berisa Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 I can say, my dad's cancer is as tough as himself. Today the doctor told us that the brain tumor relapses (not sure is the same original location or the nearby location) and half of his brain is swelling that now they give him the maximum dosage of steriod. Most likely tomorrow the neurosurgeon will come to see my dad. I am just wondering how can the cancer relapses in such a fast pace. My dad just finished the craniotomy on 1/9 and from the later PET scan shown the craniotomy is successful and my dad recovers very well. I know normally, WBR is followed by craniotomy but since my dad had PCI previously that WBR is not an pro-surgery treatment for him and what oncologist could do is keeping an eye on his brain. I guess no one believes it relapses in just 1 month. The size of the brain tumor is almost the same as last time. The location is not sure same as last time bcoz the oncologist didn't tell clearly. I just want to know, did someone have the same experience with my dad that recurrence after craniotomy? Or did anyone hear about that? Is it common for people who do several craniotomies? What is the best treatment to treat the recurrence? Craniotomy again or Gamma Knife? Radiotherapy or Chemo? Actually, I know Gamma knife is kind of Radiosurgery. But one oncologist told us (2 months ago) that since my dad still had the brain mets after PCI done, that means my dad's tumor is resistant to radiation. Is that true? Then in this sense, will Gamma knife work on my dad? My dad doesn't feel really unhappy and me too. We just blame why this happen on him. My dad accepts this truth and told us prepare his gone within few months. He seems to accept this is his fate. One good thing is, my dad's original lung tumor is stable. The size is the same. I just think, my dad didn't even start the 2nd line chemo and his lung is stable, then if the brain tumor didn't relapse, it will be good. I dont' know what to do now and next. It seems that I can do nothing to help him. I have no idea at this moment and I think we are losing. It is really unfair....my dad is so young and he is too lovely and he always do everything only for the family, he has no close friends...everyday after work, he came home and for around 10years, he prepared the dinner every night and every weekend he did all the housework. He is a kind man, a lovely man, a generous man, a father and husband who never think of himself first and who always put us as his first priority. He never has a chance to enjoy life. Everytime when I think about his kindness, I cry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MO_Sugar Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 (((((Berisa))))), I am so sorry your Dad is going through all of this. I am praying that they have a simple answer or solution to the latest problems. God Bless you all, MO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hollyridge Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Listen to you Dad. He is telling you that he is strong and he wants you to hang in there. This is a horrible disease and it shows no favoritism to anyone. You are so lucky to have a father who is such a wonderful example to you and your family. I know it is so hard to understand why such a wonderful person would have to suffer an illness like this. There is no answer. There is only faith and hope and trust in the Almighty. God bless you and your father. I will pray for your sadness to turn to hope and strength. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe B Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Berisa, I am so sorry to hear about the sitiuation with your Dad. He sounds like a very wonderful man, i hope that the time you have together is memorable and a blessing to you... I will continue in prayers for you and your Dad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pritchie Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Berisa, I am so sorry that your family has to go through this. You, your Dad and your family are in my prayers. Pamela Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheresaKB Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Berisa, I am so sorry to hear about your Dad's relapse. Please know that your Dad will be included in my prayers. Praying for miracles, Theresa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
natalie Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Berisa, I'm so sorry about the recent news. I hate cancer. I don't know enough to give you advice other than I bet he can have the Gamma Knife if the tumor is not too large. Until you can get more answers, I would keep using those herbal treatments. They can't hurt and you know, they just might work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest It's Fay A. Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Berisa, I am very sorry. I remember and your Father in my prayers each day, and I'm hoping that his doctors will be able to treat the recurrent brain mets successfully. Fay A. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hebbie Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Berisa, I am so sorry that your father is going through this right now. I will be praying for you and your family that your father can make it through this recent setback and return to good health! You are in my thoughts! Heather Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 I am very saddened to hear about your father's latest news. It is clear that he is a wonderful man, as he has a wonderful daughter-you! Your caring for your father is testament to that. