Hello, my name is Felicia

[flbailey]

Hello, my name is Felicia and I just lost my Mom to lung cancer on January 27, 2011. She was diagnosed in Jan of 2008 and eventually had mets to various organs starting with the brain. It has been a long road and although I am so very sad I am grateful that my Mom is no longer in pain. I am having alot of trouble dealing with her being gone and was hoping to find some support here. Any response would be greatly appreciated. My Mom's name was JoAnn and she was a remarkable woman and will continue to inspire me every day.

Thank you

Felicia B

[Annette]

Felicia,

Even without knowing the whole story - three years with mets everywhere makes it sound like your mom fought a brave battle. There are many people on this forum in your situation - and I'm sure someone who can understand what you are going thru will be here soon to give you the proper words. All I can say is, you have come to a place that will provide you a huge virtual shoulder and a hug and/or tissue as you need. Telling your story and letting others hear about you and your brave mother I hope will bring you some tender feelings.

Prayers and hugs,

annette

[ts]

Hi Felicia,

I lost my Mom to lung cancer in 1983 - two months after she was diagnosed. The best thing that happened for me was a family reunion that had been planned a year prior - and took place a month after her death. I met all these people who knew her as a girl and was warmly welcomed by their stories and unconditional love. It helped me get through that very dark time. It took at least a year before I felt like I could move on. So time, story telling, talking to her about what's gong on (in the car, under the stars, in the shower) can help. There are also survivors groups if you feel like talking to others. And we are here.

A friend is working on a prayer for those who are bedside of a loved one who is dying - the last piece of it may be of some comfort for you and others experiencing this recent loss. I share this with her approval:

"Grant us strength and courage to face the finality of ____________’s death and to recognize that everything in life is always changing, moving onward to something else. After mourning, heal and transform our loss, grief and sorrow so that we may  live our lives fully with enthusiasm, love and faith as we transition and grow, not knowing what the next moment may bring."

Sounds like JoAnn was lucky to have a kind and thoughtful daughter. Be kind to yourself.

[Bud Baker]

Welcome, Felicia. Condolences on the loss of your mother. I'm a survivor and haven't faced what you are right now, but there are lots of people here who have and can help.

[Joppette]

Hi Felicia, welcome here.

My Mom got breast cancer in 1989, and fought that, then was diagnosed with primary lung cancer in 1996. She lived about 10 months after that diagnosis. She was sick the 7 years. Like you, I struggled huge when she died. While I didn't want her to suffer anymore, I also didn't want to lose my Mom. I was about 40 when she died. She was my best friend.

I think this place is an awesome on line support community. I wish I had discovered it when I got cancer, and certainly would have appreciated it back in the 90's. I think it's good to come and post your feelings, and get support, and eventually you'll be giving support because you can.

One day at a time. That's all I can advise. My condolences on this too. (((HUG)))

Judy in MI