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From Don Wood

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Don Wood

Joined: 09 Jan 2003

Posts: 1

Posted: 10 Jan 2003 07:31 pm    Post subject:


Hi, Don Wood here. This is the third time I have posted this info, but each time it was on a new message board. My wife was diagnosed with NSCLC in October, with mets to the bones. Actually, there is only a trace of the cancer in her lungs. She has had radiation for three of the five known bone mets to prevent bone fracture and/or reduce pain. She has had 2 rounds of chemo (carboplatin & taxotere). The first went fine, but the second really put her down. She has been in the hospital for dehydration and/or infections three times in December, for a total of about 25 days, including Christmas in ICU. I got her home last Saturday and she is progressing slowly. I have had to learn how to be a nurse! I am a prostate cancer survivor, but my events were not so dramatic as hers. We will meet with the oncologist Tuesday to see where we are and where we are going with this. We both have good support systems, so I am hopeful. We have three grown children, and they are coping fiarly well. I am trying to regain some normalcy and control in at least a small part of my life, so I can bear the rest. Would like to hear from other caregivers and how they are doing. Thanks. Don


68-yr old, married 43 yrs, wife has NSCLC (diag. 10/02) w. bone mets. I am 7-yr. prostate cancer survivor and 5-yr. heart bypass surgery survivior. Three adult children and 2 grandchildren. I am trained caregiver.Back to top

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Welcome. I have been a lurker on the original board since my mom was diagnosed with sclc in December, 2001. I posted once on the last board, and just registered with this one today. It may take a while for everyone to journey over here from the last board.

I am sorry to read about your wife, especially since she has had a difficult month in December, but it's good to hear she is doing well now. I am sure she is very thankful to have you there, especially after all you have been through yourself!

My mom is 66, did chemo and rad, and is doing very well. She has been in complete response since ending trtmnt in May '02.

I'm glad that we have this forum to support each other as we support our loved ones!


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My dad was diagnosed in January-orig. with SCLC, but in October when he had a follow up CAT scan that showed the chemo was ineffective, but the tumors (L Lung 1/R Lung 2, mets to spine-which shrunk enough to relieve pain) had grown very slightly. The oncologist was confused, because Dad looked so good and felt so good, so he ordered another biopsy-first one was a needle biopsy of the spine, this time he ordered a needle of the lung. It came back this time as NSCLC, so this enabled him to go on IRESSA. Just before Christmas he showed signs of brain mets (really poor coordination, he kept bumping into things and when he ate he had a hard time getting the fork to his mouth-very scary. MRI showed 3 mets. He got Gamma Knife on Thursday and went home on Friday. Now we're waiting to see what comes up next. Its like your always watching, so you don't miss anything that needs to be taken care of. I have decided NOT to keep wondering whats next, and when something pops up-we'll do what we can to take care of it. Otherwise its like living in fear waiting for the other shoe to drop, which is pointless. We have to take each day as it comes, as much as you want to know what the future holds, you just can't. Which sucks. So all I can say is that it has helped me to cope by just being sure to tell him I love him, letting my kids see him ALOT and reminding myself that we thought he would have succomed to the cancer a LONG time ago, or been really sick from the treatment. So, on the good days we take full advantage and on the bad days we take care of business. My thoughts are with you all. My dad figures that whether he gets a year or two, who knows, there is so much research going on that if he could hold out a year or two, by then there may be a cure or something that will get him more time. He said he'll be a guinea pig if thats what it takes. He's game. And if he could handle it so well, who are we to sit around feeling sorry for him or ourselves? My mom asked me "why your father, he's such a good man." I said "why ANYONE? Noone deserves to get sick. What, would you wish it away from him and on someone else? You can't, it's wrong. Unfortuantly good people get sick, it dosn't work out that the 'bad people' of the world get sick and the good don't. But the good people have a great advantage- good people have loved ones to help them through it. Good people have God on their side. Even the ones that don't believe it, they have people on this board searching for answers and support, prayers and hope. We are the good guys. Take strength in that. Lean when you need to lean, and offer support when it is needed. We're in this together. Take care, Deb

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Hello Don,

I to am a veteran of the message board.... Mom was diagnosed with NSCLC stage 3b in September of 02....We started radiation in November and now she is at stage 4.

This disease is a terrible thing and all we can do is try our best to take care of the ones we love. It sounds to me that you have been through a lot your self and now this. I know that at times you figure "enough is enough, why us?"

You also sound to be a strong minded person who can get things done. Hang in there Don.

The people on this board are amazing. They can help you through just about anything. I'll keep you in my prayers like I do everyone else on here.

Renee :lol:

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Hi to all-I wanted to say something about what Debaroo said about why does ANYONE get cancer.You are right it can happen to all-good or bad. For me at the age of 44 I had no idea why it had to be me, I don't remember really questioning why-My mom always said I was Scarlet O'Hara. "Oh I will think about that tomorrow" :D After about 2-3 months I realised that I had had lots of things in my past that I had gotten thru due to my relationsip to Christ and each time I became a stronger person due to it. This was just another of those things. I told my friends I had 2 choices one was to die as a Christian, and secondly- if God saw fit to let me live awile I would use that time to be a testimony to Him. SO HERE I AM. Now I have to follow thru. That's what I get for saying that :lol:

The one thing that scares me more than just about anything is giving speeches!!!!!!! No body ever asked me to do it before this happened, NOW I have had do it several times. OH well! I believe I am just a tool God has used that is my "WHY"

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  • 3 weeks later...

This really goes under "Taking Charge". Lucie, my wife, had to stop chemo treatment all of December and January because of infections and such. She is now to the point where two of the bone mets are beginning to give her pain again, indicating the cancer is growing. My goal was to get her well enough to restart her chemo. She takes morphine for pain, but if she takes too much, she gets nauseated. So we try to find the medium that will give her the most relief without the nausea. Anyway, I took her to the oncologist last week and he said they could start chemo as soon as the surgeon says he can put in a port. We went to the sorgeon today and he says he can put it in as soon as the oncologist (whom we are to see again Thursday) schedules the chemo. I said, "Can you two doctors talk on the phone and get this all scheduled?" (The hospital also has to be in the loop because it is outpatient surgery.) He says, "Yes, we can do that." I said, "Can you do it today?" He says, "Oh, yes". I said, "Now?" And he says, "Yes", and it was done. We are scheduled for port Tuesday and chemo Wednesday of next week. The caregiver sometimes has to step in and take charge of the process. Anybody else have this kind of experience? I know the doctors are busy, and understand that. We really do have to "squeak" if we want the "oil"! Don

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Don, I am with you, the squeaky wheel gets the oil, truer words were never spoken. It is frustrating when you KNOW a situation is urgent and the doctors see it as "routine"; "par for the course", nothing is routine when its YOUR loved ones life on the line. So it is our job to remind them. GOOD FOR YOU!!! I hope that if the S#%! hits the fan and I should ever "need oil", my husband squeaks as LOUD AS POSSIBLE!!! You and your wife are in my prayers, I know its difficult to keep those doctors on their toes, but you're doing a fine job. I'm sending warm thoughts your way. Take care, Deb

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