Jump to content

How to keep from going insane. (Some are a little edgy.)


teresag

Recommended Posts

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In."

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the Memo field of all your checks, write "Payment In Full for One Soul."

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with prophecy."

8. Dont use any punctuation

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Ask people what gender they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

11. Specify repeatedly that your drive-thru order is "to go."

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your co-workers address you by your pro wrestling name, Granite Grizzly.

17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won, I won!"

18. When leaving the Zoo, run towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner, "I'm sorry kids, but due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.