Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Soscared

New To Forum & Terrified ! questions

Recommended Posts

Hi All, I’m almost 66 , been a Heavy smoker for at least 50 years , I’m NOT proud of that by any means though ..... I have Panic Disorder, especially when it comes to my Health. My Husband is a Disabled Veteran, on Oxygen for Asbestosis.  In July 2017 , I had to get a chest X-ray . The Dr office called me , said they Found SOMEONE on my Lung .  They wanted to do a CT but I refused.  My Husband & we’re raising our Beautiful ( now 9 years old ) Granddaughter, my Only Child being a Single Dad with Sole Custody. CPS had been Involved in our live previous, due to Mothets Abuse.... it was NOT a good explanation!    Since she was 2 years old WE have Raised her , our Son would come & go ...... I I Quit going to most Any Dr , I was afraid that if my Son got in Trouble ( he has PTSD & ? ).   That CPS would be back in our life so ... I didn’t want to get a Diagnosis Of “ Anything “ & give CPS an Excuse to take her from us !    So fast forward I had to go to the ER A few months ago , they did s chest X-ray & said I had a mass on my upper right lung. 2.7 .... I knew I had it but didn’t know the Size or Anything else . My Son is Cruel & Vindictive, he took our Granddaughter 3 weeks ago , will not let us see her or talk to her so, I go to a Dr appt today & find out the mass in July of 2017 was 2.-1 , it’s Growing !    I also read the radiologist report , it said ILL DEFINED MASS UPPER RIGHT LOBE  , Probability of being malignant Very High , recommend a CT for further diagnosis!   Needless to say , I’m TERRIFIED !   My sister was given 2 to 5 years & passed away in 9 months ......   I quit smoking but as I was talking to my sisters widower ( married 30 years ) he said WHY BOTHER?   Your sister Quit, watched her go through Anxiety, Depression etc.... than passed away 18 months After she quit , he said the Damage is Done “ !   I started smoking Again .....  the radiologist That said that is very well known however I never knew they could tell that much from an X-ray. I’ve been researching the internet All Day ( I also have OCD ).  Every thing I’ve read is NOT IN MY FAVOR , most likely Cancer !    I swore I would NEVER have Chemo or Radiation & stick by it now ..... I don’t know if I want to get a CT or just let it be what it is ?   I’m Depressed, Heartbroken & Devastated Without my Grandchild .  I had One child , one Grandchild that I felt like wS my Own , now I have LOST both at the same time ......I’m Mourning & don’t know if I really want to go on .....     much less in Fear & Doubt for the rest of my Time about Trusting the Dr.s etc....   my Sister ( in the end ) we found out. That she had a Money Hungry Dr. !       He gave her a Last Chemo Treatment, the minute it was Finished, he told her   There was NOTHING more they could do for her , go check in to the Hospital...... she Never came home from the Hospital..... she Suffered a Lot with the Chemo & Radiation, no Quality Of Life for those last 9 months .    Sorry it’s such a Long post but trying to give the Whole picture.   Anyone have any Suggestions, Anything Positive I could Cling to ?   The mass has went from 2.1 to 2.7  since July of 2017  ?   When I did go to the Dr today , I asked the size in 2017 but I was in Total Shock when I read the Report saying HIGH PROBABILITY OF MALIGNANCY !  I didn’t EXPECT that ..   please tell me “ something “ ?    I pray for each & every one of you for Possible Things to come your way ..    THANK YOU 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi, and welcome.

Yes, cancer, or even the possibility of cancer, is scary.  All you know right now, though, is that you might have cancer  in one lobe.  It's been a year and a half and since it's grown only a bit more than half a centimeter, it's not growing that fast.  

So.  There's a possibility, if it hasn't spread outside the lung, that the only treatment you would need would be surgery to remove part of your lung.  That's what happened with me.  No chemo, nothing but regular scans to make sure everything stays fine.  I had my surgery a year and a half ago and honestly, I don't feel any different.  The surgery was simple and the recovery fast.  If it turns out to have spread, though, there are a lot of treatment options out there.  Not everyone has the same type of cancer, nor do they all have the same reactions to treatment.  What I'm trying to say is that your sister's experience, sad as it was, would not necessarily be the same as yours.  

The point is, you know very little at this point.  It makes sense to move forward with diagnostic tests and then start making decisions based on all the information you can get.  You don't have that much to go on right now.  I won't sugarcoat--chances are that a nodule that size will turn out to be cancer.  But it's not a death sentence and even if you need additional treatment you can have good quality of life.  We have lots of people on the forum that are doing well with ongoing treatment.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, and regarding the smoking.  I, too, was a longtime smoker, but continuing to smoke after a cancer diagnosis is very bad for the prospects of recovery.  Shortly before my diagnosis I had switched to e-cigarettes, which my doctors consider to make me a "non-smoker."  If you successfully quit before, it would be best if you could do that.  But if you find it impossible, switching to an e-cigarette MIGHT be the next best thing.  Just a thought.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi LexiCat, I really appreciate your reply .... you Obviously are Right about what you said as well. I’m so Negative ( part of the Depression) no Medication has worked for me .    I’ve been done really WRONG by 3 Dr.s  & that make me very Apprehensive about Dr.s.   I’m having a Pity Party this morning.    The First Time  in 3 weeks we get to pick our Grandchild up & have her spend the night , not only am I Obsessing about my Lung but , I didn’t get ANY sleep last night .   I have as I said Arthritis ( waiting on bloodwork to confirm type ).  I can’t move my left arm today , my shoulder is THROBBING so BAD !!!  I don’t know if it’s RA or Fibromyalgia but of ALL times ?   I NEED this Special Time with her, she’s the Best Medicine I could ask for but .....Thank You So Very Much for your reply & Reading my “ Vents “ .... HUGS & PRAYERS 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...