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Grief over those we lost here.


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This was originally written on APRIL 19, 2004- I thought I'd bring it back to the top because it is so relevant today. We've had so much loss around here in such a sort time. After being here so long, I know that these things happen, but these are some really inspirational words. I am bringing them back up in hopes that it will help some of us thru these difficult times.

Love to all~


I am grieving over those we have lost here that I had grown so close to. My IN BOX is full of correspondence from these friends of mine.

I guess what brought it up was all the preparations I am making for the fundraiser. The memory tote bags etc... I went into my SAVED area looking for a certain e-mail and ran across alot of e-mails from Greg Gaither (Bart Ziggy) they date up to the 8th, the day before he died.

I read these e-mails and feel their battles all over again. I remember our conversations and phone calls and the special friendships we developed. I feel so badly for their families who were left behind.

I miss our friends.

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I think that most of them would be pleased that they are alive in our hearts and our memories.

It's a legacy of sorts, being part of that continuum, and held dear in active memory.

In the course of battling this disease, and being part of several support groups, I have lost more friends than most folks my age would have. I have lost these friends to cancer; but I have not lost the love and respect and admiration I have for them, the grace and dignity they have shown me over the course of their fight. And too, I know that I will see them all again when it's my turn to go over.

It doesn't diminish the pain of loss, but it does strengthen my faith.

Prayers for all of us, those who have gone ahead and those who are still on this side....



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I continue to be truly astonished at how sad I get and how much I miss someone that I have never met face to face or heard their voice.

I think it says some wonderful about the human condition.

I do miss them all and am glad that their loved ones continue to be part of our family.


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With the years piling up on me, I realized that all the people

I knew personnally or those I met in this forum and are now

gone, are kept alive in our mind and will never be dead to us.

They stay with us and in my faith, I know that they always have

an eye on us and help everyone of us to keep going.


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Katie--a little warning for a tissue next time. Just kidding. I have tears rolling down my face right now. While I did not know Bart Ziggy, I think I joined on right at the time he passed on, I have visions, clear visions and memories of me, Nat, Steph, Andrea B., Denise and Laurie all wishing each other a "Happy Bahumbug New year" on New Year's Eve. And in such a short time, dear Nat, Step and Andrea lost their mom.

It is so overwhelming. I got REALLY mad at a friend a few days ago. She scolded me for not mentioning that my grandfather passed away and for not being sad and she got into issues asking if I really loved him. I said OF COURSE I did, we spent every holiday together growing up, I called there every day, but he was 95 years old and it is a bit difficult to be upset over the death of someone who lived a healthy 95 years (well 92 years, he was down hill for 3 years) when Andrea's mom passed away the same weekend.

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Katie, I miss our friends too...JudyB and I went back and forth PM'ing eachother one day, I felt like if anything was going down, she'd know what to do, and of course, she did...then I think about Lenny, and Becky, and I cry every time I see their pictures in old posts or on the tribute.

They will always be a part of me, in some way, and I am grateful to have had the honor of knowing them...of knowing everyone here.


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I know! JudyB was (like you) a pioneer member here, she was here from the very beginning- our caveman days! LOL

Her encouragement and spirit helped me at my most wretched, weak, disparing times. She was a treasure and a gift to those she touched.

Lenny was a shock, and a sweet positive soul.

Sue M.

Mr. Mike




David W


I can always go on about how these people personally touched my soul. Then there are all the family members, those like our dads, whom we got to know thru their families or caregivers, who have passed away.... many of those family members are still here.

It's so very sad at times like these when I think of them all. I hope we make a difference. I hope those of us left behind make a difference so that no more of our friends will have to die.

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Sue M. - nice lady with a feisty streak. I liked her.

And brave Greg. And sweet Ada. And Buddy, whom norme loves so dearly. And smart BeckyG.

Lord, hold close to you forever these wonderful people who are gone from this life. Help our government, scientists, health care providers and the public to understand this awful disease and to see the people it affects as they really are.

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I've been on this "new" site since DAY 1 and have cherished each "acquaintance" since then. My heart is bereft with the loss of our talented, compassionate, intelligent, inspirational members. So senseless...so heart-rending. I miss them all terribly.

