on the phone with her. The week she has a chemo I call every day. The weeks in between (when she generally feels pretty good)I try to call every 2-3 days. Are there any other friends or family members close by? It will help you a lot to know that there are people he can depend on. Still, nothing substites for seeing for yourself. I was with my mom when she was diagnosed and a month later-right after she completed her radiation, but did not see her until after she had taken her second round of chemo. I knew she had lost her hair, and knew she was experiencing tiredness and soreness, but I was so worried. Now that I have seen her and have seen for myself that she is really coping well, I am a lot more relaxed. I'm thinking that I will be using all my vacation time this year for trips home, but that's ok because I want to make sure she is doing well. It's very frightening when it's all new. After awhile you learn to live and deal with the fear. It isn't every pelasant, but you learn to do what you need to handle it. Susan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ernrol Posted April 21, 2007 Share Posted April 21, 2007 Your dad could go to M.D. Anderson in Houston for a second opinion. This is one of the top cancer centers. I would give them a call and see what they have to say. He will need some local support. Stay positive, Ernie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barbaraSanAntone Posted April 22, 2007 Share Posted April 22, 2007 Hi, sounds like your dad lives in the hill country, great place. If he is 70 miles from Austin, the University of Texas is right there with fantastic medical facilities. They have UTMB hospitals all over Texas (I am here in San Antonio). The hospitals have social services that can be very helpful, and may be able to help or guide you as to what you can do. God bless you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flowergirlie Posted April 22, 2007 Share Posted April 22, 2007 Just wanted to say welcome. I think it is a good idea also to go and help him get set up if he is going to be staying in Texas. It will become more and more imortant for you to have access to what is going on with treatment plans, scans and any other information that may arise. At least if you go and see what is going on, what is offered and available as resources to help your dad, it will help both of you feel more comfortable. Best to you and your dad. We are all here for you. Flowergirlie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyr Posted April 23, 2007 Share Posted April 23, 2007 Hi, just wanted to add my Welcome to you. Glad you've found us and as you've already seen, there is a wealth of information and support here. MD Anderson is major cancer center & I highly recommend it, if only for a second opinion. Your Dad will definitely need a good support group around him & you've already been given excellent advice re that so I can't add much more other than to give you a very warm welcome. Good Luck & God Bless wendyr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.