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Holidays are hard


Bev'sSister

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Hi to all of you. It has been awhile since I have been on, but maybe some of you remember me. You were all such a tremendous help to me during my sisiter's illness.

I am in hopes of getting a little more support now. I don't mean to bring anyone down, but I am just curious to know if it is supposed to get HARDER with each holiday? This year seems to be harder for me than last year. I miss my sister so much right. I know it is partly due to the holidays, but why not this hard last year? It seems it would have gotten better this year.

Oh well, I did not come on here to be a gloomy gus. I have missed all of you too and have been lurking, just not posting.

BTW, has anyone heard from Carole Hammett.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Love to all,

Bobby

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Hi Bobby,

Of course I rememeber you...

Everyone is different, but my second thanksgiving was harder than the first, but my second Christmas however was easier. I know your loss was also in October...I think Novemebr hits, you are still in shock and can still summon "adrenaline" to get you through...And I think that is what I did the first thanksgiving...but by Christmas it has sunk in and I felt it very sharply. The second christmas there were tears, but not like the first where I had to leave folks downstairs and just go upstairs and break down.

Now that I am on my third set of holidays, I will share that Thanksgiving was hard, I had a few quiet tears...and a whole different view of the holiday. But I no longer "dread" what my emotions may be. I just know I will be sad and miss mom. It is now part of my "celebration" if you will. Your feelings won't change, but eventually, you'll get good at knowing what to do with them.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi Bobby-I haven't been on in a long time either. We just got back from

a 2 week vaca in Disney World and although it was the first vaca since my Mom was Dx it just wasn't like it used to be. Today I started getting my decorations out and it hit me so hard that my Mom is not going to be with us for the first time in my 40 years on this earth. I can't stop the tears today no matter how hard I try. I don't get on here anymore because to be honest my heart just can't take it. I feel I am re-living my Moms battle with every story that I read but then I also know everyone on here who has lost someone knows exactly the way I am feeling and when I have days like today it helps to know that you are not alone.

Anyhow to answer your question-this is only my first of everything in the past 6 months without my Mom but it hurts more than it did when she first passed.

I would do anything to talk to her again just one more time.

Take Care

Dar

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It's harder for you this year because you were still in the shock phase last year. That is how a grief counselor explained it to me. This year will be the the year you really feel the loss because you were still numb last year.

I know I am having a much worse time then I did last year. Everything seems to be hard and just overwhelming.

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I am on year three here with out deb HArd to believe Huh!?!? :shock: this yer has not been so bad for me but I have surrounded myself with a few new friends nad things are going on for me personally which is good! I have not had a breakdown in quite some time! I do miss deb but I know that I have to go on with MY life also! I have taken her xmas wresth to her site for Her nad Daisy also. daisy was cremated and spread over our plots !!Mine is next to Debs!!

year three has been kinder and gentler than 1 and 2 were. Life is good today!!!!

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Hi Bobby. So good to hear from you again. After 6 years, I have to agree that each passing holiday seems to be harder for me. My life is full and one would think that time would have put some distance between the pain I felt 6 years ago. But....for some strange reason, the pain feels worse. I think each passing year puts more time between my memories of him and just makes me feel further away. Please keep in touch with us.

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