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Bill Will Be Coming Home


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Hi Everyone,

Just a line to say that yesterday I received a very lovely birthday present. Bill will be coming home from the facility.

They had thought that two more weeks might be the target date, but after I thought about that, I urged an earlier date. Next Tuesday, he will be, hopefully, back home.

He will be on the main floor. We have set up everything in the dining room, where he can be near to "what is going on."

He is very tired. It's been a long ride, with and without bumps. But, in the main, we cannot say that it hasn't been worth it all. We know that it has definitely been worth it.

One of the reasons that it has been crucial to stay at the facility has been to make sure Bill eats the meals. his appetite is good once again, and without the right arm to use, the left makes it difficult with certain foods. Plus, they don't always remember to cut the food into human bites.

Yesterday, a very kind nurse's aid helped him eat when I was late getting there for breakfast. There have been times, though, when the food was left at the end of the bed, and ice cold. So, I found out where the microwave was located resulting in less concern.

After awhile, you find yourself camping out at the place and doing the jobs the aids do. In a sense, it is good training for when we have him home.

I have watched their techniques, and have seen how to do things with less effort. For instance, Bill has developed sores on his heels (pressure wounds) and they will continue to need attention. All-in-all, it will be OK, with the help of God.

Sorry to be so lengthy here. Just wanted you to know that no one should ever be without someone to "be there" when they enter a hospital, a rehab facility, or a nursing home. It's an imperative.

BTW, thank you for the concern. I know without your prayers and good thoughts, this would have been a much tougher time in our lives.


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Barb, I am so happy for you that Bill is coming home. I remember when they told Earl it was time for hospice his dr. recommended a hospice facility saying "It is like a country club".

No way. He was coming home. Earl loved our home and I loved being with him every minute. Like you, I set up everything in our family room so he was not exiled or isolated.

I hope you have some help. You need to take care of yourself so you can take care of your sweetheart.

Your posts have been missed, welcome home.

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Barb, this is the first post I saw when I came on site so I'm delaying the Air to tell you how happy I am for you and Bill that he's coming home soon. Seeing to his needs is one thing, but that running back and forth to the facility is energy draining. I know being away from home all day without an opportunity to stretch out for a little is tough for me.

Hope you can find that fine line between taking care of Bill and taking care of yourself. I know you are a dedicated caretaker but it all hinges on you being well.

Thank you for the kind and always eloquent words on my recent "funk" thread. We do miss that here when you need to be away from us.

Judy in Key West

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What wonderful, wonderful news this morning, Barbara. Just knew you and Bill would pulll this off. And what a relief for you to not have that running back and forth in cold and rain and snow and ice. You are the BEST to have in one's corner. No grass grows under YOUR feet and you are sharp too ~ keep everything running just the way it ought.

I'll be checking in on you and we can chat. In the meantime, make sure you get rested up and help lined up. This is a huge undertaking. I know you already know it. Just want to be sure you don't attempt heroic measures all on your own. 2 hours and 51 minutes!!!!!



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It's just like the old saying "There's no place like home". I'm sure you'll both be relieved when he finally gets there. I too was so happy when I was able to bring my husband home so that I knew he was going to get the best care possible and he would feel so much better being surrounded by his own things.

This is going to get a tough job now, but then, I'm sure you know that already. My thoughts and prayers are with you both.

Post when you can dear one

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Just wanted you to know that no one should ever be without someone to "be there" when they enter a hospital, a rehab facility, or a nursing home. It's an imperative.

That's so true! Even in the best facility, with a competent and caring nursing staff, things can be missed. And even a "small" thing can mushroom into a big problem when the patient has limited reserves to fall back on. Happy Bill is coming home, and yes, check into what home services are available. Take care of yourself, Barbara (easy for us to say, I know). Much Aloha,


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I'm glad to hear that the plan is for Bill to return home soon. I fully understand what you are saying about being there with your loved one when they are hospitalized or in a facility. I've always been there for my loved ones and felt sorry for patients who seemed to have no one. But, Barb , please look out for yourself, when you can, also. I know how hard that can be. Be glad for both of you when you are in your own home. Lots of prayers continue to come your way.



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Another post I missed - where is my brain lately???

SOOOOO glad that Bill will be home with you. I KNOW noone else can take care of him the way you will!!!

Keep us posted please.

Oh - and belated happy birthday - my dads would have been yesterday, too!!!!

Hugs - Patti B.

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You people are the best. Just reading your responses has given me a boost, and a caution. My sense is that this could turn into a hefty job, and help will be important.

(I read every single one of your replies, but will address all in this post.)

Today, I signed (for Medicare) that Bill was not being forced out of the facility, but that it was a normal release. :roll:

Probably, they are concerned that someone might have their time shortened against their will. I told the representative that we wanted to go earlier on our own volition.

The bed request, they informed me, depends on whether or not Bill qualifies for it. If not, then we will rent one, I suppose.

I don't want hospice right now. We just weren't ready for that scenario when we were approached by them in October.

Actually they entered by way of the oncologist. My feeling was that he didn't know what else to suggest. He meant well. He is a caring person.

They said that we could have nursing help through Medicare for about a month, or so. I have watched the aid wash and dress Bill, and know the routine.

If I get in trouble with the care I'll call in hospice. That is always an option, or that was what we were told when we left them. Hopefully, that is the case.

Taking care of myself is a priority only because if I don't Bill will be in dire circumstances. There isn't anyone able to take care of him, though they may wish they were free to do so.

The thought of him in a nursing home sends chills up my spine. Home on one level, with familiar things around him, lots of gentle stimuli in the environment, and a lap cat who misses him a lot are what I would want for myself.

I will keep updating on what is happening as we go along. It won't be morbid. My view is that we do the best we can with what we have, and leave the big stuff up to God.

Thanks for all the caring. It matters to have you to share this.


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Bless both of you! You will be in my thoughts and prayers. As far as hospice, they were a blessing for me when my husband came home from his final visit to the hospital. I was able to sleep in the next room but still keep the baby monitor just in case. They took excellent care of my husband PLUS they took care of me as well.

I think the only mistake I made was waiting TOO LONG before calling hospice into the home. I should have done it sooner I believe now that I know what excellent care they gave us.

God Bless you both!

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Oh dear Barbara - I almost missed this. I am so happy that Bill is back at home now under your loving and watchful care. I, too, would wish to be at home where things are familiar - we all know how that word "home" invokes such a peaceful feeling. I hope that things are going smoothly and that you are managing to take those moments to regenerate yourself. I will be keeping you and Bill in my prayers.



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