Teardrop Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Dear Members, My sister is terminal and I really could use your support at this time. I read about Hospice, and the process , I just want you to know they are controlling the PAIN as much as possible.without Hospice right now. My sister was so well yesterday, then was in severe pain, that they had to increase her morphine. She was up all night, finally is sleeping now. She is due for Radiation , they are trying to fit her in. I don't know if I belong here at this point. But I really need some friends right now. I need to know if she will come out of this yet,I am so lost right now. I try to read up on this with the internet, some things are hard for me to understand I try though. Hospice isn't there yet, she just has severe pain and the BEAST is letting her know he's there. Will she be able to communicate with us still. Please help me to understand more, can they relieve her pain and will she come back and be as normal as she can be. Love Teardrop PS Can I come here if I need you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ts Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 oh sweetie, that's what we are here for. I can't answer your questions, but some of the caregivers will drop by soon with great information and lots of hugs. Take care of yourself, as well as your sister. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ginnyde Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Dear Teardrop, The role of hospice is to control pain and make the patient as comfortable as possible. Nobody can tell you if your sister will be 'as normal' as possible but for sure she should have her pain controlled. It is very difficult for you to see your beloved sister like this. Come here for support whenever you need it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 We are always here for anything you need. Pain management is PRIORITY ONE for hospice that is their KEY Job. THey can also help you understand what exactly is going on and the whole process of what is happening. I never had any Hospice issues because we never had the chance to use them but Our local hospice is wonderful people. You can be here every waking moment if you need or want to. Even if we cant get an answer we can always offer and ear to listen with and a shoulder to Lean on whenever Ya need it!!! Hugs and Prayers for Comfort and Peace and strength right now........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MsC1210 Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 ((((Teardrop)))) Of course you can and SHOULD come here whenever you need to. We are here for you and we will continue to be here! I am so sorry that your sister is having so much pain. I wish we could take that away for you both. Please keep posting and let us know how you are and how your dear sister is. Much love and many hugs and prayers Christine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linda74 Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 My husband's pain became very acute and they had pain management people increase his fentanyl patch and give him dilaudid and later morphine. Xanax also helped as he became very anxious. Hospice was wonderful at helping us with the whole process and even now that he is gone offering grief support. She should not be in pain....and despite enough pain medicine to keep an elephant down, my husband was coherent right up until he was actively dying. God Bless You and come here often....you will be taken care of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillise Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Teardrop--you come here anytime you need to. That's what we are here for. I'm so sorry you are having to face your worst fears now. I will keep you and your sister in my prayers. You are not alone. Susan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiny Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 This is a tough road to travel, but you can have support on the way by visiting here. We used Hospice for both my parents at the end, and they are WONDERFUL. Get them on board ASAP and be honest about needs, concerns, pain, etc. No question is too insignificant. They need you to communicate with them so that they can do their best job and help the family too. So sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 10, 2009 Author Share Posted February 10, 2009 Dear Members, My heart is open to you caring and prayers for me and my sister. I would like to repeat from previously messages that I told you I live far away. But I plan on seeing her this weekend. Since she is terminal, and doesn't want a second option, I find it hard not to feel differently. Me and my youngest sister found Cancer Center.com, where they take advanced lung cancer, and to call a 1-800 # for her area, I know my sister doesn't want to travel or change her doctor, She told me this is her wishes, how do I reach her , should I ask her again, she was firm about it though. OR do you think my HOPE should not be so high, as the cancer is spreading Primary Lung cancer, and secondary Bone, radiation on knee bone, has in spine, and last night pain in breast. The doctor is giving her radiation one more time, and then he's going to try a different Chemo. Do you think this is Tarceva, a chance for hope? Or do they give this to you sooner. And the Chemo is just for pain. God Bless All and my prayers are for you too. Teardrop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linda74 Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 My husband's cancer spread so fast and he had so many complications that he only got 4 rounds of Alimta/carbo. In the hospital, when the cancer was advancing rapidly, they began Tarceva, but he only had it for 6 days until I took him off of it because he had such shortness of breath and had deteriorated so fast, that I felt if Tarceva was a drug to stabilize him, he was no longer at a point where being stabile would mean quality of life. Teardrop, it is a difficult question. I think when you see your sister, you will better be able to judge what is right. In the end, it is her decision but perhaps having people there who love her will bring out the "fight" in her. I know that is what urged my husband to fight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandraL Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Oh teardrop. You can come here anytime and as often as you need to for however long you need to. That is exactly what this site is for. Prayers that your sister gets more comfortable and that many more positive memories can be made. Sandra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellen in PA Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Hi Teardrop. I'm so sorry for what you and your sister are going through. But I must point out that you should be very cautious about persuading your sister to go to cancercenter.com, also known as 'Cancer Treatment Centers of America'. First, the '.com' in their URL tells you it is a FOR-PROFIT organization. Second, if you do a search of them on google, you'll see that they've been successfully prosecuted for false advertising. While they probably do as well as any other cancer center with treatable conditions, they seem to prey on very serious conditions that other (NON-profit) cancer centers recommend hospice