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How often do you.....


Connie B

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Keep things from your Caregiver? Such as your fear of death or maybe your fear of treatments? Or just and over all of how you feel being the one with cancer?

How often do you as a LC Survivor try to keep things from your family/caregiver members as to not hurt them? If you do this,then who do you talk to about your thoughts and feels with? Or do you feel you just hold alot of your feelings in?

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I keep nothing from Fred. He would know anyhow. Makes us more of a team and closer than ever. Sometimes I feel badly......especially in the fall of '04 when I was told I would die VERY soon. I could hardly stand looking at his face ~ all the worry and stress. I could NOT, however, keep him out. Sometimes I wish I had the ability to do that, but he is my rock!

Kasey

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I do not hold back anything with my family and friends. I'm not really worried about dying (don't plan on it anytime soon) but rather how it all plays out in the end and affects the ones that I love and matter the most to me. I fear the unknown, as long as I know I can deal with things. I view having lung cancer (not really an issue I have it) the same way I view my other health issues--no really big issues and treat it like it is a chronic disease. Like Don I do not need a caregiver per say but do need help doing somethings and slowing down some what after 63 months. Could always be worse is the way I look at it.

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My wife Rina insists on going with me to most of my check-ups. She is a fully involved partner in this fight. At times she has played the role of head coach and other times she has been the cheerleader. We have pretty much discussed everything including my fear of unresolved pain. I don’t know who this quote is from, but it sums up my thoughts about dying. It goes; “I don’t mind dying; I just don’t want to be there when it happens”. Rina knows that if I am in a great deal of pain I would rather be sedated into oblivion than suffering in agony. My kids never wanted to discuss the details, in fact my daughter once told me that I was “superman” in her eyes and she did not want all this cancer talk to destroy that illusion for her. So we never discussed much with them other than telling them the latest test results when the news was good. That is the way they wanted to deal with it, so we respected that and banned cancer from the dinner table.

However, my parents are still totally unaware I had cancer. They live in northern PA and can not travel because of their own health problems. My sister passed away 1 year before I was diagnosed and I saw no reason to have my folks worry about me when there was nothing they could do about it. I am in trouble with them for not having been up for a visit in more than 2 years, so we were planning a visit next month for my dads 81st birthday.

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For me, I use this site to voice my concerns, my son has his head in the sand, and my sister is so senative and is such worrier about everything, my daughter will listen and lend a shoulder and my husband is always so positive that I feel I can't talk to him too much because he thinks I worry too much. Thank God for this site......Heaven sent it is...

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