lullabelle21302 Posted February 8, 2008 Share Posted February 8, 2008 SORRY I HAVENT POSTED IN AWHILE, SO MUCH HAS BEEN GOING ON. WE FOUND OUT LAST WEEK THAT METS HAD RETURNED TO MOM'S BRAIN AND THAT LAST JUNE/JULY WHEN THEY DONT FULL BRAIN RADIATION FOR THE ONE TUMOR, WELL EVIDENTLY IT DIDNT GET IT CAUSE THAT ONE IS BACK AND IS TRIPLED IN SIZE AND THERE IS SEVERAL MORE. WE WERE ALSO TOLD THEY COULD NOT DO MORE RADIATION BECAUSE IT WOULD DO MORE HARM THAN GOOD. WE DONT KNOW HOW LONG MOM HAS BUT WE HAVE ALREADY CALLED IN HOSPICE AND THE LADY WE SPOKE WITH SAID SHE HAS HAD PATIENCE IN HOSPICE FOR 2 YEARS. SHE GAVE US PAPERS FOR MYSELF AND MY BROTHER TO READ CAUSE WE ARE HER MPOA. AND I LET HIM TAKE THEM. I COULDNT BRING MYSELF TO READ WHAT THE SIGNS WOULD BE AT THE FINAL STAGES, MY BROTHER COULDNT EITHER. SHE DOESNT WANT ANYONE COMING IN AND BATHING HER WHICH I UNDERSTAND SO WE DO THAT AND SHE IS HAVEING A REALLY HARD TIME WALKING AND CANNOT GET AROUND BY HERSELF AT ALL RIGHT NOW. I AM ANGRY, SAD, CONFUSED AND A WHOLE BUNCH OF OTHER EMOTIONS. I WANT TO MAKE MOM COMFORTABLE AND I WANT HER TO ENJOY THE TIME SHE HAS LEFT. BUT I DO KNOW THAT ONLY THE GOOD LORD UP ABOVE KNOWS WHEN THAT WILL BE. I FEEL LIKE SOMEONE HAS RIPPED OUT MY HEART AND TAKEN MY SOUL. I HAVE BEEN HER CAREGIVER FOR THE PAST 17 MONTHS AND I WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO. WE WERE ALSO TOLD THAT MOM ALREADY OUTLIVED THEIR EXPECTATIONS. WE DID ASK MOM IF SHE WANTED A SECOND OPINION AND SHE SAID NO. I KNOW THAT ALOT OF YOU HAVE BEEN WHERE I AM AT NOW AND HAVE FELT THE SAME FEELINGS. THE GOOD THING IS MOM IS EATIN AND DRINKING AND GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND IS PRETTY MUCH IN FIGHTING MODE. SHE SAYS SHE AINT LEAVING THIS WORLD YET. I DO AND I DONT WANT TO KNOW WHAT TO LOOK FOR OR WHAT EXPECT WHEN THE TIME IS CLOSE, I GUESS I WANT TO BE PREPARED BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, WELL I DONT KNOW HOW I FEEL ON THE OTHER HAND. IF ANYONE COULD GIVE ME SOME ADVICE GOOD OR BAD I WANT TO HEAR IT. SO PLEASE FEEL FREE TO TELL IT LIKE IT IS TO ME. ALSO AT THIS STAGE WITH NO TREATMENT WHAT IS THE TIME FRAME OF LIFE, I MEAN HOW MUCH TIME DO WE HAVE LEFT WITH HER? PLEASE BE HONEST WITH ME. THANKS SO MUCH RHONDA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted February 9, 2008 Share Posted February 9, 2008 Rhonda, I just wanted to say that I am really sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this. We didn't get to have the help of hospice, but I understand they can be a invaluable source of information and help. I still have many questions, and no answers myself, but my heart goes out to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bev'sSister Posted February 14, 2008 Share Posted February 14, 2008 Hi Rhonda, I certainly know how you are feeling. The important thing is to make sure your Mom is comfortable and that she knows you or someone will be there with her. We didn't have hospice, Beverly died suddenly, but I understand them to be a good way to go. I think it is important for you to read and find out what the signs will be. That way you will be prepared and can offer your Mom the best care you can give her. With my sister, she started getting weaker, and eventually stopped eating. It was soon after that that she passed. I am thankful that I was able to be there. The simple fact is no one knows how long..it could be days, weeeks or months..just be there with her and listen to what she has to say. It is very important to them to be able to "take care of business" while they are still able to. I hope this didn't sound insensitive..I don't mean to be..but it is as truthful and I can be, and I think you need to hear it. Keep us posted on your Mom and I will be praying for you and your family. Love, Bobby Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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