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How some things stay the same


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I come here to read and it breaks my heart. I see many whose names are new to me or those I have seen before who are posting in this forum for the first time. So many things change but again so much stays the same.

I read about someone who lost a loved one a day ago or a month ago or even two years or more ago. The times may be different but the feelings are always so much the same. The feeling of loss and being alone. The deep sadness that lives so deep inside and never really goes away. The fear and the the guilt that really doesn't belong to us but seems to be as much a part of grief as anguish is.

I remember each of those things and those times so well. Over 5 years and I don't forget and I know none of you ever will either. Grief becomes a part of each of us. We may go on and laugh again or in some cases I see people who love again. No matter how many changes come about in our lives one thing always remains. The love is still deep inside with the other emotions that may not always surface but are such a part of us that once in a while we can even forget they are there.

Life is always thought of as before or after. It is easy to remember how things were before but hard to imagine that it could have really been like that. When we laugh we do it with a different texture. We laugh harder and we joke and we try to help others through those first days of shock and disbelief. Each of those things seem to be more pronounced. Why? I'm not really sure. I think it is mainly because we have felt so much with the depths of our souls that everything is more intense.

To all of you who have suffered a recent loss or those like myself who are old hands at this now, I just want to say " I get it" and hope that in some small way that can help you.

God bless and help you. It is not easy but life is not easy. If we could never feel love there would never be the pain but what a terrible life this would be without love.

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