Patti B Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Was the darkest day of my life when I was told "its the worst it can possibly be". I cannot believe its been two years already - sometimes it seems like just yesterday and other times I feel like I have been on this rollercoaster ride forever. I do not know how to feel today. Part of me wants to celebrate my survival which is way past what I was told to expect and kinda say "in yo face" to the doctors that I have surpassed my so-called expiration date. But, on the other hand, when you have Stage IV LC, the farther out you get from diagnosis, there are certain realities that you have to face. I have been down in the dumps lately due to family issues and I still worry about whether or not the Tarceva is working since I never did get the side effects. I guess maybe that has something to do with why I can't just celebrate today. So tomorrow starts year three for me.............and I would like to say thanks to all of you who have held me up and made me giggle along the way. Hugs - Patti B. Quote
Kasey Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Well Miss Patti ~ YOU my not feel up to celebrating, so I will do it for you. I do SO understand the words you write AND your reluctance to really feel the power of being a 2 year survivor. I wish there were words to take away the uncertainly of it all ~ for ALL of us. But I have no idea just what they would be. All I know is that we must try to grab hold of every day we are given and live the crap of it before moving on to the next. Now for ME ~ I'm having a bit of a difficult time myself doing that lately . However, Patti, all that does not take away from the awesomeness of you being a 2 year survivor AND a 1 year memeber of this fabulous message board. Let's plan on taking things day by day until there have been another 365 of them tallied up and it's time to think about celebrating once again. I think I'm going to pick up a little something special (sweet) at the grocery in just a few minutes and savor the taste AND your survival. Kasey Quote
recce101 Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 I understand your mixed emotions, Patti, snce I have them too. But nothing diminishes the fact that we've both beaten the odds so far, you even more than me. "It's the worst it can possibly be" sounds more ominous than "it doesn't look very good," and both of those pronouncements are lying in the dust somewhere in the road behind us. I'm helping you celebrate! Aloha, Ned Quote
MsC1210 Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Patti my dear friend, CONGRATULATIONS ON 2 YEARS AND HERE'S TO MANY MORE!!! You are such an inspiration to so many people sweetie and we love you! You can be down for now but I am not gonna let that last too long!!!! Much love and many hugs Chris Quote
Muriel Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Congratulations, Patti. It's hard to be upbeat when you really don't know what's going to happen or when. Even if - and I do say if - the tarceva isn't working for you there are still other things to do. My suggestion is that, if you must, you sit down and cry for a while and then have a big bowl of chocolate ice cream. And do congratulate yourself for having made it this far. As for your family problems, do you want the keg bus? Muriel Quote
Connie B Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Happy Anniversary!!!!!!!!! YOU GO GIRLFRIEND!!! Yep, you NEED TO CELEBRATE! ((((((((((((((PATTI)))))))))))))))))))) Sending you POSITIVE HUGS And HAPPY HUGS to CELEBRATE! Quote
jaminkw Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Patti, I understand how difficult it is to stay "up" all the time. Even people like you lucky enough to be born with those optomist genes are allowed a little down time once in awhile. But I agree with Chris, we can't let you stay there for too long. Now, I'm celebrating for you too. Happy happy 2nd anniversary to a lovely funny warm and loving cancer survivor. Judy in Key West Quote
ill_rob Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Congratulations, Patti. Here's to year three and beyond! Take it one day at a time and try not get too down about the curveball life has thrown at you. Here's to many more anniversaries. -rob Quote
Larry's Wife Posted September 29, 2008 Posted September 29, 2008 Patti, I want to chime in with my congratulations on your 2-year anniversary. May we be celebrating your 20-year anniversary, too!! Love ya bunches, Lynn Quote
dscherer Posted September 30, 2008 Posted September 30, 2008 Patti, COngrats on 2 years! That is great! You are such an inspiration to many here on this site. Your love and laughter is contagious and I just know in my heart those wonderful traits will continue to see you thru many years to come. Don't make us start up the bus!!!!!! Continued Prayers, Dana Quote
Flyman35 Posted September 30, 2008 Posted September 30, 2008 I'm with Dana. Don't make us whip out the Keg Bus on you. Congrats on 2 years girlfriend!!! (((((Patti)))))) Denise Quote
SandraL Posted October 1, 2008 Posted October 1, 2008 Hi Patti and congratulations. I understand about the mixed feelings...go with the "in yo face". And just keep doing what you are doing because it is has worked so well. I am celebrating with you. Cheers your crazy cancer sister Sandra Quote
nonni Posted October 2, 2008 Posted October 2, 2008 Hi Patti Congrat's on 2 yrs and yes it is something to celebrate....and I think the part to 'in yo face' is the best for the doctor....Just love it Here's to many many more Pat....Doctors have been soooo wrong so many times...Just look at the board and see how many people are here for years and still going strong after 'oh yes...sorry ...3 months at the most"....BS!!!!! hugs...nonni Quote
Janet B Posted October 3, 2008 Posted October 3, 2008 Patti WOO HOO!!!!! Two years is awesome!!!! I understand exactly how you feel with the mixed emotions. I feel that way with each good scan - well, I think, that much closer to a bad one. (I always was a pessimist) But then I pick myself up and think that with each month I make it the researchers are one month closer to finding new drugs or - God please, a CURE! SO celebrate!! Janet Quote
Wendy Posted October 4, 2008 Posted October 4, 2008 Patti, And cheers to many more anniversaries ahead. AWESOME news!! Wendy Quote
shineladysue Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 (((Patti))), I"m a llittle late , but I'm here to celebrate your anniversary . Patti, you are such an inspiration to me and so many others. Try to stay positive, Patti. You have my prayers for upcoming scans ... Hugs, Sue Quote
alexan Posted October 8, 2008 Posted October 8, 2008 Patty congratulations!!!!!!! and for many many more. I woried like you I just have a little rash & some headache & thats it. We pray for tarceva to work hugs bucky Quote
carolhg Posted October 8, 2008 Posted October 8, 2008 Patti, Congratulations and know that I am wishing and praying for the very best for you and for all of us-the cure for this awful disease. Carol Quote
Barb73 Posted October 9, 2008 Posted October 9, 2008 Dear Patti, Please forgive the lateness of my congratulations to you on your two-years, Patti. It's a CELEBRATION, for sure. Let's celebrate. Just being here and being able to live all kinds of stuff - the good, the bad, and the worst. It's a mixed bag, for sure. There are those days when just trying to stay "up" is a struggle. Bill and I have "those" days. My prayers are for whatever it takes for all of us to keep on keeping on (a cure would be top of the list, dear Lord). In the meanwhile, the longer we live, the longer we live. Sending you a giant hug (((((Patti)))) You are an inspiration to me and to Bill, and to many, many others, and I thank you. Barbara Quote
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