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Hello everyone - New to it all!


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I found you guys a couple of weeks ago and have been reading...you all sound so great and supportive...

it is just so sad to meet under such circumstances.My husband was dx'd in March '07 Stage IV NSCLC. But I will back up.. he had pain in his back and felt ill/tired starting in Dec '06. His primary wasnt available and his collegue said it was probably a kidney stone and prescribed antibiotics and pain relievers. Nothing ever passed but the pain eventually went away... he still felt generally ill and tired. In February, he went back complaining of a dry cough and general illness.. again we got the antibiotic "brush off"...saying it was probably a sinus "thing". I knew it was more than that! He took the medicine the Dr prescribed and started coughing up blood and didnt get better...decided to have a complete physical... told Dr of blood and they wanted him in right away. Did chest Xray.. complete white out of right lung!! By this time he was very SOB... lots of trouble getting through ER... had 2 liters of fluid drained March 2. CT scan done...showed signs of cancer. Admitted to hospital March 14 to drain pleural effusion and do thoradesis. Another 3-4 liters drained at that time..lung was totally collapsed.. had to get opened to do talc... ended up going home with chest tube..

officially told of cancer 3/17... nodules in left lung, tumor in right... ct scan showed bone mets.

Tumor in right lung blocking air from fully opening right lung... under went radiation to tumor to shrink.. went to 8 of 10 appts...he was supposed to go every day for 2 weeks but felt so ill at times it took 3 weeks to do 8 treatments...Onc said that lung sounded clear and to check it out may not have to finish radiation. Tube fell out last week had to go to ER... they couldnt get tube back in without making new track... his Dr came down...looked at xray and said that lung still wasnt opened even after 6 weeks so still couldnt do talc... decided to leave tube out and hope fluid doesnt build up quickly...he is supposed to start chemo tomorrow...they couldnt do it with the tube in...but he is pretty weak and doesnt eat much...or drink much...not sure if he has energy or desire to go through it....

As for me...Fortunately my employer is letting me work at home during this time. This has been a great help to me. It is all just a struggle though..life goes on no matter what along with all of this...sometimes I would like to take a week vacation from my whole life but obviously not possible. I have a 14 year old daughter...enough said there!

Sorry if this was a ramble...tried to keep brief...

anyway... everyone here seems really great... it is hard b/c I dont get out much..my only contact with the outside world is thorugh emails for work and a couple of message boards...

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Hi, and welcome here, although I'm sad you have to be...

My name is Nova, and I'm fairly new here too.

I also have a 14 year old.....my son, Jacob.

There are lot's and lot's of extra good folks here, that will do whatever they can to help support you, your husband and your entire family.

It's nice to meet you,


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Hello Snoopy

Welcome to this message board. I say welcome because one day you will most likely welcome all the friends, thoughts, prayers, advice and encouragement from many survivors and caregivers of this ugly disease. I have gotten so much help and sometime just a kind word from someone else who understands. Blessings to you and your family. Keep the faith.


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Welcome! I am sorry you have a need to be here but thank goodness for all the loving support you will receive. Your husband is having such a rough time and I know it is not easy for you. Hang in there. Hopefully your husband will stabilize and start getting better. Let your friends and family help if they offer.

There are many success stories here and I hope your husband will join the club.


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Thank you everyone for your replies....

We are at a crossroads now b/c chemo is/was last/only treatment option. It is not looking good that we will go tomorrow. This means it probably wont happen at all. I am a bit worried right now. He absolutely wont eat and has barely had anything to drink. Just enough to take meds and then 1/2 a beer. His feet are swollen again...he has slept most of the day. There have truly been a lot of ups and downs during the past 7 weeks...unfortunately recently more downs than ups. He does not want contact from anyone really except me. He will tolerate from brother and sisters at times...but never anyone on the phone....

I am glad that many of you have had good results from treatment and outlived what you were originally told. Unfortunately in our case, I think we got a dx way too late and then the delay in starting chemo b/c of the chest tube didnt help... I feel pretty helpless most of the time b/c there isnt much I can do or that he wants me to do.