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It is so overwhelming to realize what tragedy we all face. I feel such pain for everyone who has lost someone to this disgusting disease. My Bill has been gone less than two months and my heart aches every single minute for him. I feel everyone's loss and I pray continually for an answer and some help and some peace for all of us.

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The sadness of our losses will be with us always but just think of the love we have shared with people we NEVER would have met if not for this site! People we probably have never talked to, wouldn't know if we tripped over them in the street (cept Snowflake and Ry, the are the ones with the TP rolls). I am just truly amazed that God saw fit to throw a group of people together such as we are and make a "Family" out of them!

In todays world where most of us don't even know our neighbors, we have caring and compassion for people all over the country (world) who we will never meet. Amazing!

Thank you Katie,Rick and all the pioneers!

God Bless you!


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Wagons ho!

Gee, wonder if that was a travelling bordello call? Hmmm...

Of course, by us being spread all over, a face-to-face meeting is pretty close to impossible (hopefully so when Ry and I are tossing paper! LOL) - wish we could bridge THAT gap! I'd love to go shoe shopping with you, Mo - ESPECIALLY to a buy one get one sale - I can NEVER find a second pair I like! :roll:

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  • 1 year later...

Thanks for this Katie,

I did not know those member since I came here Jan.05. But you certainly have a lot of fond memories of them and miss them very much.

I came here in Jan. 05. During that short time I have gotten to know so many people who I consider my second family. I give support where I can and pray I make some kind of a difference.

I grieve just like if it was a family member of friend when I read the news that one of our members have passed. I light a candle and say a prayer for each one.

I miss the presence of our members who have passed and know that they are in a much better place with their maker. It was his calling and he needed them there. They were so courageous and may have lost the battles but put up one h-ll of a fight. They are my heros.

I will always remember, Betty(dancing feet), David C with his sense of humor, Cathyr and her posts of encouragament while she was going through her own battle and keeping it quiet, Francine (bluebayou) her support, Nancy C who lost her Mike (who danced his final dance with Nicole), and of course now Peggys, Don.

Also all the numerous caregivers who lost love ones they are too numerous to name.

This board is a blessing as it has lifted me up when I felt so confused and had no place to go. I use it as I need it and give back what I can to help.

The support we get from this site has lifted so many people up and has given them a reason to fight. And so many, so many have conquered the beast and gives hope to the new members that there is light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to reach for it and believe. So many of our members have beaten the odds and continue to do so.

The best part about this site, is the good news. Eveyone of us feels so much joy when their scans come back NED or STABLE... and we reply so enthusiastically to their joy because we feel it too.

Many of our members may be gone, but they will always hold a special place deep within my heart. Each was unique in their own way, and so courageous.

My feelings now I open

to you my fellow friends

to walk these healing paths together

and try our hearts to mend.

It’s hard to put into some words

the feelings that we feel

For one day they are normal

the next they’re just not real

And so I put my deep, deep pain

into the words of grieving

so you my friend be understood

and find yourself believing

that healing can for surely come to you

in spite of your deep pain

and one day you find yourself

to be dancing once again.


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Our heartfelt thanks to God for sending us this group as family.

I love what MO wrote, I did not know her. I printed her post.

Katie, I am a broken record thanking you, Rick, your Father, and children.

To this family:

Literally and completely, you have sustained us through our journey.

We are aching today, but can't imagine the pain of not having this haven to bring our pain to.

(sorry for the dangling participle.........I just have so many emotions that I am madated to try to get across to you...........words are impotent, I hope you can hear my heart.)



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I feel we owe so much to those who have come before. I am stupefied athow overwhelmed with anguish I am at the loss of Peggy's Don...someone i've never met. I don't give in to emotion easily and I have never been one to reach out to strangers but this board is teaching me a new way to get counseling and comfort. Our LC patients are the heros of their own stories. Whether the battle is long or short each and every one of them is a monument to courage. I know that those who have passed are truly, truly in a better place but that knowledge doesn't fill our void. We miss them every day.


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