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Waiting, not very patiently


beckyg

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Last week my oncologist said that the current chemo regimen, if it is doing anything, is not doing much, so he suggests we change. I am okay with that. I talked to him about what he would recommend--he says he would go wqith Gemzar this time, and then I showed him some information about the GVAX trials. The Cancer Center in Tyler is one of the sites listed (and they are only 80 miles from here!) He was excited about it. He said that from the information I gave him, I look like a good candidate, but of course it isn't his study, so he can't say for sure. Anyway, he called the research nurse listed and left her a detailed message about me last Thursday. Monday I called him to see if he had heard back yet; he hadn't so he called again. The response was that since the first round of results hit the news recently, I am "not the only one" trying to get into their trials. He said the nurse's primary concern was whether my tumor was in a place where they would be able to easily get a good sample. My oncologist thinks that will be very easy either by bronchoscopy or through my side because it is in the pleura of my right lung. So it all sounds good, and I am excited about this trial, but I so hate waiting! (As if any of us like it, I know.) Hopefully with the new information they'll be able to decide pretty soon whether they want me to come for an evaluation at least. I have high hopes for this thing, but I hate being totally off treatment for very long--chemo has not been particularly hard on me, so I am not in a real need of a break, and I get nervous about it when I am not actively trying to poison the bad guys in there.

We have a new round of pregnancies in my family. It's funny--people in my life this last year have been hesitant to tell me good news (especially things like mole biopsies coming back benign--as if I would wish cancer on anyone.) I am good at celebrating people's good news, and crying with thme on the bad news. But I have a hard time with all these babies--I want one so badly. I don't turn into the green-eyed monster over them in front of anyone, but man, am I jealous. I am back up on the steroids for breathing again, but so far I have managed to restrict my outbursts to people moaning about "bad hair days" and "not being able to breathe" because of their allergies.

Anyway, enough rambling. I have a stack of work on my desk that isn't shrinking--in fact, everything seems to be taking twice as long to do as I expect it to take.

Good day to everyone.

Becky

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Becky,

When I was little my Mom used to say I was the worse "waiter" she ever knew. Welp, things haven't changed much over the years! :)

I'm with you! Once I make a decision to do something I want to start doing it RIGHT FLIPPIN' NOW!!! As in "what do you mean I gotta wait until next week???!!!!"

Anyway, I hope that:

A). You are accepted for the trial (and soon! :)) and:

B). The GVAX beats the living TAR out of those beasties inside of you.

Dean

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Becky,

As I have said many times, I am a lousy waiter, so I hope you are better at it than I am, but what exciting news that you may be eligible for the vaccine trial!!!! We have all read so much about it, how amazing would it be to be the first one on the boards to try it out first hand -- and how even more amazing will it be when it works and kicks this crap into submission?????

Talk about being in the right place at the right time --they have to take you! This trial is practically in your backyard (along with the shuttle pieces...) and I have a wonderful feeling about it! I will say a prayer that the next week flies by and you hear the great news that you have the opportunity to participate!

Keep us posted!!

Heather

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(((((Becky))))),

Gentle hugs to you today! I know what you mean about others and their "Bad Hair Days". I am to the point that I have pulled off my wig and asked if they really wanted to talk about a bad hair day! Some days you just have to find the humor in a given situation!

God Bless,

MO

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Becky,

I guess I didn't realize that the GVAX trial was the vaccine!!! How exciting for you to get on the trial. I will keep positive thoughts that you will definately be accepted.

Just know that the steroids are part of your negative outlook for other's good news. It's not you. When you feel better you will rejoice with your family.

I am soooooo hoping for good news about the trial. Let us know....

TAnn

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Becky,

On the plus for the trial, you are SO young and otherwise healthy! (One of the reasons the "C" word was so devastating, as well.) I hope you are one of the chosen ones, whether it's an "easy" harvest or not, here's hoping they go with it and the damn thing WORKS!

...and my biggest wish for you is that by the time you are MY advanced age (LOL), you have one on your knee and another glimmer in your eye!

And for crying out loud, get ON with it all ready! It's been over five minutes, you've waited long enough! Don't they understand "priorities"? You have a life to lead, not time to kill!

It's about time for the tide to turn more favorable for you, SOON would be great!

Becky

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Becky....The GVax trial is tailor-made for you. I just know you'll be the ideal candidate!! I see no reason why you can't make a pest out of yourself while waiting to hear if you're accepted into the trial. Find out the names of the people running the show and keep after them...I find getting chummy with the main players' personal assistants gets me more inside info than any other approach. Try to swallow the steroids "attitude" for a while and brush up on your sweet side....We know deep down we get more with honey...don't we?? Good luck and keep the faith.

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Becky,

I will be keeping everything movable crossed that the vaccine trial is available to you and that you'll be one of those who has a complete and many-years-long term response to it. Hope you hear from vaccine trial folks very soon.

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Another Becky weighing in, here -- So glad you're going for the trial. I'm keeping everything that I have two of crossed, too. I hope you're the nicest squeaky wheel they've ever had to put up with -- Whatever works!!! I'm so sorry you have to wait, and sorry about the green-eyed monster, too. Who is the beautiful little girl with you in the photo?

BeckyCW

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