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stingy with my dreams


KatieB

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Ok,

this is kind of retarded but I wanted to share and see if there is anyone out there who might understand....(probably not!)

My siblings keep talking about dreams of mom that they have had and "meanings" and "signs" that they get, etc... They've done this since the day after my mom's funeral.

One sibling always trying to out-do another with a grander dream or a bigger sign....games- they just like to play games....

Now, if you know my history you will know that I don't talk to my siblings anymore because of many not very nice things they have done since my mom passed away- but somehow that random e-mail still gets sent to me and in it they go on and on about dreams and what they mean... I got one today.

One sibling talks about dreaming of having lunch with mom and how "glorious" it was that they were together and that it was a "sign"

Another sibling talked about a dream in which both of MY parents said what he was doing was "the right thing to have done"....hmmmm....

At the end of this long e-mail thread, another siblings writes, "be sure to tell us if you have a dream about mom or dad...this is their sign to us and a way to keep them close"

BULL. I'm thinking their dreams are a product of their guilty subconscious.

I've had some wonderful dreams....and I choose to keep them to myself. I don't think they are signs, and I don't think they have anything to do with anyone else, but they do comfort me....and they are mine. I rarely even mention having them.

I simply hit the delete button and it disappeared.

I don't wanna share.

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:( I wanna have dreams of my parents where they are healthy and happy!! I have only had dreams of my dog that died in December.

But I agree...keep your dreams to yourself if they have hurt you that much. I'm sure they are beautiful and private and make YOU feel good.

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JC- but as soon as

somebody talks about a dream

somebody else try to interpret

it.......rather keep to myself

the joy or sometimes the pain

I get from them.

YES!! Absoultely Jackie, me too.

Nick C- Selfishly want mom all to myself in some way I guess.

Yep. I agree with that too!

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I do like to share sometimes good dreams with others but not always though. Do not ahve many any more but they are private and special to me!

I think sometimes it may be like the old adage of a guys locker room. THe more you brag the less it is really happening.

Hugs and Prayers Katie!!

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You should hit reply and say "My dreams, I don't want to share" and let them figure out what you mean. Ha, just kidding. I think you did the right thing and I am sure their dreams are not nighttime dreams, b ut day dreams they dreamed up to outdo each other.

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((Katie)),

I don't know if you remember, but my family went through the same huge rift after the death of my last parent too. Don't let this stuff torment you, but don't burn any bridges either. They are baiting you and you've risen above it. Good for you!

The delete key goes a long way! :D

Enjoy and savor your dreams. Maybe someday there will be a happy ending for your family relations.

Welthy

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Katie,

I just get so mad when I read about your siblings. It does sound like they are rewriting history and waxing poetic about their wonderful lives with your parents. I know it gives you no comfort to know it's just the opposite - it hurts. I'm just so sorry you don't have them to turn to in your sadness and to share your feelings with.

Yet...God bless the delete button.

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I think in many cases (particularly when a questionable action has occurred), someone would certainly interpret a dream to make themselves "right" in their own eyes, or someone else's. Or make someone else wrong.

After what you've shared about your situation Katie, I wouldn't share any dreams with them either!

Kasey, the wonderful British word you're looking for is BOLLOCKS!

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Hey Katie,

Well, I HAD to share a dream I had just last night.... Daddy came to me and told me he loved me the BEST... more than either my brother or sister... He wanted me to know he was only watching out for me, cos I am the only one in the world he cares about.... Oh wait... B O L L O C K S (in Teri's words) My point being, the are full of it...they are trying to hurt you - and I believe they haven't had ANY dream near the ones they are describing to you.... You did the right thing by not responding... they were hoping to get you aggravated and you simply hit DELETE, GOOD GIRL!!! You know the truth honey and that is all that matters!!!

Keep your dreams close to your heart...

Love, Sharon XX

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I also think dreams are for you and your sibling do have a gulity complex about something. I dont have any siblings but my own mother (who did not raise me, my grandma did) she pulls the same stuff and she has a big gulity consciene about all the things she did wrong. I know she makes up half of it. My reply is what did you do wrong for her to haunt you like that!!!

Katie, your doing the right thing..enjoy your dreams and keep deleting.

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  • 2 weeks later...

My family beyond my roof, like yours, has fallen away.

I think for me too, the time has come for these things to be private. When I first lost them I shared everything. Now after almost 4 years with dad and 2 years with mom only those I trust with such things would hear of my dreams. Those people are so few that I find myself keeping it to myself. They are gifts from myself to me. I think my mind gives me dreams when I my heart can't take the pain of missing them anymore.

My brother finds meaning in everything. I think he is much like your family, guilt and denial fueled by regret.

Delete delete delete.

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