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Happy, sad and mad all at once arrrrrggggghhhhh


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My dad just got notice that an apartment will be available to him in about 3 months in the senior housing development in the same town as our church,his friends,his barber and his favorite restaurant. It will be so great for him and it will eliminate alot of driving and make his life so much easier. I am so mad because this should be a move he makes with my mom. They should be enjoying retirement together and because of #*&*^%&* cancer he is alone. Mom doesn't get the chance to enjoy this new place and i am so pissed. I am so sad because we will finally have to clean out her things. Her bedroom is just as she left it on the day she went to the hospital last Sept and now I feel like we will all be moving on and I am so afraid that she will be forgotten. It seems like I miss her more as time goes on. I went to dads to do some house work and laundry for him on Sunday and he wasnt home from church yet so it was the first time since the day of her death that I was alone in the house and all I could do was touch her things and cry. All I can say is ARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH I hate cancer!

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I understand your anger. It's just not fair that your dad has to make this move without your mom.

I also understand your fear about your mom being forgotten. I hate that time continues on since losing my loved one. I feel like time should have stood still, as if each new day takes me further away from him.

But of course this can't be true. Those we have loved so dearly can never be forgotten, no matter what changes happen in our lives, no matter how much time passes. They live forever in our hearts and our memories.

I'm sorry you're hurting. Wishing for peace for you.

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You can do anyhting in the world to amterial items, but the one thing that you will have ther rest of your lives are the wonderful memries of fun times wiht Mom. No one can ever take those away from you...

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Isn't that such a constant thread in our grief?

I am always SO frustrated over the fact that Mom never got to enjoy the fruits of her labors. I SO hear you. And I know that you have the added frustration that that "reward" has also been taken from your dad...

I understand.

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