Not again.

[magchap]

It has been nearly 6 years since I found myself researching lung cancer and I sure wish I would have found something like lungevity back then.

I lost my mom (61 years young) on Jan. 3, 2003 to NSCLC, IV (mets to the brain) after her corageous five month battle with the beast. Since that time, the holidays have been rotten and all I really want to do is fast-forward until January.

I just learned that my mother's only living brother (my uncle) -- also in his early 60's, has also been diagnosed with lung cancer, mets to the bone. I absolutely cannot believe that we are now facing the same heartache all over again and that someone that I love will be suffering very much the way my mom did, very much around the same time period.

Once again, I'm not sleeping, I'm stressed, and sad -- realizing all along that it isn't about "me" -- but it's about them. We are all very close and very involved in each other's lives. I dont even know how to begin to muster up the strength to get through this one.

Has anyone else found themselves laying awake at night and asking, "hey God ... where are you?"

[SandraL]

Hi there and I am so sorry about both your mom and your uncle. There are others here who have had more than one family member affected. Makes what already was a nightmare even worse. I am sure many of us, myself included, lay awake at night and wonder about many many things. But with our support at home and here, we greet the day with a smile and find the strength and hope to keep on fighting. I wish you strength during this even more difficult time. I hope you stay here and keep us posted on how you, your family and your uncle are doing. This is a group of people who really do get it and who care.

Sandra

[MsC1210]

Magchap

Hello and welcome to the family. I am so very sorry you have reason, again to be finding a site like this but I am so glad you have joined us.

As hard as this is, please try and keep hope alive. Treatments and medications have come a VERY LONG WAY since your Mom was sick and there are many more and better options out there now. I know how difficult this early part is for everyone, we all know, but it will be easier to deal with and cope with once your uncle has a treatment plan in place.

In the meantime, please know that there are a lot of wonderful and caring people on this site and we will do all that we can to help you through this rough time.

Many thoughts, prayers and hugs for you

Christine

[Donna G]

Welcome, I am glad you found us.

We have members here that have had multiple family members with this diagnosis. Connie B is a friend of mine and she lost her mother , father and sister to lung cancer then she was diagnosed at 43. Since then others like aunt etc have also been told that they have lung cancer. In some families it seems to hit hard.

Please let us know how he is doing. Remember some of us do survive. I am cancer free, and a 11 year survivor.

Donna G

[Connie B]

Welcome and so sorry to hear you lost your mom and now facing yet another dx.s with your Uncle.

I'm the Connie B that Donna was talking about. I honestly know of many families that have been hit hard and heavy with lung cancer. It honestly sucks no matter what kind of cancer it is, but everyone here sure hates lung cancer.

My mom and sister were dx.d 3 months apart from one another, It hit my family very hard. They died 8 months apart from one another. I am now dealing with my mom's sister (74) my aunt who is going to be having surgery this Monday. And yes, it's lung cancer. I know what you mean when you say, GOD are you out there? Yep, been there, done that!

Please know we all understand and if you need an ear, we're all here for you, and so am I. I have friends that had/have bone mets and they are still here 3+ years later. One of them is on this board. (Wendy). So, don't give up hope. It's not over till that fat lady sings, don't forget!

[KatieB]

We get it. I've lost a lot of family members and there are a lot of times I wonder where God is in any of this just like you.

And I don't have an easy answer for you. I don't think there is one. I just take it in a little at a time and try to focus on the things in my life that are in my control and on the positive things. That's all we can do really.

We are here for you. I'm sorry for your loss.

[magchap]

Thanks for the warm welcome everyone! Now that I have had a chance to look through all the topics and read all of the stories, wow, I am most touched by all of the very caring people - not to mention the stories. I know I am not alone and have read many, countless stories of people losing those near and dear (in some case one right after another). In the midst of this strife, it is easy to question God's whereabouts, but I know too that He is here ... orchestrating the life according to HIS plan. Sometimes I just wish I had a sneak peak at the outline, though, you know?

Anyway, we have the pathology results and my uncle has SCLC, extensive stage. He was given two options: Hospice or Chemo (with combo regime of carbplatin and estoposide). The approach is going to be 3 days a week, every 3 weeks, and then a week off. Does that mean if he begins on Monday (12/15) for three days, he will be off of chemo until the beginning of January? With my mom, well, she wasn't a candidate for chemo so this is all very new to me.

