ColleenRae Posted August 23, 2018 Share Posted August 23, 2018 I'm advancing here... Moved from the "newbie / introduce yourself" forum to NSCLC I have a lot of catching up to do, but not enough time. I was given a "preliminary" diagnosis based upon Lung CT in July of Stage 1a adenocarcinoma / BAC NSCLC at a Early Detection Lung Cancer Prevention Clinic in Seattle. I was then referred to U of WA Medical Center to meet with a Thoracic Surgeon to discuss a lobectomy in less than a week following the lung CT. I was led to believe this was all due to necessity of what was found, and everyone seemed to think I'd be on board for surgery the first week in August. I was in shock. I was in denial. I didn't feel qualified or ready to make a decision that fast and wanted time to research / decide if possible. I then learned the UW surgeon was leaving for vacation, which was probably the real reason behind the urgency to schedule surgery (out of courtesy to me, I'm sure...!) Sorry if I sound cynical - I'm just not that trusting with the medical community at all times. In any case, I have been looking for additional opinions. I have established myself with a local pulmonologist that I feel very comfortable with. He gave me referrals to a local Radiologist and a Cardio Thoracic surgeon for second opinions. I have met with the radiologist and I will meet with the surgeon next week. The radiologist said he wouldn't touch me with radiation until the tumor could be biopsied and definitely diagnosed. I respected him for that answer! Problem is, the tumor is too small to biopsy and I've been told the location is difficult as well and will require a lobectomy to remove it. The radiologist said he would first start with a PET Scan (despite the false neg's / pos's that can result). He also said if he was in this situation he thinks he'd probably have radiation vs lobectomy due to the complications and morbidity rates associated with the procedure... so that left me more confused. The local cardio/thoracic surgeon I've been referred to is older (around 70) and has an impressive background - BUT very few lobectomies. Primarily cardio surgeries, so I'm already not feeling this will be the answer, but I'll be interested to get his opinion / viewpoint. The first surgeon I met from UWMC sounds very qualified. His office has / had scheduled me for a PET scan 9/13 in Seattle, with an appt a few hours later with the surgeon to review the results and another appt that afternoon with pre-surg/anesth. I'm still not sure that's the route I want to go. The told me it would be "better" if I had my PET scan at their facility. My local Dr. said no - and the radiologist here said no - I can have it done anywhere. So, I decided to have it done here this Friday. I am already experiencing the all-too-familiar "scanxiety" emotions, but I'll be glad to get this done with and move forward. My local pulmonologist said he will have the PET results ready to view / discuss at their Monday a.m. chest conference. I've sent a message to the surgeon at the UWMC to let him know. In addition, I have a 3rd consult scheduled with another highly regarded and experienced thoracic surgeon the day after Labor Day. So, I'm looking forward to that appointment as well. I want the different opinions, but I also feel like I might be trying to stall the inevitable. I don't want to deal with this. I don't want to acknowledge that any of this is real. But I know a decision is around the corner. I have been worried about the recovery (and now, even surviving!) a lobectomy. I have worried as my 20 y.o. son (Autism) is taking fall qtr off from college to help me when I come back home. I have also had a very generous offer from a married couple I know here - but not well - locally who have offered to take care of me in their guest room when I come back from surgery... I was moved to tears by their generosity. I'm hoping I won't really need to take them up on their offer... I'm not used to asking for help. I like to give help if needed, but have never felt comfortable asking others. This is a hard thing for me. Psychologically, I am not a good candidate for cancer, being sick, needing help, etc. Ha! Too bad. I have no choice. I am afraid of the surgery and keep thinking maybe, if possible, radiation would be a better choice for me if they'll do it. I've read that the OS rate is lower for radiation though. Just scared that once I have this surgery, all will go downhill from there. Right now I feel healthy (except for all of the wildfire smoke we're having!). I'm still trying to pretend this isn't happening. I also want to know is this or isn't this cancer? All indicators say that it is. But what kind? It sounds like surgery with lymph node dissection is going to be required to get those answers I need. Sorry this is so long. I think I needed it more for me - a place to write this all down / to think. I'm just going through so many emotions. I cry often; especially when I go to bed and first thing in the a.m. when I wake up. I'm already tired from all of the research, phone calls, appointments, etc. - and this is just the beginning! My mood swings have been awful - one minute I'm fine and composed and then something will set me off - stress me out - and I'm a mess. I got upset yesterday because I forgot something at the grocery store... I went into the bathroom and beat my hairbrush on the sink counter until I broke the handle off! NOT like me at all to do this in the past. But, I have to admit, it actually made me feel good when I broke it! Maybe I need a boxing / punching bag... but then I wouldn't get to use it for a while after surgery, so better not waste the $!! That's what I hate.. that's a perfect example... Now it seems I can't make any decisions or plan for anything in the future because I am always always reminded of what may lie ahead... Cancer. I hate this. Whine. I know all of us do. Thanks for indulging me...! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.