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Posted

Our dear sweet Bill, the most loving man in the world was laid to rest yesterday. His visitation and funeral were exactly the way he planned and more beautiful than I imagined. Our children and grandchildren carried roses to the altar for him during the funeral Mass and two choirs combined to create the most gorgeous music performing specifically the songs he had requested.

So many people loved him and admired him and they just kept flowing in to the funeral home to tell us what a wonderful man he was. We were always so very proud of him but that night we were bursting at the seams with pride. He touched so many, many peoples lives and made everyone laugh. On the ride to the cemetery our seven year old grandson was amazed that the line of cars following the limousines was so long that he could not see the end. All of the grandkids were excited to see all of the people who came to tell us how much Papa was loved.

I am frightened to stay alone in the house so friends and family are taking turns being with me. They gave me some medication to help me get through the last few days but now I want to feel everything. I want to feel the intensity of the pain and sorrow that his passing has brought for all of us. I want the world to know that nothing will ever be the same again. Our kids are being very strong about this and I put on a happy face for the grandkids but when we are alone the sorrow is almost unbearable. We will never get over this.

Bill sweetie, I am here and I miss you so much I can hardly breathe. That is all I am doing. . .breathing. I feel like I have died also. I am so very proud of you as I have always been. I wore the black suit and black hat and black gloves for the funeral just like you wanted. I tried to make sure everything was perfect for you. The gardenia you had Patti get me is just gorgeous. The scent is filling the house. You thought of everything and I didn't even realize you were ready to go. I'm sorry I missed the signs. It just all happened too quickly. I am trying to be strong and I am trying to be brave. I am trying to convince my broken heart to keep beating. I will hold my head up and take it one day at a time. Please keep me in your prayers sweetheart. I am not good at this. I love you and I miss you and I long for the day when you will hold me once again.

You are the best husband and father and grandpa and papa in the world. You are my perfect love.

Colleen

Guest Piermarie
Posted

Colleen,

Your words have brought tears flowing from my eyes....I am so sorry for your pain and hope that you have peace to take its place soon....

With Sympathy to you and your family,

Pier

Posted

Colleen, so sorry for your great loss. Thanks for taking the time to let us know, and in such beautiful words. Bill will live on in the sweet memories and in the lives of all the people he touched. Blessings. Don

Posted

Colleen:

My God help you get through this very difficult time. Sounds like the service was simply beautiful. It does make you feel very proud when so many people show up to pay respect to your loved one. May you find comfort in his memories and sending HUGS to you.

My mom is going through pain like yours right now and I feel so helpless. I don't live in the same town she does (over an hour away), but I call her every day to see how she's doing. Savor the memories!

Posted

Colleen,

My deepest sympathy... may you take solace in the knowledge of God's enduring mercy, and the thought of a heaven so perfect it is beyond comprehension... Please stay with us on this board and let this community of people help you through this difficult time......

Posted

Colleen,

I am keeping you in my prayers as you try to move into this new phase of your life. Find out what you need to do to keep going each hour, each day, each week. I know there were days that my mother-in-law could do nothing but cry and that was just fine. She isn't a part of these boards, but I often share posts from the dear spouses who are dealing with the loss of their love and they seem to help her. She somehow finds comfort in knowing others' experiences are similar to her own. I pray that you, too, will find solace and hope here.

God's peace~

Karen M.

Posted

Colleen,

So sorry for your lost, your words were powerful.

You wanted to feel all the pain and sorrow by yourself,

you will, it will come in waves, strong and high to slowly

reduce, just to start again when you are not expecting them.

May his presence help you go through the time of sorrow,

you should feel him by your side hwelping and protecting you.

My condolences.

J.C.

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