phranc2002 Posted March 12, 2011 Share Posted March 12, 2011 I joined this site back in 2007 when a PET scan which came about from a cancerous lump removed from lip revealed the following: Thorax: No evidence of abnormal hypermetabolic activity or suspicious nodule. There is a 2.9cm soft tissue density just left lateral to the AP window. This demonstrates borderline hypermetabolic activity of SUV 2.5 and is non-specific. Had the CT's done on schedule to watch for 2 years. No changes. Everything ok. I was a pack a day smoker then and only an occasional smoker since (but still smoked!). Anyway over the past 3 weeks I started feeling odd (Burning lower back, light headed) . At first it felt like a prostate infection (which I've had before). Went to Urologist. Said no infection. Thought it may then be new blood pressure meds my Family Doctor put me on or a Kidney infection. Went to him, he took me off the new BP pills and things seemed to feel better. Put me back on the old BP meds. Urine was clear. Now, Yesterday at work, My vision seemed blurred (like I have sinus pressure in my face), lower back pain back, some burning in chest front and back, and some very very slight coughing, but not real shortness of breath. I am going to see my family doctor Monday 1st thing and ask fot the works...blood tests, xray, ct, etc! So of course now, you know whats going through my mind. I had weird dreams last night too...probably because the LUNG CANCER sign is flashing in my brain and I can't concentrate on anything else! I am worried that the "thing" on my lung has decided to "activate" and now it may be too late. I sit here Saturday morning not being able to concentrate on anything else! I found comfort here last time, so I'm back. I am not looking for a diagnosis (we'll let the doctors do that). I am just looking to tell someone what's going on. I think about my family if something happens to me! Will they lose the house, car, or whatever? How long can I continue to work and keep the household working? Will my ST disability and LT disability be enough to keep us going? Social Security? I know I am jumping the gun! I am a Catholic and have tried to give my worry to God, but it keeps comming back to me! I think "Why did I ever put a cigarette in my mouth!" What an idiot! I know you will tell me that there is no reason to be upset or anxious without a proper diagnosis, but what else could it be? Thank you for letting me write this. I feel better just writing this. I am going to try and take my mind off of it this weekend. Daughter has soccer games today and grass needs to be cut. Maybe part of the pain and sensations is the anxiety in my head! I hope I can report good news next week. If you are inclined to reply, I would like to how to cope at this point! Words of wisdom? Thanks for the opportunity to be part of this awesome site! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ts Posted March 12, 2011 Share Posted March 12, 2011 Frank, One of my least favorite things is seeing a new hello on Friday night or Saturday and having it from someone who has yet to be Dx but with concern. I can only imagine how difficult it is to wait until the week starts to get something in action. I was initially Dx in the ER as a surprise and tried to maintain that it would be something benign (a hair ball, for instance) for many weeks. One of the first people I told about the Dx said, get some anti-anxiety meds to get you through to surgery/beginning of treatment. I thought I would not need them, but crying in the middle of the work day showed otherwise. I did not use them long, but it was nice to have it available. As you said, try not to get to far ahead of yourself. Enjoy your family time. Once you find out what is going on, please let us know, either way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dianew Posted March 12, 2011 Share Posted March 12, 2011 Frank - I won't tell you not to be worried or anxious because I know you will be, but the fact is it could be anything. I am sorry you are facing this worry, especially over the weekend -- everyone here knows well the anxiety you are dealing with. You are already on the right track - go to your daughter's game, mow the lawn, stay busy - do things you enjoy doing. As my Dad always said, try not to put the cart before the horse. Will be thinking positive thoughts. Please keep us posted. Diane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joppette Posted March 12, 2011 Share Posted March 12, 2011 Hi Frank, I'm so glad you wrote your anxiety out here. Sometimes it just helps to write it out and face it. I agree that you should go live this weekend, and enjoy your family. Remember that lung cancer is not a death sentence. There are so many stories of hope here that just amaze me. I've found enormous peace in my faith. I believe that he is in control, and I trust him with my life. I do not project into the future the "what ifs" because I can't know my future, none of us can. And please don't kick yourself around about the smoking. I learned from this site, that the statistics of lung cancer are such that the experts don't really know what triggers this disease. Yes, some smokers get it. But why don't all smokers get it? And TONS of non-smokers get it. And statiscally, the age of new diagnosis is so much younger than it used to be. Why? Lung cancer is the most under funded, under researched cancer of all of them. There is much they don't know. And those of us that smoked need to give ourselves a break for that. God bless, Have a wonderful worry free weekend! MI Judy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikkala Posted March 12, 2011 Share Posted March 12, 2011 Hi Frank, Glad to see you are gonna go and advocate for yourself. I was on that watch and see thing for 5 yrs and luckily I am no longer watching and waiting, it was nothing... But I DO understand the worrying and am sorry you have to go thru it at all. Hope you are able to enjoy your family this weekend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phranc2002 Posted March 13, 2011 Author Share Posted March 13, 2011 Thanks for the replies. They have helped with this anxiety. To know there are people out there to confide in makes you feel better. I know it could be a multitude of things. It's just that history scares me. I will try not to beat myself up over the smoking thing. Going fishing with my neighbor now...Maybe a day on the water will help clear my head. Have a great Sunday everyone! Frank Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaminkw Posted March 13, 2011 Share Posted March 13, 2011 Frank, my list of what to do has all been said or done: Say it outloud, translated write your fears down for us to hear; try anti-anxiety meds at least to get thru the nights, sleep is vital to coping; and distraction, distraction, distraction--every minute you are fully engaged in something else is a minute you are not worrying. Judy in KW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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