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Did he smoke?


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I wasn't sure if I should post this in the general forum or this one but finally decided that I felt more like a grieving daughter at the moment. This article just really hit me today but I felt it was well written and worth sharing. I don't have much else to say right now. Just taking one day at a time. One of these days I will post about my father's beautiful wake service and funeral. Just not ready yet.


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You know...my Mom has only barely just begun this journey, and already, I'm SICK of that question!!!

It's the first thing people say..."does she/did she smoke?"

Well ,yes, she did..and she still DOES. But does that make my Momma more deserving of death?? Does it lessen in ANY way, the incredible person she is, and always has been??

I hate that question...and am struggling with the whole smoking issue. I still smoke too...and am EXTREMELY angry at myself for that.

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I really loved the article but I couldn't relate to the author in terms of blaming her father for not being around. I never blamed my father or his smoking history for his cancer.

Perhaps because I have a grasp on the reality that never smokers get the same types of cancer too.

Perhaps because after he died, it was proven his cancer came from asbestos??? I don't know why, but I never judged him or blamed him.

I think I have a hard time placing blame on an addictive habit that is legal.

If he had OD'ed on heroin or illegal drugs, or driven drunk and died that way, then I think I would experience anger and would have placed blame.

Great article though and I can really relate to most of it.

Thanks for sharing.

I often looked at your dad's avatar pic and wondered- what was he like?


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