alexan Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 There are days, not many but they are there that I even forget that I have cancer, and I don't know why I feel so guilty that I think that is going to came back, that the clinical trial wont work, is like dont allow myself to feel good & is depressing. Have a good day, thanks to listen hugs bucky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carolhg Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 I had my surgery in July, 2005. My scans have been clean since, yet I still go through the same feeling that you express. I would love to just move on and forget about it or just recognize it as something in my past, but it seems to always be in front of me. Carol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 First of all, I don't think it's Guilt your feeling, but I do think it's the fear of this monster coming back issue that we all live with. We ALL have that FEAR FACTOR built in now! Every little och and pain we get we think CANCER, CANCER, DANGER WILL ROBINSON!! That's our NEW NORMAL LIFE STYLE! Like it or not, that's what our life is all about. In time it gets better, in time we learn to live with it. As for feeling guilty about.... We worked/work very hard to become long/short term lung cancer SURVIVORS, and I don't think any of us should feel guilty for that. This journey is NOT a cake walk and facing possible death is NOTHING I WOULD WISH ON ANYONE or something we should feel guilty over. Do I feel sad that many have lost there battle to this horrible disease? YES, of course I do. But I do not feel guilty that I have beat the cancer and that I can forget about it now and then a day here or a day there that I continue to live. I say prayers for all my family and friends who lost this battle, but I know each and every one of them is CHEERING US ON to BEAT THIS MONSTER! You have worked very hard to get where you are today, embrace it, and enjoy it, Thank the Lord for it, each and every day, but don't ever feel guilty. It's Another Great Day To Be Alive! You go kick some cancer butt on this new trial my friend! GO GET 'EM! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patti B Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 (((((((Bucky)))))) I do understand how you feel - I feel that way myself sometimes. When I see the profiles of others who have been taken by this horrid disease, and see that some of them were taken so quickly, I sometimes feel the "maybe it should have been me" routine; after all, some of the others we have lost were staged lower than me. BUT - and I need to remind myself of this when I am feeling bad, you and I know that not one of our "family" that has ended this journey would want us to feel that way. They would want us to do whatever we need to do to continue living and be with our families. You have beautiful children and grandchildren who need you, who love you so much!! So you go, get in that trial, Bucky. Realize that in doing so, you may be helping all of us to find a cure. You can be our hero!!!! Wishing you strength and happy thoughts!!! Patti B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ursol Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 Bucky, I have days that I forget about the cancer. Don't feel guilty, it is a good thing that you can forget about it, it allows you to live. Enjoy every minute you can. Lilly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shineladysue Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 Bucky, My Mom's oncologist advised her to live her life like she didn't have cancer and not think about it until it was time to meet with him. It's still a very hard thing to do. At present we wait for her PET scan results and it's scary, but if she is NED we won't feel guilty. Every case is different, every patient is different and you shouldn't feel any more guilty than those of us who are walking around and have never had cancer. It is what it is. Enjoy your precious life. Hugs, Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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