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Getting to Know You - Monday, November 2


Ann

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[/b]When you first found out that your loved one had been diagnosed with lung cancer, who was the person you first shared the news with? How long did it take for you to realize accept that the diagnosis was real?

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This is harder than it sounds. Because of the lack of a lot of testing there was never a time that we were really told. His initial diagnoses was more of an assumption for a long time.

When he did hava a CAT he got the results while I was on the train stuck in San Antoino for two days. The scan still didn't come to a conclusion. Instead it said that there were numerous nodules that could possibly be lung cancer. Once I was there we went to the doctor(again I use that word lightly) who had ordered the test. He said it looked like he had cancer in his lung that had matastisized from his prostrate. Later that was proven wrong.

His final diagnosis came in the hopital early the next Monday morning after I got to him. The surgeon who had removed the lymph node from his neck came and told us that he had stage 4 NSCLC. Johnny's daughter in law was with me at the time, Johnny was still in recovery.

So many things later as well as early one still leave me with questions about him having cancer, at least as advanced as they said. Still when the oncologist came to his room that day is when I finally started to believe. Because I had lost my mom to lung cancer I think somewhere deep inside of me I suspected right from the time we found each other again.

As for accepting, sometimes I still find that hard. After 7 years I feel he should just walk in the door and tell me it was all a big mistake.

God how I hate it and what it has done to all of us.

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I got the news of my husbands cancer over the telephone from the attending physician at the hospital where he had recently been discharged for pneumonia. The first person I told was my son and then I called our PCP and headed over to his office. I didn't want to believe the hospital physician knew what he was talking about. I still didn't even tell my husband for a few days. And as far as accepting his diagnosis...I never really did completely up until the last couple of days. I always told myself that there "had to have been a mistake". I firmly believed and was in denial thinking the 6 hospital admits for pneumonia is what took him away from me.

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we found out after the needle biopsy but were pretty sure before hand!! My Former PCP told us his suspicions and said he was pretty sure based on what he had seen in X rays and cat scans!! He was awesome and I do miss him since he retired. He was also my therapist after Deb died!!!

First family member was my mom who took us to the Surgeons office and kept us company for moral support! Love that Woman to death Thanks Mom!!! :wink: (((Mom)))))

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I called my friend, Sue and told her right after the doctor told us. It was easy for me to tell her but telling our boys and Dennis' mom and dad were so very hard. Sue has always been my rock and before this, she always seemed to know just what to do or say to make things better...or at least seem better. When she heard this news, she was speechless and it was the first time I remember her being speechless.

I was in denial until the first chemo treatment and that made the word cancer very real for me. At first, Dennis and I didn't talk about it a lot with each other. It was almost as if we didn't say the "C" word, it wouldn't be real. After the diagnosis, things started happening so fast that it was hard to find the time to just let it all soak in. There were so many arrangements to make....appointments to schedule, ports, blood work and about a million new terms and words to figure out.

Oh....how I wish this wasn't a question that any of us had to answer!!!

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My husband was in the room when I received the diagnosis over the phone. The first person I shared the diagnosis with was my mother - my son was with my parents while I went in for the biopsy, just in case I ended up admitted with a collapsed lung.

When did it really sink in? Two days later when I had a bit of a breakdown at work...I had to tell too many people about what was going on and with each telling of the story, the reality sank in deeper and deeper...

Scary times, they were.

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I was alone in the emergency room - they made my husband wait in the waiting room - so as soon as they told me i asked for him and I just blurted it out at him as soon as he walked in - poor guy. Then on the way home I called my best friend of 40 years. For me it sank in immediately. It was such a horrible way to find out (as if there was a good way)- and it was a cold, dark ,rainy night - and I had been in pain for so long wondering in the back of my mind if that was what it was - that when they told me, that was it, I knew.

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