I dont think I said before...he is only 47....it is hard to see him like this..he had such a big personality and most of it is gone. He is frail and week now.. lost over 50 lbs in 4 months...such a cruel disease. I hope that you who have it have the strength to fight it and strength to the caregivers as well... not an easy position to be in..so much to deal with...

Thank you so much again for all your well wishes!

Nova... I just had to say I thought it was interesting about "Pa"... my daughter calls my father that.... when she was younger that was all she could say...instead of "Grandpa"...so "Pa" stuck!

Rich..how great for you beating all the odds! I certainly wish you continued success..it isgood to hear positive stories....

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Hi Snoop,

Wanted to welcome you and tell you there is hope. I know you are feeling right now that nothing can be done but I just wanted to tell you a little bit about me. I am 43 and last year I nearly died before I even knew I had NSCLC stage 3b. Yes I was that sick. It has been a long road this last year but I wanted to tell you that I am going to try to go back to work in the next few weeks. If you would have said that to my family last year they would have said it was impossible. Just goes to show what determination can do. I still have good days and bad days don't get me wrong and maybe I will never see retirement age but I am going to give it everything I have to aim for that goal. I think your mind has alot to do with how your body acts. Tell that man of yours that the end is not near but he is just going through a tough spot right now. Eating is the most important job he has right now to make himself better. It might be a tough job but he needs to do the best he can. Hey if he does the job real well he might even be over weight in a few short months. That is what happened to me.

Good luck to you and your family


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Welcome to the board and so sorry for what your husband and family are going through right now. :(

As far as weightloss goes...it's not always a determining factor, though I know it's crazy-scary to see such weightloss. My mom, throughout her treatments (over two years) has lost almost 120 lbs and now is at 125 lbs on a 5'10" frame. She has eaten approximately half a banana a day for the past three months or so...and she's still here. Her treatments never quite went as expected, either, either missing them or delaying them were common things. But, she's well past what "they" told her she'd see and determined to continue as long as she can.

Do you think your husband might be helped by an antidepressant? That helped Mom the most when she was having the hardest time dealing with all of this...and has helped us out with all of it, too.

I really wish I could be of more help, so please, let me (us) know how we can support you!

Much love and many prayers...

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Snoopy--Welcome. You've found a loving, helpful and hopefull group.

Don't give up hope yet. If you can get some chemo going you might see tremendous progress. I know that it is awfully hard--on you and your daughter as well as on him.

We'll be here for you,


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Welcome to the board even under the circumstances. You will find this all very helpful - especially as you research the disease. I found alot of information on this site by researching common traits of others and my husbands. Best of luck with everything.


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thank you all again so very much.. the ups and downs of this are crazy!

After he got fluids in the hospital and the chest tube out..I was hopeful to begin chemo...I thought..if we could just get to that... maybe there will be a chance of some improvement/turn around.

The appt was today... he wasnt up to going but I can at least still tell he hasnt given up on going...he does want to speak to the onc. So we will see...

He is doing better again today right now and even ate a little bit.

He was actually overweight to start out with so the 50+ lbs he lost actually put him "on paper" at a healthier weight. He is 6'2" and is about 205 probably right now....you can def tell though the disease has taken his muscles first...he doesnt move or walk a lot so his legs and arms have gotten really thin....

I am glad to hear of stories of encouragement...that is so great Sherry that you are able to go back to work... I know he would love to do that and anything that would be construed as "normal"...help around the house etc...

yes I totally believe your mind has a lot to do with it...to have that "fighting spirit" is something that he is lacking and I wish would develop...

Thanks so much everyone! you are all great!

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Hi Snoopy: I just wanted t welcome you and to day that in my opinion, it is never too late to do chemo as long as the person is willing and wants to fight and has the strength to get through it.

I hope your husband gets some strength and appetite and can go on to chemo.

Don M

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