Jump to content

[b]Scared[/b]


klooty

Recommended Posts

I am scared beyond belief. How do you know when the end is near? What are some signs that the end is approaching?

My dad was diagnosed in March with lung cancer. He has since done chemo and done radiation. But now he doesn't feel like he can go threw that again. He appears to be emotional drained all the time and there is nothing I or my family can do to help him. These are the toughest days of my life.

In September the doctors graciously laid upon him the burden of knowing that he only has 3-6 months to live. This was devistating news to all of us. We knew it was incurable, we knew there was little chance he'd survive. We hoped, we prayed, that God would save him. That He would send a miracle and save my daddy. But his days seem to be getting glumier and his will seems to be fading. I CAN NOT EVEN IMAGINE what it feels like. It is the most horrible thing in the world to go through.

That is why I come back here. Looking for answers. What can we expect in the final days. Will he be hospitalized? What things will come before the final days are upon us? I am so scared. I don't want to lose my dad but there isn't a blessed thing I can do about it. I know everyone dies sometime. And perhaps his time is coming. We just don't know what to expect.

My prayers and hopes are with all of you people out there going through these terrible times. Whether you are suffering because of this disease or are suffering because your loved one is suffering. It is the hardest thing ever to go through. I commend each and everyone of you and wish you all the best. NEVER GIVE UP!!! NEVER LOSE HOPE!!! YOU ALL MEAN SO MUCH, TO SO MANY!!! please take care...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Klooty:

I am so sorry for you as my son is going through the same feelings about me. He says that he dosn't think he can go on without me. I believe that God has given us this time to prepare ourselves and our loved ones. I also believe that this bond of love will never be broken. We are just on different planes but always loving each other. Death is a natural part of life. It will come to each one of us in one way or another. And I do know that it is only death of this part of our life. We do not die, we just move on.

Please call Hospice, they will help you and your father through this. They have a wonderful support system for all of you, and they are the best and have a lot to offer. The cost is only what Medicare charges and no matter what a Hospice Patient needs it will be delivered to your door. They have visiting nurses, and those who help with baths, social workers who help you understand, medicine for pain and comfort control, beds, and almost all supplies. There are also Hospice Homes for those who do not want to be at home.

There is also a wonderful book EMBRACED BY THE LIGHT.

My prayers are with you as you go through this time.

Love

Vadis

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Vadis is right. Get hospice involved. Even if he doesn't need them a whole lot right now, as his condition declines, it will be good to have them familiar with him and already in the program. Hospice nurses are symptom management experts; they can help a lot. They also offer spiritual support, counseling, respite care, etc. If he wants to die at home vs. in a hospital, hospice is the way to go.

I'm sorry you are facing this. Remember - no one is better qualified to help your Dad through this difficult time than you, his family. It will be hard, but you will do well, because you love him. Best wishes to you, Teresa

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There isn't a way to be certain. My dad was given 4 months to live....he lived almost a whole year. And there were times when we just knew the end was near...and he bounced back! We had some VERY VERY good times thru it all as well.

Then at the very end...we had no clue at all...it hit all at once- he fell into a semi-coma and was gone 10 days later...just like that!....just two weeks before we had a grand aniversary party for him and my mom.

Point is, you just don't know when that time will be up. It's so hard, I know. There is still hope, and then that is tempered with hard realities.

It's a good idea to talk to your dad while he is still able to talk to you. Find out what he wants to do. How does he want to live the rest of his life, what does he want you guys to do? If you haven't already, talk to the doctors yourself. Line your ducks in a row and then hope for a miracle, while making the very best of whatever time you and your dad have together.

sending prayers and hope for that miracle. Keep us posted.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest cecilia

Dear Klooty,

It sounds like your dad is tired. All you can do is to be there and encourage him and love him. I agree, it is so terribly hard to watch your loved one suffer. I wish I could think of some words of wisdom to share with you, but all I can say is that I understand how you feel. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day and your dad will feel better. I'm sending you a hug and a prayer. Cecilia

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.