blueeye Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 Mom has slept all day. I wake her to eat and try to get her to drink something. I guess it's the pain meds. She's on Fentynal patch and Lortab. She cried and moaned all night and now has slept all day since a new patch was put on. I know she's dehydrated but she won't go anywhere. I feel angry because she won't go see anyone to find out WHY she is hurting so bad. (Her oncologist is off this week and it's a darn holiday anyway.) I was rubbing her back last night and there is a hard knot...is it a huge tumor?? I am afraid. I am so sad and feel like I've already lost her. But I don't even know if this is disease progression or mostly from the too high digoxin level and following dehydration. Sorry to ramble. Happy Thanksgiving to you all...I haven't found anything to be thankful for today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilyjohn Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 Oh Hon I understand so well how hard it is. Especially on the holiday when we are to give thanks but don't see anything in our future to be thankful for. I have said often that cancer and Alzhiemers are the two diseases that take a person's life long before they end it. As for the knot in her back it may be just a muscle and I am sure she is having pain but that too could be from a number of things. This disease sucks enough don't borrow trouble. It seems to find you soon enough on it's own. Just do the best you can and even though you feel helpless say a prayer. It may seem like He is not listening but He is. His answer may be slow in coming or it may not be what you want but have faith that He will be there with you no matter what. God Bless you and I pray that things work out alright. It is hard when you have to remember this day as close to the end like I do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted November 23, 2007 Author Share Posted November 23, 2007 Thank you so much for your reply. Last year my Dad was in the hospital and he died only a month later. I can't help but look at her and wonder how much longer? The PT said her back pain could be from a muscle spasm too. She's been guarding that side for a month now since the chest tube was put in. I've already called her onc nurse and gave her a heads up so the doc can check her when she goes in Monday for treatment. Now if I can only get some fluids in her... Her siblings are far away and my only brother is on his way down with his family. I'm leaving her with him tomorrow while I go to work. I'm just so alone. Thank God for this board...hey! there is something I'm thankful for! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 Reading your post brought back so many memories for me... I am so sorry that you are hurting so much right now, and so sorry that your Mom is hurting so much right now. I care, and I'm sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ry Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 I hope today is better. She really needs to drink whatever she can. What about trying Popsicles? Please let us know how she does. Rochelle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 Try to make her drink, or use Popsicles like Ry suggested, pain could be relieved with more fluid. Hard on you but hope tomorrow will be with both of you. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackieA Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 so sorry to hear about your mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sloanie83 Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 I know how you feel. I have felt that way alot. Like you are already greiving and they aren't even gone. I will pray that your mom starts doing better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted November 24, 2007 Author Share Posted November 24, 2007 Today's not better. Her BP is very low. Home Health nurse came out at my request and ended up giving her fluids. Her BP didn't improve any. She still refuses to go to the hospital. We had to leave it up to her...and she said no. The doc on call told me to leave off her BP medicine and lasix and he said that we could get a direct admit (no going thru the ER) and she liked that idea. The nurse is coming back out tomorrow. How can she be so stubborn after all she went thru with my Dad?? I'm sure she won't get treatment Monday and what am I going to do about work? Thank you so much for your replies...I know that you all understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babylove91297 Posted November 24, 2007 Share Posted November 24, 2007 Cancer sucks, there is no doubt about that. I am not a caregiver, I am a survivor...living with my disease. I can tell you that I know how your mom feels, I hate the Er, been there done that. It is really nice that you can forgo that. I will be praying for your mother and for you. Try not to worry to much, and remember to breathe. As for work, my 19 year old daughter is my caregiver right now, she has had to take off a few days from work for me, and they have been great with her. I am sure that they do it because I also work at the same place, but just talk to your employer, I am sure they will understand. Bobbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janehill Posted November 24, 2007 Share Posted November 24, 2007 Hey, here's what worked for my mom. I used a dropper (the kind used for giving children medication) and would fill it with Gatorade (I didn't give her just plain water because she was drinking so little that I wanted her to get the advantage of electrolytes as well). It takes a long time and can be a tiresome process but it works. She was having such trouble swallowing so I would sit her up really well (she had a hospital bed so I would just set it to a sitting position) and it would take about ten minutes to get a fair amount into her - maybe 1/2 cup. Well worth it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted November 24, 2007 Author Share Posted November 24, 2007 Well she finally agreed to go to the hospital. We struggled really bad to get her to and from the bathroom this morning. I got her to realize we can't handle this alone--not knowing what all is going on. Once we find out, we'll deal with it and have the proper help and equipment. Her skin on her bottom had also broken down--that is what really pushed her to go. She knows that can get serious fast. We got a direct admit right up to the room. The doc showed up a few hours later and when I left to come home and feed the critters we were waiting on lab results but they had hung fluids. Thank you so much for all of your replies and prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MsC1210 Posted November 24, 2007 Share Posted November 24, 2007 I am glad your Mom agreed to go to the hospital. Sending many prayers that things will improve now. Keep us posted. Warmly. Christine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nova Posted November 24, 2007 Share Posted November 24, 2007 I'm praying that the fluids help your Mom feel better quickly. We've been thru that with Harry too.. he would be SO sick, and the re-hydration would perk him back up. I'm glad they will be able to treat her bed sores too. Those can get bad really quickly. Saying lot's of prayers for you guys, Nova Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandyswa Posted November 25, 2007 Share Posted November 25, 2007 If your mom is having a hard time with fluids at home, I would ask the Dr about home health doing Hydration therapy at home. We have been doing it with my grandpa 2times a week. Home health comes on Fridays puts the iv in and we leave it in and on monday do a second bag of saline, take the iv out and start again on Friday. It has helped soo much. Hes appiate has gotten better and he can actual feel better. just an idea for fluids Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teriw Posted November 25, 2007 Share Posted November 25, 2007 I'm so sorry for all that you're going through, and I understand why you feel like you're grieving -- you are. You're grieving what life was like when your mom was healthy, you're grieving for her loss of quality of life, etc. That's so understandable. Dehydration can cause so many problems -- I hope and pray that the hospital stay will give your mom some much needed fluids, and make her feel better. Be sure that they check her mouth for thrush infection. That can cause a lot of pain and make everything taste horrible. Hang in there, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 Thanks again guys for the encouraging words. She is doing about the same. Her oncologist came back today and made some changes on her meds. They rehydrated her and now she has too much fluid. Waiting on the kidneys to kick in...the lasix didn't work too well. Her BP is still so low and it's almost like even small annoyances hurt her really bad. I'm confused about that one. Her pressure sock was twisted yesterday and I could tell she was moaning and uncomfortable. When I asked her what was wrong she said her foot and when I took the socks off (they're too big now anyway) she was better and rested easier. Thanks Teri, I'll ask about the thrush. She can still get it so long after radiation? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maryanne Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Thanks for keeping us posted. I pray for her to start feeling better. I am glad she is in the hospital getting the attention she needs but I feel so bad that she is uncomforable. Once they get those fliuds drained she should feel much better as the fluids slow down lungs, heart rates etc. I know you will keep us posted. We are here for you. Maryanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jnl1215 Posted December 4, 2007 Share Posted December 4, 2007 Has anyone said anything to you about hospice....The people are great....They also have long term centers,that they can recooperate so when your at work you'll know shes being taken care of....just a thought ....If I could help you in any way, let me know.....I went through all of this with my mom ...every chemo , radiation, doctors visits....They also have a lgfg (look good feel good) at most cancer centers...they meet once a month and do makeup wigs and stuff to make them feel good about themselves...my mom enjoyed it...www.lookgoodfeelbetter.org I wish you the very best laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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