Dad's condition is worsening

[wendyr]

Hi Yvette: I think it's way too soon to throw in the towel. My hubby has been on tarceva since the end of Dec/06 & as of his last scan 6 weeks ago he was stable. No shrinkage but no progression either. We get the results of Monday's scan tomorrow & I'll post the results. He has never had a rash but he has had major issues with diarrhea. I think most oncologists now say that there is no corelation between the rash & tarceva's effectiveness. Please hang in there and give it time. Good Luck & God Bless

wendyr

[yvetten]

I just got off the phone with my Mom and she was sobbing I feel horrible for her and for me also, of course. Dad is very depressed, she said. She said he told her that she is the only one with hope still. I feel awful to be hearing this. I know I should act more hopeful around my Dad but I am very realistic about this whole thing and maybe I give off the vibe that I have given up on my Dad.

I told my Mom I was worried about her because she has unrealistic expectations, but she said she does not-- she said "I'm no dummy, I know the reality, but I am trying to stay hopeful and positive for your Dad." She asked me to change my attitude a bit around him so he is not constantly reminded he is dying.

This is just awful . . . on top of dealing with the prospect of losing my Dad, I now feel horrible for making him feel this way. I feel like I have been so self-absorbed I haven't stopped to consider his feelings in this -- as the one with the terminal illness. It must be so hard . . . I can't imagine.

Anyway, I am going over there tonight to see if I can spend some quality time with Dad.

[dtay]

Hi Yvette - dont be hard on yourself, you are doing brilliantly and I'm sure your Dad agrees.

Dawn x