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Progression and radiation, watching is so painful.

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Well I havent done alot of posting latley, but read daily.

MIL is taking radiation (which has almost no side effects, the radio onc told her) trying to reduce a very painful tumor. We have changed pain meds to oral morphine (2 types) shes getting so weak, no appitite, having trouble hearing her on the phone now too. Told me today she feels worse now than when she took the chemo (and that was the strongest dose they give) we've got anxiety attacks to boot. Cant sleep thru the night for the pain.........

I just wish I could take this away. Watching her just slowly wither. Cant even unload the full tray of silverware from a dishwasher with out sitting down to rest.

Being the families advocate (they always want me there and the knowledge I have gained thru studing this) I have the task now of letting them know we need to prepare ourselves. The famly never was good at communication, (my gift or curse in life) and they simply dont talk. Dont get me wrong they love each other, fight to the end for each other, but ......

Trying to keep a positive and steady keel while realizing it is time to prepare. We may have months......we may hav just one or two???? Maybe less?. Maybe its just a spell..........maybe it will all go away when we wake up from this nightmare.

Watching her in pain, nine months now,.......rips my heart. I've prepared for the future, went to Hospice meetings learned their procedures to be ready for it IF we ever needed it...... I wanted to make the transition better for everyone I love so much, yet I dont know I will suceed. Who can take this burden from another? Who can humanly prepare for the pain and morning. I learned about 5 months into this I couldnt fight her cancer, I couldnt impose my strong alternative belifes on an unwilling person, that I didnt have her cancer. Now I have the realzation I cant carry this for the family either. My husband wants to deny it all away. When I softly and gently explain things he listens, but I watch his leg or foot begin to shake, he gets uneasy. ........

Sorry......back to the radiation issue. If Radiation hasnt horrible side effects then the progression we learned of in the last 2 months is taking over, slowly and painfully. Anyone have some thoughts on radiation and extreme fatigue, weakness, voice loss and loss of appitite?

Thanks for the space here to ramble, sorry about that........

Beat it...........feeling beat today.

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I had palliative radiation to my hip over a two week time period. It made me exhausted. I fell asleep sitting on a couch at my husband's grandmother's house - a place where I don't feel entirely comfortable and would never have done that if I wasn't so tired. I also had to force myself to eat. Had no appetite at all. This was during a period where I was relatively stable cancer-wise. So, I guess some of her appetite and fatigue could be radiation related. I don't know about the other symptoms - my radiation was nowhere near my chest, so that may be different. Best wishes for your MIL to get some pain relief and sleep and for your whole family.


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Radiation kicked Mom's butt too. Really tired and sleeping lots. No appetite, some hearing loss in left ear (the side the radiation on), food tasted bad. And don't forget the terrible blisters that went all the way around her neck. Also had a burning sensation to the skin and the left shoulder--like inside.

My theory is that since we can't "see" the radiation like we can the chemo, we don't associate it with such bad side effects. But it was bad and it got better.

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I'm so sorry your MIl is not doing well and that you are left to support everyone. You must be strong and caring women. My dad went through 38 rounds of radiation on his chest. He did seem more tired than normal. He did have some difficulty swallowing, but that seems to have gotten better. Now that he has started WBR almost immediatly after completing the radiation on his chest he is extremely tired!. My dad however didnt' have chemo prior so that may make a difference too. I hope that along with many prayers helps. Hang in there.

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Beat it,

YOu are struggling with some of the same issues I did when my mom was sick. It is so hard to be positive when you see a downhill slide. On one hand, the knowledge you have gained gives you a tadbit of control, but on the other hand, it is devastating to know and watch. All I can say is to keep on keepin on, never give up and always be her advocate. You are doing a fabulous job!

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Radiation keeps working on your body 2 weeks. As you go further into the radiation sessions, the cumulative effect is just exhaustive. I'm a strong woman but radiation knocked me on my butt for sure. I did start to bounce back about 2 weeks after radiation ended. Good luck to your MIL. You're a very special DIL.


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So sorry to hear that your MIL is feeling so poorly. I am praying that her symptoms are just side effects from the radiation and are not being caused by the cancer itself.

Your family is going to need your strength and compassion now so hang in there and stay strong.

God Bless,


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