Jump to content

just a rough day


Recommended Posts

Just having a rough morning and thought I would post; my hubby's eye is ok thank goodness but the relentless pain he is in is awful I don't think the morphine is working and he doesn't want to take more;  I guess to be blunt is that I see my husband getting worse as the weeks go by and I can do nothing to stop it--I truly don't think Keytruda has kicked in; he has been in pain for 5wks this Tuesday.  We have palliative care appointment this Tuesday and another infusion the following Tuesday.  He did eat breakfast this morning but then went back to bed.  Maybe I'm just too sensitive and l look at every detail of his day--how much has he eaten--how much came back up--did he have a bowel movement--what is your pain level--does he have a fever--I don't feel like the wife I feel like a nurse and I hate it--I want to be a wife. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry, bes.  It really is difficult to see a loved one in pain and be unable to do much about it.  And I know what it's like to feel more like a nurse than a partner.  It's exhausting and can be depressing.  

Any chance you can take some time to do something for yourself?  It's a beautiful day outside (I'm in NJ too--down near Philadelphia).  Maybe even a walk would lift your spirits a bit.  Or maybe escape into a good book or video while he's resting.  It sounds as if you're doing all you can for him, and it doesn't help either of you for you to sink into the pain, too.

Are there any caregiver support groups near you?  The place where he's being treated might know of some--never hurts to ask.    

Sending a hug and good thoughts.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Bes, I'm sorry that things are so rough right now.  When does he see his oncologist again?  If the Keytruda doesn't work, is there another plan for him?  I know this is tough on you, but your husband is very blessed to have a spouse who is watching over him.  All of those details are important - they help his medical team help him.  My husband was/is the same way.  Please know I'm thinking about you, and hope that Tuesday's palliative care appointment brings some relief.


Link to comment
Share on other sites


My wife didn't enjoy her three years of nursing me through lung cancer treatments. And I was not a compliant or cooperative patient.  Being a caregiver for one with lung cancer is hard. Taking care of a loved one is arduous in the extreme.

Your role is vital. We are all hoping Keytruda kicks in. Take a break, then steel yourself for the nursing road ahead.

Stay the course.


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi, bes,

I hope that things are getting a bit better this week. We're thinking of you. Please check back in when you can!

With gratitude,

Digital Community Manager
LUNGevity Foundation

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just checking in it's been a rough week so glad we have dr appointment tomorrow. Yesterday was really bad I think we should have gone to the ER but he insisted it wasn't necessary.  He was extremely nauseous all day, in pain level 4-5 and difficulty breathing--he just couldn't seem to get the nausea under control even with medication; today he is a little better.  He is now complaining of pain in his back and there is a lump on his right back and it is tender to the touch--don't even want to think what that might be. Will update tomorrow.

Thanks for all the replies

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.