brokenarrow Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 Hello My Friends! Sorry I haven't been around. Not for a lack of love, but have had some trouble addressing the psychological ramifications of focusing on cancer. Right or wrong, that included websites and support groups that are focused around cancer. I'm a little better about it right now, today, which is a little strange because my SIL's husband wasn't expected to make through the night. I think his started out as bladder cancer. Anyway, I've been avoiding focusing on cancer so I haven't been around. Sure I get my check-ups and take my medicine. Just been focusing on life and living, being passionate about politics and family and stuff. As far as my health, I'm doing great. I'm working again. Been in the gulf for five weeks and supposed to go home today. I always seem to have some kind of drama going on. I need to go check on my mom, my stepdaughter needs my hugs, well, there's a bunch that need my hugs but she does a little worse. Today, my relief has a flat tire and will be late. That's a pretty big deal when you're in the gulf of Mexico. But that's where my focus is, (life's drama) and I'm doing well. I have a little different mindset about my cancer since my last episode. I had let myself believe that I might be cured until October and when that PET showed hot it was emotionally horrible. I won't allow myself into that trap again. My new mindset is that in all likelihood I will have another and another and another battle with this crap, but while I can I'm not living cripple because of it. I'll get my checks and take my medicine but I don't spend much time researching new treatments or otherwise really focusing on cancer. No way I can defend any argument that says I should do differently but that's where I've found some comfort and enjoyment lately. I do worry about y'all and other friends, each battling your own monsters. I pray for you, but I've run out of consoling words as I've come to realize they don't truly console much. Maybe this is all just a phase. I don't know. I love you all and I hope that each of you find peace in your own lives and comfort in your way of dealing with your drama. God bless you! Will Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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