gail Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Bear with me here . . . Tom died this weekend...dropped over dead at home, age 48, with his wife and kids there. 3 boys. All redheads. He coached soccer with my husband for many years, so it was those every weekend with the family . . . The viewing is tomorrow and I know it will be packed. My husband, who is not a viewing person, is very firm about going. I may use an ativan. I know it is important to go, for Debbie and the boys. His death made me think (duh) about my/our cancers. I am grateful that I've had these years. I was just telling Bob that these years have had their benefits . . we are much nicer to each other, and more joyous each day. Thank you for letting me share. gail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowflake Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, I am so very sorry to hear that you have lost a dear friend. I remember when my sister-in-law took a turn for the worse (one of Mark's younger sisters - he's one of nine kids) I told Mark that knowing you were dying must be a sort of blessing, like God is giving you time to make amends and "finish" what you had been working on in life....of course, some things (like children) are never really "finished", but peace can be made with many for THEIR sake as well as our own. My big push after diagnosis and acceptance was to get a will on file - sure had no idea I might die some day (pretty stupid, huh?). Again, my condolences on your loss. Loss of any kind is hard, loss of a close friend is a real bite in the butt. Take care, Becky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathy Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, I am so sorry you have lost a dear friend...I am not one for viewing either, I just stand in the back because I know it helps the family just to know you are there... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, My condolences on the lost of your friend. Always hard to go see them for the last time. Ativan will help you. J.C. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelliemacs Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 wow these days are getting harder. Were loosing too many loved ones again. I am so sorry for your dear friend and his family. words seen inadequate right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhutch1366 Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, I am very sorry for the loss of your friend. XOXOX MaryAnn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norme Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, am so sorry for you and your friend's family. It is like we say on here all the time. No one knows when their day is whether we are sick or not. Only God knows that day. So we must live each day to the fullest and that is what Buddy and I tried to do since July 30, 2002, the first day of diagnoses. Any day, any time it can happen but we cannot dwell on that. We must learn to take our days here on earth one day at a time and be happy with that day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karen335 Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, I am so sorry about the loss of your dear friend. This disease and others is just not fair. Prayers for Tom's family and yours... God Bless, Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gerbil runner Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, I'm so sorry you've lost a friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hebbie Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail, I am so sorry for the loss of your family friend. Sending prayers for your family and for his. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 One day at a time! Make the most of each. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiny Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Gail- I'm sorry for the loss of your friend and for his precious family. Your post makes a very valid point. Take care and take the ativan. Thinking of you all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ginnyde Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Dear Gail, Just not fair, a young man in the prime of life with young children. I ache for his wife, no time to say goodbye or prepare, just not fair. There are no words, except I am so sorry. Ginny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimblanchard Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 I am sorry for your loss and sadness. I have thought, too, how much I treasure the time my husband and I are sharing every day. Margaret from Iowa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debaroo Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 Gail, I am also so sorry about your friends death. You, your husbandand your friends family are in my prayers. I wish there were more I could do. Take care, Gail, Deb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gail Posted April 23, 2004 Author Share Posted April 23, 2004 Thank you everyone---- One the way to the viewing I popped an ativan. I don't seem to do these things well anymore--once I found myself making notes for my own viewing, so this time I decided the anti anxiety was called for. And it helped, because I was able to focus on Debbie and the boys. It just brought back we could be gone, any one of us, any time. At least the cancer has taught us to kick back, stop and smell those roses. thanks again gail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 (((((((((((((((((GAIL)))))))))))))))))))) I smell those roses each and every day my friend! How true it is. So sorry you lost a dear friend. Warm and Gentle Hugs, Connie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hobored Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 my heart cries for you. may you find a sense of peace each day. If you lived near me I would bake you a pie and cook you a dinner to help with the hurt. you are in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nancy B Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 Dear Gail, Just saw your post and I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. My prayers are with your friend Debbie and her boys. Life can be so short - we really do need to "stop and smell the roses". I have to keep reminding myself. Love and Hugs, Nancy B Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carleen Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 Gail, I am so sorry for the loss of your dear friend. I do understand what you mean about being given a gift in the midst of this cancer nightmare. Keith has told me a number of times that the one good thing that has come of his getting this disease is that we are able to appreciate each moment together and we never take our love of granted. We are closer and more grateful for one another and for all the gifts God has given us. I know that most of the time I feel devastated and cheated by this turn of fate, but there are moments of clarity where I remember that none of us are guaranteed tomorrow and we have been allowed to see the other side of the looking glass in that we have had a wake up call to life. (((((Gail))))) Please let Debbie know that we are praying for her and her boys that God eases their pain and brings them peace. Carleen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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