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Dear Berisa, I to am sadden to hear the news about your wonderful dad. Please let you dad know that he has MANY MANY friends he hasn't even met yet. I feel like I know your wonderful dad, just by all the wonderful things you have shared with us. He has friends from ALL OVER THE WORLD!!! My prayers are still with you both. Stay strong and God Bless. Give dad a HUG from this FRIEND. (((DAD))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrea B. Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Dearest Berisa, I am so very sorry to hear about the reoccurence! It too makes me so sad that our dear loved ones have to endure so much. I will be keeping your beloved dad in my prayers for healing and strength. You too will be in my prayers. We are all here for you. Blessings and hugs to you! Andrea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandyS Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Hugs for Berisa and prayers for her dad........... Hang in there, SandyS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karen335 Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Berissa, I am sorry to hear the news about your father. He is strong and will beat this disease. Keep the fith and just believe. Your father does have many friends her in this site. We are here for you and your dad. Many prayers for dad and you... God Bless, Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharyn Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Dear Berrisa - So sorry to hear that Dad is not doing well. You speak of such a wonderful man and it is so beautiful to read your words. Your Dad is also lucky to have a daughter who loves and cares for him as you do. I will remember you both in my prayers. Love, Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mayos Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 I've been reading your dad's story as it unfolds and I'd just like to say you are both very lucky to have each other. One thing is for certain.....if there is a way on this earth to help your father regain his health and remain with you and your family....you will find it. You are one tenacious advocate to have around...that's for sure. Like so many others here.... I am also in the wings rooting for you both. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Z_Pacific Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Hi Berisa, It appears that his daughter is just as strong as his cancer too and that he has passed down to you the same beautiful gifts that you attribute to him. I agree with you that what happens to people dealing with cancer is not fare – but who said that life was fair anyways. I always try and look for the good in every situation (got it from my mom, who we lost to cancer 10 years ago). As difficult as it is to see there is good embodied in your fight. Fighting this demon brings forward strengths you never knew you had, it brings you closer to those you love and makes you appreciate all the more the moments you share together. We are all placed on this earth for a limited amount. Under normal circumstances we go about our daily routines and fail to realize just how important those near to us really are. When faced with their mortality or are own we move into another dimension of love and caring squeezing each moment we share as a precious piece of the puzzle we call life. I know that dealing with my cancer has given me a new focus on life and what to do with the time that I have left. I thank God for each moment I have with my family and don’t try and question what is going on – I simply try and get the most out of it. God Bless, Howard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berisa Posted February 25, 2004 Author Share Posted February 25, 2004 Thank you all your kind words. All touched my heart and I really thank GOD having you all walking with me. Howard, your words are very beautiful and it really encourages me to hang in and relieves the sad emotion. On top of that, I think all your prayers are working. All the prayers are coming to GOD that HE listens. There is a light a hope coming in today. Two days before, the oncologist told us from the brain CT, there is a shadow and it is tumor. So yesterday the oncologist passed my dad's case to neurosurgeon and see what to do next to help my dad. Yesterday when the neurosurgeon came to see my dad, she told the oncologist, there is a bleeding inside my dad's brain but it is not a "equal mark" to the shadow is tumor. It may be bleeding only ~~ Hope comes in!! Today morning, my sister and mom went to grab the neurosurgeon to ask what's going on. My sister saw the neurosurgeon wrote "Tumor bleeding ?" Thank GOD, it is still a question mark. Afterwards, my mom and sis grapped the senior neurosurgeon and he answered as of now, they cannot be sure whether there is a tumor that causing bleeding. It can be bleeding only. They will arrange another brain CT scan with dye injection to make it certain few days later. He said, there is no immediate danger to death. So, now has 2 possibilities, one is bleeding only, one is new tumor bleeding. I just want this be settled as soon as possible, no matter which is the fact bcoz if tumor, i don't want to let it grow anymore, if bleeding, i don't want that will affect him paralysis or even death. Please keep your fingers cross for him and I think GOD may listen to all of us. Will keep you all updated. Thank you again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karenl Posted February 25, 2004 Share Posted February 25, 2004 Berisa So glad to hear that things may not be as bleak as you had feared!! I am hoping with you that the problem is something other than a tumour, and can be easily rectified! Sending lots of positive thoughts to your family. Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berisa Posted February 27, 2004 Author Share Posted February 27, 2004 I saw my dad's medical history, found that they wrote "Delayed bleeding at the operation site, Tumor bleeding?" As of now, we still don't know and the neurosurgeon told us to relax, she said since my dad's brain is bleeding and it really takes time (in weeks) to drain the blood first on himself for a more clear CT scan check. My dad these few days has delusions, this happened once last year while he received the second round of chemo treatment with radiation. His eyes are greatly affected by pressure on optical nerve and he cannot see things well that it worsens his consciousness. I found some articles related "Steriod-induced mental disturbances", I just guess that my dad is suffered from the high dosage. Now neurosurgeon reduced the dosage but my dad still has delusions. The neurosurgeon will refer my dad to meet specialist on mental. Actually, last year we brought my dad to meet a private mental specialist and he said my dad is fine. Last year, this symptom was disappeared automatically. Also, the neurosurgeon told my sister that she found our whole family is too stressful and nervous that may affect my dad as well. Yes, I agree, when I compare with other patients' family members' behaviour. I do agree. The neurosurgeon arranged a psychatrist to meet us this afternoon but I cannot spare time for it. So my mum & sis will go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karenl Posted February 27, 2004 Share Posted February 27, 2004 Berisa Continuing to hope that everything turns out OK for your dad. I think it was a bit rude of the neuro to suggest that your family's state of anxiety was having a negative impact on your dad - it sounds to me as though you are actually a wonderful support for him. But it's good that you are all going to be seeing someone who might be able to give you some good strategies to help you get through this. Hope it helps - can't hurt!! All the best Karem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berisa Posted February 28, 2004 Author Share Posted February 28, 2004 Yesterday was a crazy day. My dad is now suffered from steriod-induced psychosis. He has delusions, imagines things that is not true. The first day after taking max. dosage of steriod shot, he thought he was in a palace and said here is very beautiful. The day after, he told us saw a bear flying and an aeroplane flying in the ceiling but he knows that's not true. But he yesterday yelled that he is not in hospital and we all are cheated. Told all of us leave immediately otherwise they (he meant the nurse and doctor) will kill us all. He told me to bring mom, sis and brother leaving immediately by taking helicopter (sp?). He yelled for almost 4 hours and told this is a trap and told all patients and people there call the police and do not believe the nurse and doctors are medical people, but in fact they are the bad guys. As he thinks he is going to be killed, he called our names loudly and said he loves us very much. He does love us very much He has a bit violent as well, he is manic and bite my hand once and grapped me and mom. He also "splash" saliva on my face, my mom face and the neurosurgeon's face. He is tightened to the bed. I was so upset to see him behave like this. The nurses said this happens always on patients. They get use to it. The chief nurse said my dad is not the craziest one already. Other nurses said there is 5 out of 10 people like this and told us don't worry as they know how to handle it. Afterwards, the neurosurgeon arranged my dad change to another more quiet room that fewer patients there but with more nurses manpower there. Neurosurgeon said they cannot stop steriod this moment because of the brain swelling and I asked any meds to calm him down. She answered those meds will worsen the swelling that they cannot give too much. Now she arranges my dad has the brain CT scan in coming Tuesday and if the result showed only one tumor there, they will do one more craniotomy by taking off more brain tissues that seems to be normal (more aggressive approach) that his vision will be affected permanently. All both left side of his eyes vision will be blind. If the CT result shows more than 1 tumor in his brain. They may not consider to do craniotomy. We asked about Gamma knife and she answered the effect of gamma knife takes a very long time around 6 months to 1 year. Today the neurosurgeon phoned to my brother and told him my dad now is more calm. It is really sad to see him yelling and being crazy. I just want his brain could be handled as soon as possible that he has no need to take steriod any more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheresaKB Posted February 28, 2004 Share Posted February 28, 2004 Hi Berisa, I am so so sorry that you are going through this tough time. My Dad also had hallucanations when he was on steroids and I know how scary this could be for you and your family. Please hang in there, perhaps tomorrow will be better. I will be saying a special prayer for your Dad. Theresa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daggiesmom Posted February 28, 2004 Share Posted February 28, 2004 Dear Berisa, I know you're going though alot. Your Dad enjoyed taking care of his family. That was his joy in life. That made him happy. He loves you and your family loves him. That's the greatest gift. I'll pray for you. You're such nice people. Love, Joanie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karenl Posted February 28, 2004 Share Posted February 28, 2004 Oh Berisa, what else can they possibly throw at you?? This is so much for you and your family to have to bear - and yet you do! I believe one thing that cancer shows us is that we are alot stronger than we ever thought we could be. You WILL get through this. You know that everyone here is behind you 100%. Please keep us updated on what is happening, and let us know what we can do to help. As always, keeping your family in my thoughts. Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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