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jealous and anger


shirleyb

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I figured something out today. I found out I am jealous!!! I am mainly jealous of couples.

I also found out I get angry with couples who are fighting over stuf that come a week from now won't mean a thing. Especially the ones who fight and don't have a clue what it is like to lose someone they love. I have seen couples arguing over the stupidest of things, and I get jealous and angry. I want to just smack them between the eyes and say wake up!!! Don't you realize what you are doing. I would give anything to be in your shoes. To have my husband back, bad habits and all. I want to yell at them, don't you get it???? Don't you understand that time is so precious and you are wasting it????

I just got back from having a wonderful afternoon with my brother and sister in law. It was her family's Christmas gathering. It was so nice to see them all but at the same time I was jealous of the "couples". It is hard to see them together. I reminds me that Randy is gone and it hurts.

Thanks for listening.

May we all find some peace this holiday season and every other day we have.

Much love,

Shirley

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Oh Shirley,

I see that my mom is jelous too. It's hard not to be. I hate hearing "daddy" from a girl to her father- even on TV- because I will never call anyone that again. My mom avoids seeing her friends who are married, and when she does, she looks so very sad...it's obvious then how much she misses being a part of a couple, but most of all how very much she misses my dad.

I get how you're feeling. It's normal- and it hurts. There will be others on here (spouses) who will understand what you are feeling much more than me, I just wanted to post and send you a ((HUG))

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Shirley,

I know how you feel, I am going through it myself, near where I live

there are a lot of places for old people (I'm nearly there, but not yet)

and the shopping mall is where you see them, very often, one is in a wheelchair and the spouse is right there, and I always ask, why not me,

at the end Mike was in a wheelchair, that I proudly pushed everywhere,now he is gone and I am jaleous of everybody that is older than my husband and still alive even if they can't walk or talk.

I don't fight it, it may go away or stay but it is there.

Hope for us that we get adjusted to be one instead of a couple.

J.C.

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Oh, man, Shirley! Do I know what you mean! In the early stages of my grief (as you are in yours) I positively felt hatred for elderly couples in particular. Every time I would see them, I would be screaming inside "It's not fair!! Why do THEY get 50 years, and we only got 17??"

Going out on Saturday nights was impossible. That is "couples" night, and seeing them in restaurants having intimate dinners was way too painful a reminder of what I had and lost.

Anger is a stage of grief, and a normal part of it. Don't deny your feelings - this too will pass, I promise.

You are NOT alone in what you feel.

Hugs to you.

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Shirley, we have discussed this before but I am so glad for this post! I went to a Christmas party last night at a dear friends house. This is an annual party for her....been going for years! Well, most of the couples were friends of mine and Dennis. We all knew the same funny stories about each others experiences and were very happy spending the evening together! Last night, I felt more alone than I have in a while! I was sitting next to an end table that had the little chimes sitting there! Everytime the chimes would make their noise, I looked and thought of Dennis...hoping he was there with us in spirit!!! This is a terrible time of the year to deal with this!!!!

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