What is truly horrible is that I am getting the impression that his Oncologist hasn't been very clear to him about the prognosis. I have read lots of survival, terrific stories on this board and, while encouraging, he has a host of other serious health issues that might make him less likely to be among those that beat the odds (although I pray). Also, he is without insurance. They are going to take their last life savings for chemo treatment, leaving them nothing for end-of-life decisions (like the comforts of hospice). It's so horrible. I'm glad I found you - but so sad that I had to look for you.

Tracy

Mom diagnosed with NSCLC IV with mets to Brian 8/3/2002

Gamma Knife 8/2002

Conventional Brain Surgery 9/2002

Participated in Iressa Study 11/15/2002-12/1/2002)

Entered Hospice 12/7/2002

Went home 1/3/2003

Uncle diagnoed with SCLC ES with mets to spin/bone/lymph nodes

To begin Chemo 12/15 (Carboplatin and Estposide)

[SandraL]

Oh Tracy. I am so glad you found us as well. I am sending lots of positive thoughts and prayers that the chemo does his job despite the other health issues. Every case is unique. It is so sad to read that life savings are involved. Total crap to have to deal with that on top of fighting this darn disease. My heart goes out to you. Just keep on thinking positive and hoping. As you know, the rest is up to someone else. Take good care

Sandra

[Connie B]

Hi Tracy,

Oh Tracy you and your uncle need to know that chemo responds very well to small cell lung cancer. I'm sorry his Onc Doc isn't offering much hope. Shame on the Onc Doc. I know many even on this board that are Small Cell Extensive Survivors and are doing very well after there chemo. One of my friends is soon to be a 9 year EX-SCLC survivor and is STILL cancer free. The first doctor (Onc Doc) she had gave her 6 months and she didn't like what he said and how he treated her so she fired his *ss. (quote). She got a doctor that was willing to fight the fight and well, the rest is history. She's over 70 now.

Tell your Uncle to go for it and let him know I am cheering him on.

[KatieB]

1) there IS hope

2) I would suggest to them to seek out the hospital social worker to see if there are some programs that would help with the cost of treatment. There are also pharmacutical companies that have programs that help patients have lower or free access to their medications as well.

3) There are state hospice programs for those who can't afford it as well.

I'd check into all the programs available before draining a life savings.

I'm hoping for the very best. Please keep us posted.

[Flyman35]

Welcome magchap. I'm sorry about your mom and uncle. Tom and I have also lost several family members to canceras well. It's so not fair.

You and your uncle will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Denise

[Andrea]

I am so sorry you had to find us. Too many of us get it. Don't give up hope or listen to stats. There is proof here that stats don't always mean anything!

Keep us updated.

[Barb73]

Magchap,

I am sorry to learn of your uncle's diagnosis. There isn't a person here at this wonderful, caring site, I'll bet, who thinks lung cancer is easy. The diagnosis can leave a bad taste. I remember that day very well.

BUT, as has been said already, don't listen to or read Stats. Most of them are not taking into account variables that change the equation. Most are not up-to-date either.

As for the chemo therapies of today, there are more than there were, and I know of cases of small cell lung cancer which responded very well to chemo.

The owner of our favorite restaurant, age 46, is undergoing chemotherapy (already has had PCI) for SCLC, and is doing well.

Our daughter-in-law lost her father 9 years ago to SCLC (age 58). The protocols that he received have changed.

Today, there is more hope and there are better treatments. Keep hope.

Wishing all the best for you and your family. Please visit and let us know how your uncle is doing.

Barbara

[jaminkw]

madchap, I just want to emphasize what others have said THERE IS HOPE. Treatments have come a long way in six years.

Also, find that social worker or maybe it's called a "self pay representative" at your uncle's hospital or cancer facility. There may be help so the family does not deplete life savings. It's been said that sometime they don't just offer help to older people because they are proud and don't want to be seen as a charity case. Cancer treatment expenses are huge and help can be proportionate to you income based on tax returns, not an all or nothing thing like government assistance where you qualify or not. And it's true what Katie says, your oncologist can recommend your uncle for pharmaceutical company drug replacement. Please, tell someone in the family to check it out.

Judy in Key West