Guest DavidA Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND, IN THE PROCESS, GRANDCHILDREN) > > > >To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our > >own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something > >to make you chuckle. > > > >Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from > >the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own > >children. > > > >After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the > >first thing he said was "DON'T!" > > > >"Don't what?" Adam replied. > > > >"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said. > > > >"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have > >forbidden fruit!!!!!" > > > >"No Way!" > > > >"Yes way!" > > > >"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God. > > > >"Why" > > > >"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why > >He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes > >later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked! > > > >"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked. > > > >"Uh huh," Adam replied. > > > >"Then why did you?" said the Father. > > > >"I don't know," said Eve. > > > >"She started it!" Adam said > > > >"Did not!" > > > >"Did too!" > > > >"DID NOT!" > > > >Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam > >and >Eve > >should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it > >has never changed. > > > > > >BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY! > > > >If you have persistently and! lovingly tried to give children wisdom > >and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had > >trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of > >cake for you? > > > > > > >THINGS TO THINK ABOUT! > > > > > >1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk > >and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down > >and shut >up. > > > >2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children. > > > >3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young. > > > >4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word > >for word what you shouldn't have said. > > > >5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind > >yourself that there are children more awful than your own. > > > >6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in. > > > > > > >ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your > >nursing home one day. > > > > > > >AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO >WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: > > > >"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN" > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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