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Mom Has Lost Contro of Bodily Functions


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Hello All, It hs been awhile since I have posted about our situation. I think it has to do with the fact that I don't want to revisit this past month.

The first week of Sept. my mom was addmitted to an area hospital. She has been going to UC Davis Med Center but the night she needed to go their ER was closed to more serious conditions, ie gunshot victims.

She spends a week in the hospital for severe constipation brought on from her medication. She gets plenty of fluids and shots for pneumonia. When she is released she is in Depends. She says it is just temporay because of all of the fluids and stool softerens taht they have gived her. We stop on the way home and buy two bags of Depends thinking it is only tempoary.

One week later she is back at the hospital (UC Davis) because her right lower lung collasped and she has pneumonia. She is still wearing the Depends. Instead of getting my mom up and helping her to the bathroom, which she is right next to, they just have her go on herself and they clean her up later. She is in the hopital for two days.

She comes home and she is still going on herself. At this point she has an in - home nurse who is wondering why this is happening. All of the fluids should be gone at this point. Her nurse calls her doctor who then in turn calls me. We talk for about a half an hour about teh possibilites.

Today my mom has her 4th round of Chemo. She was on Carbo/ Taxol for her first 3 rounds and the tumors have shrunk. The Taxol has really kicked her butt. She has constant numbness in her hands and feet. She can't feel the ground and has difficulty walking.

She just sits in a recliner and does not go out except when she has to go to the Dr's.

She does not want to eat. She is taking Megace though, Thanks Ned for your recommendation. She went from 147 lbs to 100lbs. She was overweight considering she is only 5'2, but such a rapid weaight loss can't be good.

she has been saying more and more that she just wants to die. She feels weak and wombly and no longer has the quality of life taht she enjoyed just 2 short months ago.

While in the hospital at UC. Davis she had several doctors tell her to give up, that the Cancer is winning and maybe Hospice would be better. We know better anh her onc knows better. For once her onc is encouraged because her has seen progress. In the beginning he was was like "I can't promise anything. Maybe you will see Christams 2007 and maybe you won't. We will have to see."

If it were not for teh Cancer, my mom would be in great shape. I know that sounds funny, but it is true. Her breathing is fine, no heart problems, no dieabetes, no high blood preasure,no hearing loss or loss of eysight. One Dr. commented on how healthy her brain is for being 77 years old. My beautiful mother was in picture perfect health, but 69 yers of smoking has brought her to thsi point. My heart breaks and I die a little inside each day.

She has a physical therepist who will be out tomorow to see her. I am in teh process of trying to find a nutritionist to come out to the the house. I don't know what else I can do for her. I want her to keep fighting.

Thank you for listening to me. Hugs to all.

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Well first thing I would do is stop the chemo to give your mom a break and re-group. My understanding is one can miss one or two treatments and it does not change the outcome one way or the other. Seems odd your onc is still giving her treatments with everything going on? One of the side effects of Taxol is Neuropathy, so moms needs to be very (hot baths, stairs etc) careful-- there is B6 and B12 that helps, also Gabapentin (Neurontin) but ask your doctor first. Also need her to eat (even small bites) or try ensure, shakes etc. Hope this helps, prayers for the best.

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Wow - you've got so much weighing on your heart! I am saying a special prayer for vespas's beautiful Mom right now. Are there any favorite meals that she would enjoy?? Or small portion snack type food that can be left within reach for her throughout the day? When the doctors finally found the right combo of anti-nausea/constipation medicine for my Mom, her appetite was so much better......the more she ate the better she felt. My thoughts are with your family.

Be Blessed,


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Hello all, Mom tried vitamin B, but the dose was too low. Her onc. did not want her to take a higher dose. She tried Neurontin but had a horrible reaction to it. She also tried ensure but hated the taste. She is a very stubborn woman! The constipation is now gone, She had round 5 of Chemo a week ago. She doesn't have nausea from it which is great. I'm trying to do things that are in her best intest, but she fights me tooth and nail.

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