RandyW Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean Southerners can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows. If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in the cab of a four-wheel pick-up with a 12-pack of beer and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they live for. You can ask Southerners for directions, but unless you already know the positions of key hills, trees and rocks, you're better off trying to find it yourself. As you are cursing the person driving 15 mph in a 55 mph zone directly in the middle of the road, remember: ALL Southern folks learned to drive on a John Deere, and this is the proper speed and lane position for that vehicle. If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this!", stay out of his way. These are likely the last words he will ever say, or worse still, that you will ever hear. Most Southerners do not use turn signals; they ignore those who do. In fact, if you see a signal blinking on a car with a Southern license plate, you may rest assured that it was already turned on when the car was purchased. If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let alone eating. The wardrobe you always brought out in September can wait until December. If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the most minuscule accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It does not matter if you need anything from the store. It is just something you're supposed to do. Satellite dishes are very popular in the South. When you purchase one, it is positioned directly in front of the house. This is logical, bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the house and should, therefore, be prominently displayed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbb Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 LOVE IT, some of those sound like our part of the country!!!! Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jyoung20 Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamataca Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 I would love to snort indignantly and say those aren't true....but they are! Having lived in MN for 10 winters, I especially agree with the clothing one. Thanks for making me laugh! Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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