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For Those in the Know...Anniversary Question


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Mom and my stepdad's wedding anniversary is quickly approaching. It's also the anniversary of her diagnosis and only 10 days away from the anniversary of her death (she apparently liked the month of May! :roll: )

Do I call my stepdad on their anniversary and wish him a wonderful day? Do I take him to lunch so we can reminisce? What do I do in this situation? I don't want to just not acknowledge that it's their anniversary, but I don't want to hurt him, either.

Thanks...I know there are many who've been in similar situations before.

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My wedding anniversary was last Friday, 5/2. Even though it is almost 4 years (can't believe it) since Earl has died, both of my children and a few friends called to let me know they were thinking about me.

I did not want a big to do, not lunch or dinner or too much reminiscing, too sad. But I truly did appreciate their thoughtfulness, a recognition of a wonderful marriage.

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As one who has gone through both birthdays and diagnosis date since my husband passed away, I'd sure like someone to remember when our anniversary rolls around in August. Play it by ear, because it will be a heartbreaking day (at least for a woman :shock: ). Feel him out to see how he would like to remember the day.

How thoughtful you are Missy!



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I believe a "thinking of you" card and a phone call would be much appreciated. You can always ask him if he'd like company or invite him to talk.

I personally wanted to spend the day by myself, and I actually planned it out to a degree -- I let everyone know that and they respected my wishes.

It's such an individual thing -- you almost have to ask. It's very kind of you to think of him, and I think he'd appreciate knowing that you remember and care about him.

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Maybe you just call, and say, hey, just wanted to check in..see how you were doing.

If he feel slike talking listen. If not, OK.

If he talks and you ask, so what do you have planned for the day...and see what he says. I find it easier to take cues from the other person then guess where they are...

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