for. If you want your sister's pain management to be the best, which you clearly do, then I'd suggest you follow the advice of others here who've been down that road and have hospice called in. And hang in there and good luck. Ellen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 14, 2009 Author Share Posted February 14, 2009 Dear Members, I appreicate all the replies and love. I will tell you what is going on with my sister. She was throwning up, and she wanted to go into the hospital. She could not keep the food down, which is little what she eats,and she drank very little. Hospice care is short handed and would be able to come one day to check on her where she lives, she has a devoted husband who's taking care of her. My sister is getting a nurse through the county for the aged that will come 4 days though. The doctor put her back into the hospital friday 2/13 morning, he's giving her steriods, to build her up . I found out also that she has 6months to 1 year. I know from this site don't believe the amount of time left. She is a fighter, the pain is what getting her. I will be going up, and staying overnight in the hospital to be with her. I also plan on going up, and staying longer than 2 days, next time. What are the steriods for, doctor said he's trying to reverse the cancer. He was going to make his own mixture of chemo to give her, but right now he decided to give her steriods does this also reverse the cancer or boost the body ? It's so hard for me to understand things, could you be kind to explain. Sincerely Teardrops Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted February 14, 2009 Share Posted February 14, 2009 See if you can find out what his own chemo is for one thing that scares me. now for steroids, They are considered an anti inflammatory drug and relieve swelling and decrease muscle mass. This is where his theory of steroids as a cancer reversal come into play. They dont really stop or cure or treat the cancer but they do help relieve growth of tumors and this is what he is telling you. Be aware that there are side effects though. Especially pshycological effects and mental effects This can be bad if not monitored closely so be careful. Wish I had more but this is best I can do right now. Hugs and Prayers Randy in NC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patti B Posted February 14, 2009 Share Posted February 14, 2009 ((((Teardrop)))) I am so sorry that you and your sister are going through this. I do agree, however, with Randy. What does the doctor mean by mixing up his own chemo??? Please try to find out what that is. Hoping that things begin to go better for your sister. Hugs - Patti B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 18, 2009 Author Share Posted February 18, 2009 Dear Members, I went on the weekend to see my sister, stayed in hospital with her. She was in pain so they gave her pain meds. IV feeding, as she doesn't eat to much,steriods. I really can see now what the BEAST does to someone. She had pains in lower back, gave meds we went to sleep for 1-1/2 hrs she woke up in pain in leg so gave pain meds again.Had eyes closed during the day, heard everything family was saying,not sleeping. Found out Monday will gave her for 15 days radiation, no chemo now. Saids she wants to die,because of the pain. She was giving away her possessions , while I was there. This evening won't take pills, still in hospital, say they are trying to kill her. I'm so glad she's in the hospital , as everyone is asking her to take the pills and she won't listen. My heart hurts, on what she is going through. Sincerely Teardrop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 Are they administering Morphine injections? PAin control is the Number one thing at any time. I wish i had more but just thoughts and prayers right now for everyone there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 18, 2009 Author Share Posted February 18, 2009 Dear Randy, They are administering Morphine. She had radiation today on the brain. Sincerely Teardrop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 Hugs and Prayers For everyone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shineladysue Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 (((Teardrop))), I am so very sorry your sister is going through so much right now. My heart goes out to you and your family. Wish I could answer questions, but I don't have answers. Just know that my thoughts and prayers are with your sister, you and your family. Hugs, Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patti B Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 Teardrop- Know that you and your sister are in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry that you are going through this. Hugs - Patti B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 23, 2009 Author Share Posted February 23, 2009 Dear Members, My sister is not eating do to fear of throwing up, is there anything that can be given her or said to her? Is it wrong for me to hang onto a miracle with radiation still given, will this kill the cancer cells ALL over her body or just in her brain OR control pain? Is there a easy way of giving her the pills to take ,can crushing them be ok, and put in teaspoons of tea. All I have is HOPE, and God only knows. Sincerely, Teardrop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 23, 2009 Author Share Posted February 23, 2009 Dear Members, To tell you what the doctor said, IT"S premature to plan for a resting place yet. As my sister husband is confused, as he has given her weeks, and 14 more radiations. Sincerely Teardrop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
recce101 Posted February 23, 2009 Share Posted February 23, 2009 Teardrop: If your sister is not eating because she's feeling nauseated, there are good anti-nausea medications she can be given. If it's mainly a FEAR of becoming nauseated, that may be more of an anxiety issue, and there are other medications for that. In either case, neither of you should be worried about her becoming dependent on drugs or addicted — they are intended for times like this. About crushing the pills, check with the nurses. Some are okay to crush, but some are not. Radiation is intended to kill the cancer cells or control pain in the specific area where it's directed. With Aloha, Ned Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teardrop Posted February 23, 2009 Author Share Posted February 23, 2009 Dear Members, My sister is taking alot of medication. My question is she is terminal ,do you have the names of medication to fight the cancer cell in pill form besides Tarceva, that kill the cancer cells, as she has a list at home my sister can check to see if they are on it. She is doing well today, except eating not enough, do they have a medication to help her with this (like feeding tube subtitute in pill form) and what is the name? And doesn't a attitude of being positive around her, might bring her back, from being hopeless. As some of her children aren't around for her even though they live close. I hope she doesn't feel depress over that. I feel that could make her to give up to, as they see the material things, as they are poor, and don't show any affection toward her. Sincerely Teardrop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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