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44 days. Beginning to end. Unreal.


SarahUK

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I posted here back in Nov when we got the word mum had got aggressive lung/liver cancer.

44 days later she died.

16 days after that and we had her funeral.

2 days later and I still can not comprehend it.

I'm 29, mum was 65.

How is life supposed to continue exactly?

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I wish I had the right words to say...my dad was 64 when he died and I had just turned 30...so I understand.

Life goes on in a different way. You must still be shocked. This is so new for you.

It will be so hard and so foreign, but in their honor and with warm memories of those we loved and lost, we make it thru a moment at a time.

We are here for you, and we do understand. Keep talking...it really does help.

I'm so sorry for your great loss.

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I am so very sorry for your loss. It is just unbelievable and scary that her battle was so short. My 52 year young mom passed away 9 months into her battle. I had just turned 30. There was so much more I wanted to share with her. I feel like I was just getting to know her on a different level. I am so sorry. I know it is so very hard. It is hard to imagine going through life without being able to share things with your mom, but know she is with you in spirit always.

Jill

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I am sorry you lost your mom -- I can't imagine going through this so fast without time to even process things. All I can offer for advice is to keep busy, keep going and try to make something positive come from her death-- give to a charity or do something in her name so she is remembered. My condolences.

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44 days is fast. I'm 28, tomorrow will be 10 weeks since my wonderful father died (67). We knew for six months.

I don't know how we go on, but we do. Sometimes (daily, actaully) the thought of what has happened to dad, his sudden sickness, his freefall decline, his death, his absence---it occurs to me and it takes my breath away. Shocks me as if it had just happened. Sometimes I see it coming and I turn away from it---a form of denial. And I know when I do that I'm pushing something down that someday I will have to address. Othertimes, I sob, other times cry just a bit. My mom and my sister and I talk about him everyday. I have dreams about him, as I did last night. I become used to the fact that this is part of the new, new normal.

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Sarah,

My sympathy to you. This was very fast and I too understand losing a Mother young. I was 27 when I lost my Mother. Jill is right -- you were just starting to relate in a different way as an adult and then those times are gone.

Twenty-three years later, I can say that happy memories have replaced the agony of watching her pain and dealing with her illness (also cancer.) It doesn't seem like it now, as it is too raw for you, but that time will arrive for you too.

Bless you and warm hugs,

Welthy

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44 days is unreal...unfair.

My dad was 53 when he was diagnosed (in November 2006). He passed away less than four months later...long before I had a chance to even come to grips with the fact that he was sick.

He will never walk me down the aisle. He will not get to see his grandchildren grow up or enjoy the retirement he worked his whole life for. Those are things that haunt me still...and probably always will.

I still can't believe all of this is real, almost a year later.

I don't know how you move on...I guess you just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

I know that for me, I have found a way to be thankful that my dad's battle was short and he did not have to languish or suffer...and that is what he would have wanted. He is at peace now, and cancer free...just like your mom.

I am terribly sorry for your loss.

-s.

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Sarah,

I'm so sorry. That is an extremely quick timeframe. You must be in shock and wondering if it's all real.

My step kids are ages 22 and 25; their dad, my Bill, was just to turn 55 when we lost him in July. He was bigger than life to them. They loved him so much. They're doing as well as they can be. They both handle it very differently from one another. But I think they both hold on tight to their friends and family and God, and take it one day at a time (which is pretty much what I do).

Much love to you,

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I am so sorry for your loss. My Mom as 67 and I am 34. She was my age when she had me. My father died last December--not cancer but still awful. I think that StephanieJane said it best saying that she is thankful that her father's battle was short.

But we all say that we don't know HOW we go on, but we do. Honor her and cherish her memory in any and every way that you can.

My thoughts are with you.

--Leslie

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Sarah,

So very sorry to read about your loss.

I can't imagine your pain right now.

I do know that you will cope as we are all much stronger than we believe. Take it slowly, allow yourself to be upset/angry and accept help and support.

Remember your wonderful mum often for the happier times you shared.

God bless you

Wishing you and your family strength & peace

Debbie

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I am so sorry for your loss. We no sooner wrap our brain around the "C" word and then all of a sudden the person we love more than life itself is gone. That was way too quick, but at the same time it was better for her not to go to day 45 or 46 or 47. She is at peace and in a place where cancer does not exist. My mom was told that she had stage 4 lung cancer the end of June 2007 and died Nov. 9th 2007.Way too quick, but she is not suffering and that is what helps me get up in the morning and start each day. You were her baby and you carry her memory and because of that she still lives on. Big hugs to you and your family.

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Sorry for your loss.I know how you feel I lost my mother to lung cancer in 2007,she was only 50,my father inlaw in 02,and now my mother in law was dx in aug07 stage 4,she is living with us she is doing so much better than my mom did ,we go to find out her cat scan results on friday.I hope it is good news.

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