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Caregiver: living day by day, and why today is a good day


md6183

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I'm not the patient, I'm the caregiver for my wife battling Stage IV. It's been a really rough past few weeks, and this morning my thoughts of the future for my wife were filled with fear of the unknown. We have been making strong efforts to just concentrate and focus on living and enjoying each day by itself. So I thought of some things that will make today a good day, and wrote them down. I wanted to share them with others too, maybe it will lend some perspective.

I get to hear her voice; I get to look into her eyes; I get to hold her hand; I get to kiss her lips; I get to stroke her hair; and I get to tell her "I love you" and to hear the same words back to me.

What else could I ask for in life for today? Yes, today is a good day. :D

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Hi Mike,

What a nice post,good to hear from you.I agree with you,its the simple things in life you cannot buy,that are the most important.Please pass onto your wife my best wishes,hope you both have a wonderful festive season and may 2013 be a vintage year for you both.

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Thank you so much for sharing this with us! And I agree that it's the simple things that are so very important.

I too was the caregiver for my husband who had stage IV. I remember the most beautiful moment when he opened his eyes and ask me if I would marry him again :)

Wishing the very best for you and your wife. Please visit us often and let us know how you're both doing.

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That is truly very sweet and filled with gratitude, something most of us lack even when we try. So thank you for reminding us all of how the little, precious things count, and weigh more than anything else. Have a blessed festive season and all the best wishes for 2013 to you both!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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Thanks to all who posted such kind responses. This past week was the bottom of the proverbial barrel for my wife. On Nov 19 she had an IM rod 16" long inserted in left femur because lesion there was nearing a break, one week later began ten rounds of radiation, all the while off chemo. This past Monday was final radiation day, very next day into new chemo (Taxotere) to attack other lesions, with Neulasta the following day. We know from past chemos that Neulasta brings severe bone pain for her, so Friday was the pits. Yesterday improvement, today some more improvement. No more chemo until January 2! Our son to be married on January 26, so plenty of time to recover after the next chemo, hopefully. Faith is our foundation of hope for comfort and peace. Looking forward to Christmas and New Year to relax and enjoy with family and friends, hopefully feeling a bit normal. Best Holiday season wishes to all of you too!

Mike

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Sounds like maybe the worst is passed - for the moment anyway. I HATED the Neulasta - so I really feel for her. Sounds like you both have a lot to look forward to in the next few weeks. Hope you have a wonderful holiday! What a nice thing to have the wedding to look forward to. Great start to the New Year.

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

It's the week before the wedding! I hope your bride is feeling much better this week and will enjoy watching her baby boy take a bride of his own. I think parents of the groom get a bit more relaxing than the bride's, but if she over does it, remind her to rest and enjoy.

Be well,

Mary

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  • 1 month later...

I have not posted much on this site since joining last Fall, but I have continued to view only, and I again applaud the support available here, especially from the regulars and moderators who continue to support others after their battle or support needs have passed or diminished.

My wife Kathy was dx at age 50 on Aug 9, 2012 with Stage IV NSCLC adenocarcinoma. During the past seven months, she has received extensive testing and radiation and chemo treatments at Jefferson Univ Hospital in Phila PA, from a wonderful groups of doctors and nurses. Even so, the third PET scan in mid February still showed significant progression of disease, and the pain, which never left, was continuing to escalate. Heartbreaking and difficult, Kathy made the decision to forego further treatment in hopes of maintaining a higher quality of life. Last week she began hospice care in our home, and after some trial and error, the pain management appears to be working. Our religious faith continues to sustain us, and we thank everyone on this site for their interest, caring, sharing, and love for others in this difficult battle. I'm still living day by day according to the words I wrote here a few months ago, recognizing that every day with her is a good day. May all of you also be blessed with those you love and care about.

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Thank you so much for the update on you and your wife dear one. Reading this felt like I was reading my own story. I understand how difficult this is for both of you. Well "ALL" understand here.

I was glad to see that the pain management is helping your wife. Pain is not something she should have to endure.

I'm concerned about you as well because I know very well how difficult it is being a caregiver. I myself survived on approx 3 hrs a day of sleep. I had no one to help me until hospice came in and that didn't happen until the last 10 days even though I had 9 months of care giving. Please remember that you need to take care of yourself too :wink:

Please keep us updated ((hugs))

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  • 2 weeks later...

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